(no subject)
An emo man i know wrote this
Dear "Emos" and other emotional types,
In a society that has turned from 100% "gangster" fad to 100 % "emo" fad in the past couple years, it is indispensable that your kind be helped and assisted so that no more crying over broken heartedness occurs in this era of unrequited love. This emotional outburst that many people are having is rather disturbing. Not only do these outbursts impede the enhancement of our society, but also prevent the pursuit of happiness we should all strive for. How can one be elated if all they think about is how they can not have a certain significant other? Thus, in order to solve the problems of "emos" we have to strike the root of the problem: the desire to have a significant other.
Society, over time, has created such a rule that if you or I do not follow it, then we shall be ostracized from society. This miserable and despicable rule is the necessity to have a partner in life. We just need to go to school to see that we are a minority in civilization because we are not holding hands with our love. Thus, in order to save our species from extinction, we must create new etiquettes that allow individuals to concentrate on other things in life rather than just having a significant other.
One way to impose this new social order is by making relationships nonexistent. Outlawing couples and marriages will prevent people from forming these disastrous unions. This should not be so hard to accomplish considering that the divorce rate is 50%. Just have people put some more effort and it will soon reach 100%. With no stress to have a significant other or desire to find love, people will be much happier with their lives. All in all, the world will become a much better place and your peoples' "emo" qualities will be eradicated.
Change, however, does not come quickly and most of the times does not occur. Therefore, we must come with short term plans to stop the emo plague from taking over the world. There is a general pattern if we examine the problems of "emos": they utterly fail in reeling in someone they adore. Basically, you guys can not get any game. So, if there were programs to help your people get game, then you would not become emo. Thus, I propose love doctors such as in the movie Hitch to help the failures get the love that they want.
Unfortunately, there will always be a group that I shall label as the "not assist able" because they are in fact not assist able. For these hapless few, here is my recommendation: continue on with your suffering. You are joke to human beings and should die for your inability to survive and adapt. You shall succumb to your "emonesss" and fall prey to the dark void that awaits you. You will thrash about your things because of your futility to get rid of the state you are in. In the end, people will be glad when they have been rid of you and your sad ambience. After reading this tirade, you failures should have so much shame that you should fight against your issues and prove me wrong, or else you really do deserve a miserable fate.
There are many reasons as to why emo people are emo. Love is not the only source of pain. However, it is the most potent one because the heart is a fragile part of our body and if broken the slightest bit, the whole soul gets affected gravely. Do not try to fall in love or you'll pay for it dearly. Thus, emo people, fix your problems, rid society of your sadness, help your people from extinction, and save yourselves from miserable lives. No one wants to be emo and hopefully this letter conveys to you how to cure your ailments. You live life only once, should you not then live it to the fullest then?
- A Happy Go Lucky Person
Dear "Emos" and other emotional types,
In a society that has turned from 100% "gangster" fad to 100 % "emo" fad in the past couple years, it is indispensable that your kind be helped and assisted so that no more crying over broken heartedness occurs in this era of unrequited love. This emotional outburst that many people are having is rather disturbing. Not only do these outbursts impede the enhancement of our society, but also prevent the pursuit of happiness we should all strive for. How can one be elated if all they think about is how they can not have a certain significant other? Thus, in order to solve the problems of "emos" we have to strike the root of the problem: the desire to have a significant other.
Society, over time, has created such a rule that if you or I do not follow it, then we shall be ostracized from society. This miserable and despicable rule is the necessity to have a partner in life. We just need to go to school to see that we are a minority in civilization because we are not holding hands with our love. Thus, in order to save our species from extinction, we must create new etiquettes that allow individuals to concentrate on other things in life rather than just having a significant other.
One way to impose this new social order is by making relationships nonexistent. Outlawing couples and marriages will prevent people from forming these disastrous unions. This should not be so hard to accomplish considering that the divorce rate is 50%. Just have people put some more effort and it will soon reach 100%. With no stress to have a significant other or desire to find love, people will be much happier with their lives. All in all, the world will become a much better place and your peoples' "emo" qualities will be eradicated.
Change, however, does not come quickly and most of the times does not occur. Therefore, we must come with short term plans to stop the emo plague from taking over the world. There is a general pattern if we examine the problems of "emos": they utterly fail in reeling in someone they adore. Basically, you guys can not get any game. So, if there were programs to help your people get game, then you would not become emo. Thus, I propose love doctors such as in the movie Hitch to help the failures get the love that they want.
Unfortunately, there will always be a group that I shall label as the "not assist able" because they are in fact not assist able. For these hapless few, here is my recommendation: continue on with your suffering. You are joke to human beings and should die for your inability to survive and adapt. You shall succumb to your "emonesss" and fall prey to the dark void that awaits you. You will thrash about your things because of your futility to get rid of the state you are in. In the end, people will be glad when they have been rid of you and your sad ambience. After reading this tirade, you failures should have so much shame that you should fight against your issues and prove me wrong, or else you really do deserve a miserable fate.
There are many reasons as to why emo people are emo. Love is not the only source of pain. However, it is the most potent one because the heart is a fragile part of our body and if broken the slightest bit, the whole soul gets affected gravely. Do not try to fall in love or you'll pay for it dearly. Thus, emo people, fix your problems, rid society of your sadness, help your people from extinction, and save yourselves from miserable lives. No one wants to be emo and hopefully this letter conveys to you how to cure your ailments. You live life only once, should you not then live it to the fullest then?
- A Happy Go Lucky Person