.o47 x danny's birthday, colleges, grandparents
Alright, so, quite a bit has happened in the -- what, week? -- I haven't updated. Here's hoping I get it all out without rambling too much. Meh.
Sooo. I got my actual acceptance letter to Maryland the Saturday after I got the email. I was accepted to the University Honors program, too. No news on merit-based scholarships, but I checked the website today and it says acceptance letters come by March 1st and notification of merit-based scholarships starts coming in early March all the way through early April. So I guess we'll see. Since I got into University Honors, I know I at least stand a chance at being one of the candidates for the Banneker-Key Award... it'd be great to get that one, because the person chosen for the full Banneker-Key Award gets a full ride, books, room and board, everything. But we'll see. Any candidates for the award who get invited to the luncheon for it in spring are supposed to get some money, but only the overall winner gets the full ride.
We spent last weekend together, as usual... nothing especially spectacular happened, we just had our usual great time. All the way through Monday, which I had off for president's day or whatever. I went back to school Tuesday. I was supposed to tell Mrs. Washington, the senior administrator, about getting accepted to College Park, but I didn't. Why do I need it announced? I just told one or two of my friends. Chris, one of maybe three white boys at the school (and certainly the coolest of them), got in too and is already wearing a Terps jacket to school everyday. (For anyone who doesn't know, the UM mascot is a turtle and kids going to Maryland are called Terps.) Ashtony, the other white girl who got higher than a 1200 (on the 1600 scale) on the SAT and who's in line to be either valedictorian or salutatorian, also got in. And this other kid I don't really know -- I just remember him being on the Visit Maryland trip with a bunch of us. But we're the only four I know of so far at my school.
Tuesday we had what was my only Mock Trial practice before our first prosecution match... and Wednesday at the match we were steamrolled over by Bowie. I was a witness, but when we got to the actual match I was dying to be a lawyer so I could do something, anything, when the Bowie kids made objections we should have fought and didn't... and things like that. We lost horribly. I don't really mind since I don't want to win enough that we go on to the next level, but at the same time I'm a perfectionist and I hate getting stomped like that when I know there were things we could have done better. So from now on I'm a lawyer. They wanted me to be a lawyer all along, but I wasn't prepared to deal with objections, because I didn't know anything about them. But I read up on them in the Mock Trial guidebook we have, and I think I'll be okay.
One thing I learned from Bowie is to object loudly and often. If the other team doesn't know what it's doing, even objections that shouldn't make it through can. We play defense next, so we'll see how that works out. I hope I don't get up there and then suck as a lawyer despite all these feelings that I know what to do and blah blah blah.
Wednesday night I stayed at Danny's. We watched Mean Girls and drank because Thursday was his birthday... at mignight we did birthday shots. I got pretty drunk. Too drunk really for my comfort, but I was okay. I didn't break down in tears, haha. But I did get upset at one point, because I'd brought my dad's camera so Danny could play photographer and we ran out of time... I was saying something about it and he said, "Stop it, you're trying to make me feel guilty for not using the camera." It hurt because I never want to make him feel bad or guilty, and I knew it wasn't his fault -- there just wasn't time. There'll be other times, and hey, maybe another time I won't be on my period and I'll be able to look nicer. We'll see.
He opened his present and loved it because he knew about the scarf and that was all he expected, it was enough for him, but I got him a new toy for his Xbox too. And he liked his card. I cut it out so that it looked like the Batman symbol and opened up into a card.
We went to bed at three or so, and had to wake up at eight. When I woke up, I could still feel the alcohol. Not like actual drunkenness -- I was clear-headed except for that 'I just woke up' feeling -- but I had vertigo, I was wobbly when I stood and walked.
We collected Arthur (or Arthur collected us) and left at nine something or ten. Arthur hadn't ever been skiing before, like me, so we were in the same boat. Danny used to go all the time and has his own skis, though, so he's really good. We drove up to Ski Liberty just across the border of Pennsylvania. It was very warm, but there was plenty of snow. The place was almost empty, we didn't have to wait much at all. Basically conditions were exceptionally perfect. Danny kept saying we had no idea how lucky we were. Arthur and I rented skis, and we started on the little training hills and went progressively further.
