Long Weekend
Friday was my first official day of classes. I had all of them, one right after another, beginning at 9:30 and ending at roughly 2:30. I think I will be enjoying statistics and physics, but biochemistry will be a pain for the 12 weeks. That evening Theresa and I went over to Aurora to the outlet mall. I had a coupon for the Saks outlet since I am a preferred customer, that allowed me to receive a huge discount on anything in the store. I decided that the men's section sucked, so then I looked at the women's. I found a pair of knee-high Marc Jacobs boots that I thought my sister would like, so I bought them for her. I find out that they were misplaced in the store, and were only an American equivalent of a size 8. Bethany being a size 9 would not wear them. Following outlet mall, Theresa and I went to Wal-Mart to get candy and Teddy Grams for the XC men's team because I felt "shown up" by the women's captains since they bought their girls candy. I was up until around midnight making these bags of candy for the team and finding out if the size of the boots would work.
The next day I woke up at 5:20 AM in order to go to the XC scrimmage in Alleghany PA. Nobody had their license so that left me the only one allowed to drive the giant vans. I proceded to pass out the candy bags. Only 3 people said thank you for them. The others complained about the candy that was in there, or refused to take them at all due to "processed sugars." That pissed me off.
The team arrives at the scrimmage and I begin to get ready for the run. I take an asprin to help with teh shin-splints in my legs. It helped. The race began and for me being a lame runner, I thought my first mile was promising at 8 minutes. The second mile, however, was not promising. Since I was about 50 yards behind the person in front of me, I took a wrong turn on the course because it was not properly marked. I went roughly a half a mile out of my way. This made me even more angry. The run ended leaving me with a horrible time.
After the race, the team went to Hoss's. For those of you who don't know, Hoss's is a buffet. I hate buffets. I felt sick and still had to drive the team back to ol' Hiram. We arrive around 1:30. I decide to hurry up and exchange the boots for the next size up. Saks outlet is stupid and does not have the next size up. I then ask worker to help me find a different shoe for my sister. She does, they were a pair of Prada heels that are Bethany's favorite colors (red, orange, and pink). I think that she would really like them, even though they had a heel. I also found a Swarovski pin in the shape of a cow (bethany's nickname). I exchange the boots for the shoes and buy the pin. I end up $6 ahead from the night before.
I drive home. I get home. Sit in the hot-tub and tell my Dad about the race. Dad is slightly sympathetic. Mom and Bethany get home. I tell them about the meet and the team not appreciating the candy. I then give Bethany the pin and shoes. She gets really mad at me for the shoes saying that I don't think about things when I buy them. I did think about them... I thought she would like them. What made me so angry was that she could not believe that the team did not appreciate the gifts, when... she didn't either. We agreed that she would wear the shoes on occasion (including the following day at church). I thought that everything was ok.
Today (Sunday) I wake up, and start getting ready for work. I notice that Bethany was not wearing teh shoes. I asked why, she claims that she has blisters, and that she really didn't think she would ever wear the shoes. I called her a Liar. My Mom then yells at me for calling her a liar and saying that I spend too much money. Mom informed me that she and dad do well, but that I only make a little over minimum wage. I get angry again because I remembered that I hate my job. Mom then tells me to not buy my sister anything more because our tastes are different. That made me even more angry.
I go to work. I hate Rite Aid. I hate a lot of people that come in there. It is a waste. I can't wait to quit next March. I come home, Dad informs me that he is getting me a Jeep and that basically I have no say in the Jeep that he is going to get me. I am happy for going to be getting a car, but upset that I have no approval as to what I am getting. I am still pissed at my sister.
Dad does calm me down a bit by telling me that I can brag about being in XC later on in life, for nobody really remembers what anyone local does in High School or anything, but what they do with their college and careers. He told me I am to do great things. That made my day. Generally Dad is not the one that talks or calms me down. He generally makes me frustrated, but he is intelligent and I give him a lot of credit for what he has done for himself.
I apoligized to Bethany and I am going to once again exchange the shoes with her there, so she can get ones that she likes. I was still upset though when I left the house. I still felt that I was somehow getting the shaft for apoligizing. I thought of Devon the entire way up to Hiram. I used to call her every Sunday on my way back from home. She isn't there. I feel like I am finally in the grieving part of this whole thing and it makes me upset. Why is it happening during the inconvienient times.
