[TWBI] Porch
Title: Porch
Series: That Would Be Illogical
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Rating: PG13
Length: 1,098
Pairing: Kirk/Spock
Summary: This is not the first illogical action I have ever participated in because of James Tiberius Kirk. I doubt it will be the last. Masterlist
Previous: Child at Heart
I have a substantial amount of patience. Even when compared to other Vulcans, who in actuality have little tolerance for illogical or emotional beings. I believe it developed by being in almost constant company with humans. I do not think it would be incorrect to say that it was a very large factor in my success as a First Officer to a very impulsive Captain. A Captain who thought logic was synonymous with boring and attempted to do the most outrageous things for no other reason than that it "seemed like a good idea at the time." Yes, my patience withstood many years with him.
But at the moment, Jim is wearing my patience very thin.
I snatch the wooden stick from his hands and continue walking up the stone path.
He looks at me shocked. "You can't just take away an old man's cane!"
I stop and turn to him, giving a small frown. "You do not need it. You are more than capable of walking without aid."
He glares back at me.
"If you insist on brandishing this cane like an inebriated, rapier-carrying Sulu, I will no longer allow you to carry one," I warn.
He pouts but it does not affect me quite like it once did. He huffs. "That used to work a lot better when I was younger. Don't tell me I'm not cute anymore."
"You were neva cute," Leonard retorts from the porch of his house, rocking in his chair and sipping from a mint julep.
Jim turns and scowls at him. "I was incredibly cute!" He turns back to me. "Wasn't I Spock?"
I raise an eyebrow but before I can respond the former doctor interjects. "You can't ask a Vulcan 'bout what's cute. They wouldn' know cute if it jumped up an' slapped him in the face."
"I could say the same of you concerning reason and logic, doctor," I say dryly.
Leonard gives a small growl. "Why you little green-blooded-" he started.
"Ah!" Jim sighed jovially as he collapses back into a rocking chair near the doctor. "Just like back on the Enterprise," he says nostalgically.
We both raise an eyebrow to him.
Jim looks back and forth between us. "What's with you two and your weird eyebrow powers?"
Our eyebrows only rise higher. Leonard soon rolls his eyes. "What the hell are you talkin' 'bout?"
"It's like the only thing you two have in common," he points out. "Besides having an awesome, adorable friend, of course."
Leonard groans. "Nobody thinks that you're either of those thin's," he snaps.
"Aw," Joanna says as she walks out onto the porch from the house. "I think you're very awesome and adorable, Uncle Jim."
He beams at her.
Leonard groans. "Don' encourage the man, Jo."
Jim grins at him. "You should listen to your daughter more, Bones. She's a very intelligent woman."
"An' you're a right pain in my ass."
"Dad!"
He scowls and gives a dismissive gesture. "Don' go scoldin' me, child. Now, go get these people a drink. Jim's more bearable when he's had some booze in him."
"Allow me to assist you," I say and follow her into the house. "I find the same occurs when Leonard imbibes alcohol." I ignore the shout from the doctor.
We enter the kitchen and she smiles at me as she opens the liquor cabinet. "How have my two favorite uncles been?"
I give a small nod. "We have been very well, thank you."
She smiles to herself. The resemblance to her father is rather remarkable. She looks much like Leonard did at forty. She has a round face and brown hair beginning to gray and very tired expression. She also became a doctor in Starfleet. The only major difference is that her personality is quite pleasant while his… is not.
"They haven't changed much," she comments.
The corner of my lips twitches up. "No, they have not."
"I remember when Jim was captain and dad was CMO of the Enterprise," she says. "I would visit sometimes. You remember, right?"
"I do."
"I always thought Jim was so silly," she confesses as she grabs two of the newly made drinks and hands them to me. "He always made me giggle. Dad always sort of hated it but also sort of loved it since he was glad to see me laugh." She grabs the other two and we walk back to the front of the house.
"I envy you, Bones," I hear Jim say as we exit the house and I move to stand beside him.
"Why's that?" he grunts.
"You have the crotchety, old man thing down pat."
Leonard scowls and throws the sprig of mint from his glass, hitting Jim in the side of the head and landing on his shoulder.
"Actually," he continues, ignoring the doctor's assault. "You've had it down for years. You've been grumpy as long as I've known you."
"You've been an idiot as long as I've known you," he grumbles.
Jim sighs. "Love you too, Bones." He looks up at me and grins. "Oh, Spock. Don't worry, I love you more."
"I was not worried," I assure him as I hand him his drink. "I do not perceive Leonard as a threat in any way."
Leonard grumbles but does not appear to actually say any distinguishable.
"If you could repeat that, doctor?" I ask, amusement plain in my voice.
"I don' think you'd really want me to, hobgoblin."
"We should play a game," Jim says.
Leonard snorts. "Like what?"
He thinks a moment. "Shuffleboard."
"Shuffleboard?" Joanna asks, confused.
"Shuffle- Jim, what the hell is the matter with you? Just because we're old as hell doesn' mean we gotta do boring shit."
"We also do not have the proper equipment," I point out.
"This is all your fault," the doctor says, pointing at me. "You never discourage him. You can't say 'no' to this kid, can you?"
"Hey!" Jim says defensively. "I'm not a kid. I'm an old man trying to live out the twilight years of my life by reminiscing and doing weird not-fun things but making them seem fun because I'm dead inside."
Leonard stares. "You make less and less sense with every word that comes out o' your mouth, you know that?"
"Horseshoes," he suddenly blurts out.
He glares at him for a long time before grunting and standing up. "Fine, but only so you don' suggest somethin' more asinine."
"Like pushing a wheel down a dirt path with a stick?" Joanna suggests.
"Ooo!"
Leonard knocks Jim on the side of the head. "No."