I did really well at first. Arthur was the first to fall (getting off the first lift), but I fell plenty while I was there. I guess I was making up for when we went ice skating and I didn't fall at all, which was very disappointing for Danny. But yes, starting out I did better than Arthur. There are four skill levels: easy (green), medium (blue), and hard (black). I know that's only three, but when you get to the black diamonds, there's single, double, and (at some ski resorts, not this one) triple. So technically that makes four skill levels, since the double black diamond is insane. We stayed mostly on the blue slopes once we got acquainted with skiing, but at one point when we wanted to go back around front to get sodas, there were only two options: the green trail, which gets really flat at the end and is a pain in the ass to ski because you slow basically to a standstill and have to pole your way forward, or a black diamond. Arthur refused to go on the black diamond, so Danny and I went. I did fine -- I had a minor fall once, but made it the rest of the way with no problem.
Even though I had a lot of falls due to inexperience, they were no problem, didn't hurt at all. But there was one point when I was doing really well, skiing straight really fast -- Danny said about 40 miles an hour, but he tends toward exaggeration -- and my ski got caught in a snowboarder's groove in the snow. There was no time to think or stop or do anything, I just slammed into the snow and hurt my left arm something awful. Danny explained about snowboarding grooves -- he said they're very bad for skiiers, even experienced ones who don't notice a groove and hit it can't do anything but fall.
Toward the end I started getting tired and falling more because of it... which of course made me even more tired, especially when I got sick of freaking falling. That's when Arthur started doing better -- more endurance, I suppose. And I hated having them wait on me to get up and collect myself. I went as long as I could because I didn't want to be the one to say I wanted to leave, but finally I just had to go. Turned out to be good timing, though, because the after school crowds of people were beginning to roll in... and anyway, we'd been there five, maybe six hours.
It was a lot of fun, though. I'd do it again as long as I left when I was ready instead of waiting until I was fucking miserable.
So Thursday night when he took me home, I got home at nine and my parents were already asleep, which sucked because I needed to ask Dad if Danny could borrow his software book and I could have gotten a note from Mom to leave school at one rather than just leaving at one without telling her and getting in trouble for it. It was a function of time -- he needed to get home quickly, so had no time to go through the software book for individual things he might need, and I thought Dad was done with it so I just told Danny to take it. And school the next day -- Danny needed to be home by 2:30 to work on his computer with Justin, and then he and I needed to be at his grandparents' for dinner by 5:30, so it was just most reasonable for him to pick me up early. I don't have a fourth period on A Days, but it isn't official -- just an agreement with my teacher -- so Mom's told me I have to be at school during that period, unless I have her write me a note.
Anyway, so I was supposed to stay last night (Friday) at Danny's, and tonight too. I was supposed to go to a bar for the first time tonight, just because I have to go once to know what it's like (even though I really doubt I'll enjoy it). Yesterday, we went to dinner with Danny's grandparents, but right after we left the house my parents called to growl at me for taking the software and leaving school early, and told me I had to come home and I was on restriction. I felt horrible because they said I wouldn't get to see Danny for a while... but I told Danny everything that was going on and everything that they said, and we were both like, "It sucks, but it'll be okay." We pointed out the bright side points, like the fact that he split open his toe Thursday night and so really shouldn't be putting on shoes and waiting at bars for three hours, and we both need to do laundry, and he can fix his computer without worrying about me getting bored.
It wasn't too serious. I told my parents quite honestly and sincerely that I won't do it again. I mean, mostly it's because I don't want to risk being told I can't see Danny for any length of time whatsoever, but that's reason enough, because it means I definitely won't do it.
edit Anyway, my mom was going to let me finish our plans for the weekend and then just ground me the following week, but Danny had already left, so she said she'd just ground me for the weekend -- no going out except with the family. I asked if Danny could come over before work Sunday, and she said it'd be fine. (But no spending the night, which makes this the first weekend since that first football game we went to together that we haven't spent at least one night in the same bed.)
edit cont'd Soooo. Mom woke me up this morning (at like 11:30) with my acceptance letter from Guilford College in North Carolina. She'd opened it already and told me I got a $48,000 scholarship with a chance to try for $10,000 more, and although I was happy, I also went "Oh, shit," in my head because I have no money from Maryland (at least so far) and my parents are gonna pressure me to go to the school that offers me the most money. I'd really rather go to Maryland. Danny's a big part of it now, but it's more than that. I know the area here already, I know kids who're going to go to Maryland too, I know what I can major in there (no fucking clue what to major in at Guilford), and I fell in love with their Writer's House program when I went on Visit Maryland Day. Especially that last one. I mean, I'm not gonna lie and say Danny plays no part in it, but... I've been leaning toward Maryland ever since Visit Maryland Day. So whatever.
