FYI...The Geek Squad are a bunch of idiots!
I am talking about the technical support people at my local Best Buy. I was having some trouble with my computer running slowly and being unresponsive. The last time I remember it running that slowly was when I first installed my video card. After a few driver updates though, I was running as fast as ever...until recently. I wasn't sure what triggered it, but it was after a re-boot. It just took 10 minutes for my Anti-Virus to load into memory, a task that normally takes less than two. I had ideas that it was the video card, but I didn't know if I needed to buy a new one or if I just needed to tinker with the one I had. It was a Saturday and I had plans to go to Raleigh so I thought it might be alright this once to take my computer to one of the many computer repair shops around. Unfortunately, the only one open on Saturday didn't open until 1pm, and I didn't want to waste my whole day on this one task. It was 11am...I thought I would try taking it to the Geek Squad.
I knew right away that I was wasting my time when I saw that the least you could get away from those people paying was $65...I can't imagine paying that much for a problem I could fix with a few drivers and a little common sense. Well, the girl that finally got around to helping me was sure it was a virus that was causing my problem. A note to everyone, if you want to piss me off, treat me like a moron that couldn't possibly have a clue. Virus?? You just turned it on, Sugar. Its like that scene from The Fugitive where Harrison Ford tells the paramedics to tell the attending doctor that the patient has a puncture in his upper gastric area. The medic replies, "How the hell could he tell that by looking at his face??" She stuck a flash drive in the USB and starting running a little diagnostic program. She told me several times that it would take 20 minutes if I wanted to look around. I DIDN'T want to look around...but instead of just telling her I heard her the first four times and that I was ignoring her, I decided to take a look around. After all, its Best Buy, right? Lots of stuff I like, right? Well, In under 2 minutes of browsing, I had three different encounters with overeager associates wanting to "help me with something." FUCK NO! Leave me alone and let me browse, asshole! So I decided to go back to the Geeks desk and lord over the little girl who was about 75% done with the scan. Twenty minutes my ass, chica! She asked me to sign some form and write down my password. Write down my password??? Fuck if I want to write my private password for little Miss "You've Got a Virus." Despite the fact that she was so sure earlier that I had a virus, there was absolutely no virus found. Honey, I knew I didn't have a virus from the beginning. I tried to tell you I thought it was the video card, but you ignored me.
It was at this point a guy stepped in and took over for the girl. I guess he was the head geek and was noticing that I was getting a little chippy with Ms. Carnac the Geeknificent. At first, I thought this may get better now. Well, it didn't. In fact, he recommended the $65 diagnostic service which would figure out what the problem was. He explained to me that the diagnostic is a more comprehensive series of tests and MORE virus scanning. It was then that I realized no one here knew the first thing about computers. The test programs did all the work and these fools just collect the money. I told the guy again that I didn't have a virus. He pointed out my Limewire icon on my computer and ask me how I could be so sure and enlightened me that peer-to-peer file sharing is one of the easiest ways to get a virus or spyware. Oh really, wise guy? I must have looked like I was born yesterday, but all his words of wisdom did was insult my intelligence and piss me off further. I had had enough. I told him that I would rather try a few fixes myself before I committed to any of his diagnostic bullshit. I didn't want to have to do it myself. For once, I just wanted someone to fucking do what I asked rather than try to be so damn smart and reinvent the wheel.
I went to Circuit City, purchased a new video card and asked if I could return it if it turned out I didn't need it. Well, once I opened the tower and pulled out the video card, which has its own processor and thus its own fan to keep it cool, I noticed the fan couldn't move because it was choked with dust and debris. I used the brush attachment on my vacuum cleaner and sucked all the dust out, cleaned out the tower in general and replaced the video card. It's working fine now. I got a refund at Circuit City, since I didn't need the new card. This is how I became such a multi-talented guy. You just can't afford to be an idiot consumer in this day and age. If its not the Geek Squad, its your mechanic, your stock broker, your cable guy, your Congressman or your credit card company. They all take advantage of the fact that most people are uninformed sheep ready to be fleeced. Well, I am no sheep. I am an ornery goat that will ram you in the ass if you aren't careful!
I knew right away that I was wasting my time when I saw that the least you could get away from those people paying was $65...I can't imagine paying that much for a problem I could fix with a few drivers and a little common sense. Well, the girl that finally got around to helping me was sure it was a virus that was causing my problem. A note to everyone, if you want to piss me off, treat me like a moron that couldn't possibly have a clue. Virus?? You just turned it on, Sugar. Its like that scene from The Fugitive where Harrison Ford tells the paramedics to tell the attending doctor that the patient has a puncture in his upper gastric area. The medic replies, "How the hell could he tell that by looking at his face??" She stuck a flash drive in the USB and starting running a little diagnostic program. She told me several times that it would take 20 minutes if I wanted to look around. I DIDN'T want to look around...but instead of just telling her I heard her the first four times and that I was ignoring her, I decided to take a look around. After all, its Best Buy, right? Lots of stuff I like, right? Well, In under 2 minutes of browsing, I had three different encounters with overeager associates wanting to "help me with something." FUCK NO! Leave me alone and let me browse, asshole! So I decided to go back to the Geeks desk and lord over the little girl who was about 75% done with the scan. Twenty minutes my ass, chica! She asked me to sign some form and write down my password. Write down my password??? Fuck if I want to write my private password for little Miss "You've Got a Virus." Despite the fact that she was so sure earlier that I had a virus, there was absolutely no virus found. Honey, I knew I didn't have a virus from the beginning. I tried to tell you I thought it was the video card, but you ignored me.
It was at this point a guy stepped in and took over for the girl. I guess he was the head geek and was noticing that I was getting a little chippy with Ms. Carnac the Geeknificent. At first, I thought this may get better now. Well, it didn't. In fact, he recommended the $65 diagnostic service which would figure out what the problem was. He explained to me that the diagnostic is a more comprehensive series of tests and MORE virus scanning. It was then that I realized no one here knew the first thing about computers. The test programs did all the work and these fools just collect the money. I told the guy again that I didn't have a virus. He pointed out my Limewire icon on my computer and ask me how I could be so sure and enlightened me that peer-to-peer file sharing is one of the easiest ways to get a virus or spyware. Oh really, wise guy? I must have looked like I was born yesterday, but all his words of wisdom did was insult my intelligence and piss me off further. I had had enough. I told him that I would rather try a few fixes myself before I committed to any of his diagnostic bullshit. I didn't want to have to do it myself. For once, I just wanted someone to fucking do what I asked rather than try to be so damn smart and reinvent the wheel.
I went to Circuit City, purchased a new video card and asked if I could return it if it turned out I didn't need it. Well, once I opened the tower and pulled out the video card, which has its own processor and thus its own fan to keep it cool, I noticed the fan couldn't move because it was choked with dust and debris. I used the brush attachment on my vacuum cleaner and sucked all the dust out, cleaned out the tower in general and replaced the video card. It's working fine now. I got a refund at Circuit City, since I didn't need the new card. This is how I became such a multi-talented guy. You just can't afford to be an idiot consumer in this day and age. If its not the Geek Squad, its your mechanic, your stock broker, your cable guy, your Congressman or your credit card company. They all take advantage of the fact that most people are uninformed sheep ready to be fleeced. Well, I am no sheep. I am an ornery goat that will ram you in the ass if you aren't careful!