Next: Heat Stroke
Series: That Would Be Illogical
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Rating: PG13
Length: 1,098
Pairing: Kirk/Spock
Summary: This is not the first illogical action I have ever participated in because of James Tiberius Kirk. I doubt it will be the last. Masterlist
Previous: Child at Heart
I have a substantial amount of patience. Even when compared to other Vulcans, who in actuality have little tolerance for illogical or emotional beings. I believe it developed by being in almost constant company with humans. I do not think it would be incorrect to say that it was a very large factor in my success as a First Officer to a very impulsive Captain. A Captain who thought logic was synonymous with boring and attempted to do the most outrageous things for no other reason than that it "seemed like a good idea at the time." Yes, my patience withstood many years with him.
But at the moment, Jim is wearing my patience very thin.
I snatch the wooden stick from his hands and continue walking up the stone path.
He looks at me shocked. "You can't just take away an old man's cane!"
I stop and turn to him, giving a small frown. "You do not need it. You are more than capable of walking without aid."
He glares back at me.
"If you insist on brandishing this cane like an inebriated, rapier-carrying Sulu, I will no longer allow you to carry one," I warn.
He pouts but it does not affect me quite like it once did. He huffs. "That used to work a lot better when I was younger. Don't tell me I'm not cute anymore."
"You were neva cute," Leonard retorts from the porch of his house, rocking in his chair and sipping from a mint julep.
Jim turns and scowls at him. "I was incredibly cute!" He turns back to me. "Wasn't I Spock?"
I raise an eyebrow but before I can respond the former doctor interjects. "You can't ask a Vulcan 'bout what's cute. They wouldn' know cute if it jumped up an' slapped him in the face."
"I could say the same of you concerning reason and logic, doctor," I say dryly.
Leonard gives a small growl. "Why you little green-blooded-" he started.
"Ah!" Jim sighed jovially as he collapses back into a rocking chair near the doctor. "Just like back on the Enterprise," he says nostalgically.
We both raise an eyebrow to him.
Jim looks back and forth between us. "What's with you two and your weird eyebrow powers?"
Our eyebrows only rise higher. Leonard soon rolls his eyes. "What the hell are you talkin' 'bout?"
"It's like the only thing you two have in common," he points out. "Besides having an awesome, adorable friend, of course."
Leonard groans. "Nobody thinks that you're either of those thin's," he snaps.
"Aw," Joanna says as she walks out onto the porch from the house. "I think you're very awesome and adorable, Uncle Jim."
He beams at her.
Leonard groans. "Don' encourage the man, Jo."
Jim grins at him. "You should listen to your daughter more, Bones. She's a very intelligent woman."
"An' you're a right pain in my ass."
"Dad!"
He scowls and gives a dismissive gesture. "Don' go scoldin' me, child. Now, go get these people a drink. Jim's more bearable when he's had some booze in him."
"Allow me to assist you," I say and follow her into the house. "I find the same occurs when Leonard imbibes alcohol." I ignore the shout from the doctor.
We enter the kitchen and she smiles at me as she opens the liquor cabinet. "How have my two favorite uncles been?"
I give a small nod. "We have been very well, thank you."
She smiles to herself. The resemblance to her father is rather remarkable. She looks much like Leonard did at forty. She has a round face and brown hair beginning to gray and very tired expression. She also became a doctor in Starfleet. The only major difference is that her personality is quite pleasant while his… is not.
"They haven't changed much," she comments.
The corner of my lips twitches up. "No, they have not."
"I remember when Jim was captain and dad was CMO of the Enterprise," she says. "I would visit sometimes. You remember, right?"
"I do."
"I always thought Jim was so silly," she confesses as she grabs two of the newly made drinks and hands them to me. "He always made me giggle. Dad always sort of hated it but also sort of loved it since he was glad to see me laugh." She grabs the other two and we walk back to the front of the house.
"I envy you, Bones," I hear Jim say as we exit the house and I move to stand beside him.
"Why's that?" he grunts.
"You have the crotchety, old man thing down pat."
Leonard scowls and throws the sprig of mint from his glass, hitting Jim in the side of the head and landing on his shoulder.
"Actually," he continues, ignoring the doctor's assault. "You've had it down for years. You've been grumpy as long as I've known you."
"You've been an idiot as long as I've known you," he grumbles.
Jim sighs. "Love you too, Bones." He looks up at me and grins. "Oh, Spock. Don't worry, I love you more."
"I was not worried," I assure him as I hand him his drink. "I do not perceive Leonard as a threat in any way."
Leonard grumbles but does not appear to actually say any distinguishable.
"If you could repeat that, doctor?" I ask, amusement plain in my voice.
"I don' think you'd really want me to, hobgoblin."
"We should play a game," Jim says.
Leonard snorts. "Like what?"
He thinks a moment. "Shuffleboard."
"Shuffleboard?" Joanna asks, confused.
"Shuffle- Jim, what the hell is the matter with you? Just because we're old as hell doesn' mean we gotta do boring shit."
"We also do not have the proper equipment," I point out.
"This is all your fault," the doctor says, pointing at me. "You never discourage him. You can't say 'no' to this kid, can you?"
"Hey!" Jim says defensively. "I'm not a kid. I'm an old man trying to live out the twilight years of my life by reminiscing and doing weird not-fun things but making them seem fun because I'm dead inside."
Leonard stares. "You make less and less sense with every word that comes out o' your mouth, you know that?"
"Horseshoes," he suddenly blurts out.
He glares at him for a long time before grunting and standing up. "Fine, but only so you don' suggest somethin' more asinine."
"Like pushing a wheel down a dirt path with a stick?" Joanna suggests.
"Ooo!"
Leonard knocks Jim on the side of the head. "No."
Next: Heat Stroke