M: Emma Fraiser - Entry for 3 April 2075
ESTATE CHUMLEY CHOLMONDLEY-WARNER GUEST LIST, WEEK OF 31 MARCH:
Oh goodness, Mr. Jones -- I do not know if you can read this, but I suspect that I shall be quite busy until the end of next week, and thus will not be able to enjoy our rendezvous until that moment!! I do so hope you'll understand!!
- ANNETTE CHOLMONDLEY-WARNER: (lady of the house) gracious, how bossy! still, she is quite kind and helpful when one should need it; I asked her for where the soap is and managed to get a very interesting tidbit about her husband!!
- ADMIRAL ALGERNON RELISH: (former military man, twirler of moustaches?) suspect he is a grandfather; possible associate of the late Mr. Cholmondley-Warner? results are inconclusive -- v. jolly, if not somewhat bumbling, and has a penchant for talking about "the Motherland" and old military campaigns involving lions in Africa; to quote an old associate, "is he fronting"?
- JOSEPHINE VERMILION: (scarlet woman) suspect the late Mr. Cholmondley-Warner savored "women of the night"; Miss Vermilion may be one of his former "women of questionable morals and underpinnings." considers herself quite charming based wholly on the size of her bosom. am tempted to give her a talking to re: etiquette, covering one's heaving chest.
- JONATHAN PRUNE, PH.D.: (professor, book aficionado) kind, but a bit dotty; asked my name exactly 3 times over the course of dinnertime conversation within the past week, suspect I should wear a name tag as a result. apparently is a psychologist? apparently specializes in talking to young ladies about how delightful they are (!!!).
- THALLO SAP: (businessman, creeper [???]) former business associate of Mr. Cholmondley-Warner; has a penchant for cigars, hair grease, and leering. seems to be particularly attached to Miss Vermilion, but is not above branching out to "dance" with other ladies. am not sure what he actually means by dancing, as it is always in cupboards. am not sure I am ready to personally investigate this.
- WILHELMINA BIANCO: (heiress, dog breeder) very classy and reserved -- v. much a lady, in other words!! sometimes also likes to go dancing w/ Mr. Sap, but perhaps it is to teach him manners (???). likes to smoke cigarettes through fancy wand handles, thus making an otherwise nasty habit quite ladylike & refined (!!!).
- PENELOPE COCKATOO: (knitter, grandma, maker of hats) perhaps when I am an older lady, I could be Mrs. Cockatoo.
- RODOLPHUS TODDY: (butler) a crafty chap. do not have him figured out. quite helpful with your bags, though!
- RUSTY NAYLOR: (gardener) terribly frazzled & grumpy, poss. due to bad case of overgrown muttonchops hiding rose thorns (???). does not smile when smiled to. disconcerting, but perhaps misunderstood (???) -- a total bummer :'(
Oh goodness, Mr. Jones -- I do not know if you can read this, but I suspect that I shall be quite busy until the end of next week, and thus will not be able to enjoy our rendezvous until that moment!! I do so hope you'll understand!!