I am stressed about school, angry about last year's GPA, and upset that I am such a perfectionist that I think I am failing out of college and horrible at XC. I feel unappreciated that I try to do good with the shoes but to no avail. GRRRRRR.... I think that in a normal situation I would not be like this, but the whole death issue is just overhead like a raincloud. I feel like Eeyore. Every school year has started with a death of a friend. Why did this one have to be Devon, it is too close?
Damn.
The next day I woke up at 5:20 AM in order to go to the XC scrimmage in Alleghany PA. Nobody had their license so that left me the only one allowed to drive the giant vans. I proceded to pass out the candy bags. Only 3 people said thank you for them. The others complained about the candy that was in there, or refused to take them at all due to "processed sugars." That pissed me off.
The team arrives at the scrimmage and I begin to get ready for the run. I take an asprin to help with teh shin-splints in my legs. It helped. The race began and for me being a lame runner, I thought my first mile was promising at 8 minutes. The second mile, however, was not promising. Since I was about 50 yards behind the person in front of me, I took a wrong turn on the course because it was not properly marked. I went roughly a half a mile out of my way. This made me even more angry. The run ended leaving me with a horrible time.
After the race, the team went to Hoss's. For those of you who don't know, Hoss's is a buffet. I hate buffets. I felt sick and still had to drive the team back to ol' Hiram. We arrive around 1:30. I decide to hurry up and exchange the boots for the next size up. Saks outlet is stupid and does not have the next size up. I then ask worker to help me find a different shoe for my sister. She does, they were a pair of Prada heels that are Bethany's favorite colors (red, orange, and pink). I think that she would really like them, even though they had a heel. I also found a Swarovski pin in the shape of a cow (bethany's nickname). I exchange the boots for the shoes and buy the pin. I end up $6 ahead from the night before.
I drive home. I get home. Sit in the hot-tub and tell my Dad about the race. Dad is slightly sympathetic. Mom and Bethany get home. I tell them about the meet and the team not appreciating the candy. I then give Bethany the pin and shoes. She gets really mad at me for the shoes saying that I don't think about things when I buy them. I did think about them... I thought she would like them. What made me so angry was that she could not believe that the team did not appreciate the gifts, when... she didn't either. We agreed that she would wear the shoes on occasion (including the following day at church). I thought that everything was ok.
Today (Sunday) I wake up, and start getting ready for work. I notice that Bethany was not wearing teh shoes. I asked why, she claims that she has blisters, and that she really didn't think she would ever wear the shoes. I called her a Liar. My Mom then yells at me for calling her a liar and saying that I spend too much money. Mom informed me that she and dad do well, but that I only make a little over minimum wage. I get angry again because I remembered that I hate my job. Mom then tells me to not buy my sister anything more because our tastes are different. That made me even more angry.
I go to work. I hate Rite Aid. I hate a lot of people that come in there. It is a waste. I can't wait to quit next March. I come home, Dad informs me that he is getting me a Jeep and that basically I have no say in the Jeep that he is going to get me. I am happy for going to be getting a car, but upset that I have no approval as to what I am getting. I am still pissed at my sister.
Dad does calm me down a bit by telling me that I can brag about being in XC later on in life, for nobody really remembers what anyone local does in High School or anything, but what they do with their college and careers. He told me I am to do great things. That made my day. Generally Dad is not the one that talks or calms me down. He generally makes me frustrated, but he is intelligent and I give him a lot of credit for what he has done for himself.
I apoligized to Bethany and I am going to once again exchange the shoes with her there, so she can get ones that she likes. I was still upset though when I left the house. I still felt that I was somehow getting the shaft for apoligizing. I thought of Devon the entire way up to Hiram. I used to call her every Sunday on my way back from home. She isn't there. I feel like I am finally in the grieving part of this whole thing and it makes me upset. Why is it happening during the inconvienient times.
I am stressed about school, angry about last year's GPA, and upset that I am such a perfectionist that I think I am failing out of college and horrible at XC. I feel unappreciated that I try to do good with the shoes but to no avail. GRRRRRR.... I think that in a normal situation I would not be like this, but the whole death issue is just overhead like a raincloud. I feel like Eeyore. Every school year has started with a death of a friend. Why did this one have to be Devon, it is too close?
Damn.