(no subject)
so summer is almost over and college is here! ... summer felt like it was really long but these last few week are flying by... I guess its because were laving soon... don’t get me wrong because I am SUPER excited for college...so excited that I have everything that I don’t plan on using packed already and i've never bough so many things in my life.. plus I took the time to pack them in their boxes and everything and just in case I would need to find it later (sometime before I leave) I wrote it down in a little notebook I have .. I was really bored and nothing to do because I didn’t have a car
...why do u think I would ever choose to live a day without my favorite beautiful little care...because some dumb fuck in the parking lot backed up into it and I would have left it broken but I couldn’t drive it so I had to get it fixed and it took forever (2 weeks) I mean I had a nice 2 weeks of doing a lot of nothing with a good excuse but sometimes it was annoying like when I needed it .. and 2 weeks of doing nothing gets on your nerves after while so I was very very happy to get it back.
so back the college thing yea I wanna leave and I’m excited but I hate that no one is going with me... and not someone in specific but everyone .. like I always feel safe because if anything happens or I need something theres soo many people I can call but in DC everyone won be there... and the people that I feel most comfortable depending on are the ones who will never be there which worries me but I guess ill get used to it
plus another thing that sucks about leaving is the my mom wants to do a dumb party for me at the dumb keys... I hate having parties for myself I mean I’ve never had a party just for me because I hate it...the thought of it, the attention, the pressure of everything being good... it sucks and when she asked me if I wanted a party I said no mom and you know what I meant it! I mean how difficult it is for her to understand no...no I don’t want a party no I wont regret not having one no I’m not lying to you and asking you to do a surprise one for me....regardless of how much I argued with her about how much I hate parties and how little she knows me she’s still doing the stupid party which I DONT WANT!!! and yesterday I told her that I would show up on Saturday to her dumb party and if it was for me I was driving right back here and she said fine... I don’t think she thinks I’m serious and I am because I could not have told her more clearly that I didn’t want it...she just got the kitchen done so she insisted so I told her that I knew deep down she just wanted to do a party so that everyone could see her new kitchen so she should just have a new kitchen party and invite everyone over and she said that what she would do BUT today someone from the keys called me and told me Saturday was their birthday and they wanted to know if I minded doing the party together... I told him he could have the party because it wasn’t mine and he said that he was invited and heard that it was for me but he wasn’t allowed to say anything... now here I go again MOM I DONT WANT A STUPID PARTY I’m going to be so mad plus its going to waste my day driving over there and back here... plus hate the dumb keys and I haven’t been to the keys in forever ...since like before school was over so I haven’t seen anyone in forever I don’t want to explain to them how my summer was or what I did or why I look different or why I cut my hair and explain why its still not blonde =( or tell them where I’m going for college or when I’m leaving...the same dumb questions I hear every freakin day that I’m sick of answering basically this has ruined the rest of my week because its going to bother me until its over
I felt sick at like 5 so I went to sleep and just woke up and now theres nothing to do nothing on TV and no sleep left in my body.. I really wish I had more to say because now I have to figure out how to entertain myself ... hopefully something will come to me