Danny keeps assuring me I'm a smart girl, I'll get enough money so I can afford to go to Maryland, and if I have to I can take out a student loan -- I'm a smart girl, he knows I'll make enough once I graduate to pay it off. It's sweet and supportive. Especially when I admit he's part of me preferring Maryland and he says he doesn't want it to be like that, but he does think Maryland would be better for me, because college is more than just learning -- and Maryland is a great school for learning -- it's also about the experience, and Greensboro is small.
This is the most honest way I can put it. If not for Danny, I wouldn't not want to go to Guilford, I just wouldn't prefer it. But with Danny, I don't really want to go there. It's a difference, but either way I prefer Maryland.
Blah. Anyway, I called my grandmother today because I felt like talking to her. I told her all about the college thing and skiing and junk. She kept saying how it sounds like Danny and I are getting really serious and even mentioning wedding-type stuff. It's weird to talk about. It's only been three and a half months. I mean, I can't see why we wouldn't last -- I love him so much, it's only gotten better, I can tell he feels the same -- but anything can happen and I know that. Especially when time to start college rolls around -- that's a lot of changes. But I'm not too worried, about college itself or about us. So whatever. Still, I always feel hesitant trying to think into the future. I mean, we practically live together on weekends, but I feel weird even thinking about actually living together. Maybe just because it's a long way off, for several reasons, not least of which being that we both live with our parents. It might happen, it might not. No point thinking about it, I guess.
I'm so tired. I guess that's it. I'm setting my alarm to get up and call Danny in the morning. I told him I'd do it. Haha. -evil grin- Not that early, though. Sooo, good night.
Sooo. I got my actual acceptance letter to Maryland the Saturday after I got the email. I was accepted to the University Honors program, too. No news on merit-based scholarships, but I checked the website today and it says acceptance letters come by March 1st and notification of merit-based scholarships starts coming in early March all the way through early April. So I guess we'll see. Since I got into University Honors, I know I at least stand a chance at being one of the candidates for the Banneker-Key Award... it'd be great to get that one, because the person chosen for the full Banneker-Key Award gets a full ride, books, room and board, everything. But we'll see. Any candidates for the award who get invited to the luncheon for it in spring are supposed to get some money, but only the overall winner gets the full ride.
We spent last weekend together, as usual... nothing especially spectacular happened, we just had our usual great time. All the way through Monday, which I had off for president's day or whatever. I went back to school Tuesday. I was supposed to tell Mrs. Washington, the senior administrator, about getting accepted to College Park, but I didn't. Why do I need it announced? I just told one or two of my friends. Chris, one of maybe three white boys at the school (and certainly the coolest of them), got in too and is already wearing a Terps jacket to school everyday. (For anyone who doesn't know, the UM mascot is a turtle and kids going to Maryland are called Terps.) Ashtony, the other white girl who got higher than a 1200 (on the 1600 scale) on the SAT and who's in line to be either valedictorian or salutatorian, also got in. And this other kid I don't really know -- I just remember him being on the Visit Maryland trip with a bunch of us. But we're the only four I know of so far at my school.
Tuesday we had what was my only Mock Trial practice before our first prosecution match... and Wednesday at the match we were steamrolled over by Bowie. I was a witness, but when we got to the actual match I was dying to be a lawyer so I could do something, anything, when the Bowie kids made objections we should have fought and didn't... and things like that. We lost horribly. I don't really mind since I don't want to win enough that we go on to the next level, but at the same time I'm a perfectionist and I hate getting stomped like that when I know there were things we could have done better. So from now on I'm a lawyer. They wanted me to be a lawyer all along, but I wasn't prepared to deal with objections, because I didn't know anything about them. But I read up on them in the Mock Trial guidebook we have, and I think I'll be okay.
