lj vs. myspace
Ok. So i've decided something....my lj is going to be more of where i write for serious and my space is going to be for fun...here is the link to myspace if you're interested. http://www.myspace.com/kersplat3
i know i'm whining but i have no one to vent to at the moment...and Spike took the day off, so i apologize in advance to those who choose to read this.
alrighty, so once again i've been thinking (scary thought i know) and i know i said that i'm gonna take things a day at a time and that i'm putting the ball in another's court and that's it...right? wrong...i don't know what to do. i have little faith that in the end i'm not going to get let down..cause we all know that regardless of what i say, i'm gonna get my hopes up...why can't G-d give us a road map to life with directions on it? and i mean like 100% clear directions, not the stuff you get via mapquest...i just want to know for once that what i'm doing/pursuing is the right course of action...i just want to be happy, you know? maybe i want for too much right now...i just can't help but see so many ppl my age already happy...it's kind of depressing. my job keeps me happy and occupied, but it's not completely fulfilling...i mean it is on that side of the house...but i'm lacking on the other and i'm not balanced and therefore, not happy. i'm surrounded by ppl and completely lonely. i'm not asking for life to be simple (although i wouldn't turn it down), i'm just asking for a lil security in my personal life for once. i want someone who wants me as well...who loves me for who i am, the bad and the good...someone who'll pursue me just a lil and not just expect me to wait forever. but most of all, i want the one i love to love me in return and not doubt it, not fight it, and not let extra factors get in the way, but to fight to make it work.
on another note...class started today and it should be alright, it's a bit interesting and it's being taught by 2 airforce guys...weather was rainy and all i wanted to do was nap...i got my ass kicked in 2 games of bowling (i will not divulge the scores, too painful)...and oh, my mom rescued another rescue...as in an entire nother organization to include 24 animals...oy vey...thoughts and prayers to the doggies. boy do i miss them.
i know i'm whining but i have no one to vent to at the moment...and Spike took the day off, so i apologize in advance to those who choose to read this.
alrighty, so once again i've been thinking (scary thought i know) and i know i said that i'm gonna take things a day at a time and that i'm putting the ball in another's court and that's it...right? wrong...i don't know what to do. i have little faith that in the end i'm not going to get let down..cause we all know that regardless of what i say, i'm gonna get my hopes up...why can't G-d give us a road map to life with directions on it? and i mean like 100% clear directions, not the stuff you get via mapquest...i just want to know for once that what i'm doing/pursuing is the right course of action...i just want to be happy, you know? maybe i want for too much right now...i just can't help but see so many ppl my age already happy...it's kind of depressing. my job keeps me happy and occupied, but it's not completely fulfilling...i mean it is on that side of the house...but i'm lacking on the other and i'm not balanced and therefore, not happy. i'm surrounded by ppl and completely lonely. i'm not asking for life to be simple (although i wouldn't turn it down), i'm just asking for a lil security in my personal life for once. i want someone who wants me as well...who loves me for who i am, the bad and the good...someone who'll pursue me just a lil and not just expect me to wait forever. but most of all, i want the one i love to love me in return and not doubt it, not fight it, and not let extra factors get in the way, but to fight to make it work.
on another note...class started today and it should be alright, it's a bit interesting and it's being taught by 2 airforce guys...weather was rainy and all i wanted to do was nap...i got my ass kicked in 2 games of bowling (i will not divulge the scores, too painful)...and oh, my mom rescued another rescue...as in an entire nother organization to include 24 animals...oy vey...thoughts and prayers to the doggies. boy do i miss them.