A Mother's Thoughts on Tybee Island.
One of the greatest fears a parent of an autistic child can have is what will happen to them when they grow up into adults, functional adults who cannot and should not have to be babysat like 6 year olds. He should be allowed to walk down the street or sit on the curb in peace. He should be able to wait outside (observing the law, might I add) while his brother purchases his lunch. And his brother should not be blamed for "leaving him alone", when Clifford was breaking no laws and neither was his brother.
I can see my son in all of the descriptions of Clifford's behavior, and will tell you now there is no similarity between the look of his awkwardness and the look of an inebriated person (after years hanging out with college frat boys, I should know...). My son, with his over five foot height at age 8 and exceedingly large feet he's yet to grow into, will likely be one of those autistic adults who can hold a job, who can sustain himself, can even live on his own if he chooses to do so. However, that will not protect him from the type of treatment he could receive from poorly trained police officers like those on Tybee Island, who were intimidated by Clifford's physical characteristics. I can completely picture such a scenario in my mind: His failure to "look them in the eyes", his slower-than-expected physical responses to shouted instructions that he is still struggling to process. His fear and confusion at these men, who seem angry and are yelling, and why they are approaching him in the first place...
I do not say that police officers should not be able to do their jobs. I do not think that, were Clifford sitting on the curb on any other day, he would have been approached like that. The police officers were hyper aware, because of the crowds, and perhaps they were being extra vigilant. However, that does not excuse the manner in which they approached Clifford, or the force they used on him. Police should be trained to recognize the difference between inebriation and autism. In truth, I can think of no excuse as to why they are not.
And so, as parents of autistic children, we are again faced with the challenge - do we help train these police officers? Do we train our children on how to respond when a police officer approaches them? Teach them yet another social "script" in the hopes that they will not be beaten or tazed? Do we carefully select the areas we take them, even into adulthood?
I do. As we have been searching for safe, beach vacations, I know that I will avoid Tybee Island. We simply cannot take chances with places where the authority figures we have taught our son to seek out for help have demonstrated such a clear lack of understanding of his disability. I fear that even with training, the officers of Tybee Island will be anathema to the autism community for years to come.