One thing I learned from Bowie is to object loudly and often. If the other team doesn't know what it's doing, even objections that shouldn't make it through can. We play defense next, so we'll see how that works out. I hope I don't get up there and then suck as a lawyer despite all these feelings that I know what to do and blah blah blah.
Wednesday night I stayed at Danny's. We watched Mean Girls and drank because Thursday was his birthday... at mignight we did birthday shots. I got pretty drunk. Too drunk really for my comfort, but I was okay. I didn't break down in tears, haha. But I did get upset at one point, because I'd brought my dad's camera so Danny could play photographer and we ran out of time... I was saying something about it and he said, "Stop it, you're trying to make me feel guilty for not using the camera." It hurt because I never want to make him feel bad or guilty, and I knew it wasn't his fault -- there just wasn't time. There'll be other times, and hey, maybe another time I won't be on my period and I'll be able to look nicer. We'll see.
He opened his present and loved it because he knew about the scarf and that was all he expected, it was enough for him, but I got him a new toy for his Xbox too. And he liked his card. I cut it out so that it looked like the Batman symbol and opened up into a card.
We went to bed at three or so, and had to wake up at eight. When I woke up, I could still feel the alcohol. Not like actual drunkenness -- I was clear-headed except for that 'I just woke up' feeling -- but I had vertigo, I was wobbly when I stood and walked.
We collected Arthur (or Arthur collected us) and left at nine something or ten. Arthur hadn't ever been skiing before, like me, so we were in the same boat. Danny used to go all the time and has his own skis, though, so he's really good. We drove up to Ski Liberty just across the border of Pennsylvania. It was very warm, but there was plenty of snow. The place was almost empty, we didn't have to wait much at all. Basically conditions were exceptionally perfect. Danny kept saying we had no idea how lucky we were. Arthur and I rented skis, and we started on the little training hills and went progressively further.
I did really well at first. Arthur was the first to fall (getting off the first lift), but I fell plenty while I was there. I guess I was making up for when we went ice skating and I didn't fall at all, which was very disappointing for Danny. But yes, starting out I did better than Arthur. There are four skill levels: easy (green), medium (blue), and hard (black). I know that's only three, but when you get to the black diamonds, there's single, double, and (at some ski resorts, not this one) triple. So technically that makes four skill levels, since the double black diamond is insane. We stayed mostly on the blue slopes once we got acquainted with skiing, but at one point when we wanted to go back around front to get sodas, there were only two options: the green trail, which gets really flat at the end and is a pain in the ass to ski because you slow basically to a standstill and have to pole your way forward, or a black diamond. Arthur refused to go on the black diamond, so Danny and I went. I did fine -- I had a minor fall once, but made it the rest of the way with no problem.
Even though I had a lot of falls due to inexperience, they were no problem, didn't hurt at all. But there was one point when I was doing really well, skiing straight really fast -- Danny said about 40 miles an hour, but he tends toward exaggeration -- and my ski got caught in a snowboarder's groove in the snow. There was no time to think or stop or do anything, I just slammed into the snow and hurt my left arm something awful. Danny explained about snowboarding grooves -- he said they're very bad for skiiers, even experienced ones who don't notice a groove and hit it can't do anything but fall.
Toward the end I started getting tired and falling more because of it... which of course made me even more tired, especially when I got sick of freaking falling. That's when Arthur started doing better -- more endurance, I suppose. And I hated having them wait on me to get up and collect myself. I went as long as I could because I didn't want to be the one to say I wanted to leave, but finally I just had to go. Turned out to be good timing, though, because the after school crowds of people were beginning to roll in... and anyway, we'd been there five, maybe six hours.
It was a lot of fun, though. I'd do it again as long as I left when I was ready instead of waiting until I was fucking miserable.
So Thursday night when he took me home, I got home at nine and my parents were already asleep, which sucked because I needed to ask Dad if Danny could borrow his software book and I could have gotten a note from Mom to leave school at one rather than just leaving at one without telling her and getting in trouble for it. It was a function of time -- he needed to get home quickly, so had no time to go through the software book for individual things he might need, and I thought Dad was done with it so I just told Danny to take it. And school the next day -- Danny needed to be home by 2:30 to work on his computer with Justin, and then he and I needed to be at his grandparents' for dinner by 5:30, so it was just most reasonable for him to pick me up early. I don't have a fourth period on A Days, but it isn't official -- just an agreement with my teacher -- so Mom's told me I have to be at school during that period, unless I have her write me a note.
Anyway, so I was supposed to stay last night (Friday) at Danny's, and tonight too. I was supposed to go to a bar for the first time tonight, just because I have to go once to know what it's like (even though I really doubt I'll enjoy it). Yesterday, we went to dinner with Danny's grandparents, but right after we left the house my parents called to growl at me for taking the software and leaving school early, and told me I had to come home and I was on restriction. I felt horrible because they said I wouldn't get to see Danny for a while... but I told Danny everything that was going on and everything that they said, and we were both like, "It sucks, but it'll be okay." We pointed out the bright side points, like the fact that he split open his toe Thursday night and so really shouldn't be putting on shoes and waiting at bars for three hours, and we both need to do laundry, and he can fix his computer without worrying about me getting bored.
It wasn't too serious. I told my parents quite honestly and sincerely that I won't do it again. I mean, mostly it's because I don't want to risk being told I can't see Danny for any length of time whatsoever, but that's reason enough, because it means I definitely won't do it.
edit Anyway, my mom was going to let me finish our plans for the weekend and then just ground me the following week, but Danny had already left, so she said she'd just ground me for the weekend -- no going out except with the family. I asked if Danny could come over before work Sunday, and she said it'd be fine. (But no spending the night, which makes this the first weekend since that first football game we went to together that we haven't spent at least one night in the same bed.)
edit cont'd Soooo. Mom woke me up this morning (at like 11:30) with my acceptance letter from Guilford College in North Carolina. She'd opened it already and told me I got a $48,000 scholarship with a chance to try for $10,000 more, and although I was happy, I also went "Oh, shit," in my head because I have no money from Maryland (at least so far) and my parents are gonna pressure me to go to the school that offers me the most money. I'd really rather go to Maryland. Danny's a big part of it now, but it's more than that. I know the area here already, I know kids who're going to go to Maryland too, I know what I can major in there (no fucking clue what to major in at Guilford), and I fell in love with their Writer's House program when I went on Visit Maryland Day. Especially that last one. I mean, I'm not gonna lie and say Danny plays no part in it, but... I've been leaning toward Maryland ever since Visit Maryland Day. So whatever.
Danny keeps assuring me I'm a smart girl, I'll get enough money so I can afford to go to Maryland, and if I have to I can take out a student loan -- I'm a smart girl, he knows I'll make enough once I graduate to pay it off. It's sweet and supportive. Especially when I admit he's part of me preferring Maryland and he says he doesn't want it to be like that, but he does think Maryland would be better for me, because college is more than just learning -- and Maryland is a great school for learning -- it's also about the experience, and Greensboro is small.
This is the most honest way I can put it. If not for Danny, I wouldn't not want to go to Guilford, I just wouldn't prefer it. But with Danny, I don't really want to go there. It's a difference, but either way I prefer Maryland.
Blah. Anyway, I called my grandmother today because I felt like talking to her. I told her all about the college thing and skiing and junk. She kept saying how it sounds like Danny and I are getting really serious and even mentioning wedding-type stuff. It's weird to talk about. It's only been three and a half months. I mean, I can't see why we wouldn't last -- I love him so much, it's only gotten better, I can tell he feels the same -- but anything can happen and I know that. Especially when time to start college rolls around -- that's a lot of changes. But I'm not too worried, about college itself or about us. So whatever. Still, I always feel hesitant trying to think into the future. I mean, we practically live together on weekends, but I feel weird even thinking about actually living together. Maybe just because it's a long way off, for several reasons, not least of which being that we both live with our parents. It might happen, it might not. No point thinking about it, I guess.
I'm so tired. I guess that's it. I'm setting my alarm to get up and call Danny in the morning. I told him I'd do it. Haha. -evil grin- Not that early, though. Sooo, good night.