Tomorrow
"The wind of change is blowing, prepare for the worst prey for the best." -Mike
When this year started I made a resolution to myself that things would change, it is almost 10 months deep and things feel almost the same. It is not because I haven’t changed it is mostly because none most of the issues that I had are still present in my life plus there are more complications piling on. Whatever the case I won't falter on the promise to myself. I guess I should start by getting stuff off my chest. So this will be one of those days where I empty my soul into this website and well what happens from this point on, I will accept responsibility for the words on this page. Lets get started.
I have had friends that I have known for years I mean who doesn’t? The more I look at it is the more that I see that a lot of the friends that I had aren’t really friends any more. Prime examples are Alan and Mikgo. They are both good people don't get me wrong but I guess they don't have very good friendship skills. I mean I looked at my caller id today to see that last time I got a call from them and I realize that I haven’t. The only reason I hear form them is because I call. I mean every once in a blue moon I get an im but I mean I remember when we actually did things. Now it is like I don’t really exist to them. I feel that I am part of things because I was there in the beginning but I really am not in the loop. Sometimes it saddens me to see that we came so far only to neglect each other now. The funny part is that Mikgo proclaims how she wants us all to hang out like we used to but she never makes a move to make this happen.
I guess I must take the jump to who I thought would be my newest friends that would be Audry, I mean things where cool at first. Then you turned and spit venom on my name. As far as you and Jon are concerned what you two do to each other is not my problem. All I ever asked of you is to give me a reason why you would verbally assault me in that manner. Now I got it, it was not you it was Mary. You claim to be suffering from MPD. After you broke my respect and violated my trust you turn around and insult my intellect as well. That is the last lie I am going to take from you. Audry ... you are not even worth the shit that comes out your own ass crack. I bet you don't even know the first thing about MPD. You are nothing more than a little scared bitch that can't fess up to her own stupidity, so insecure that you migrate from one dick to another so you can fell adequate. Bitch don't you realize that you are not even qualified to be weekend pussy. So with all of that said you call you two faced, backstabbing, stagatory raping, boyfriend, that you are only going to fuck; lie about; then dump, and cry your eyes out. Don't cry to hard though because the people around you need that air you are wasting more then you do. Then after you and Wayne don't work, take you diabetic needle that is you stomach and jam it into your neck and do us all a great justice. Enjoy your life.
Man I think that it is really silly that you locked up your journal the way to did. I mean you talk to me and Shannon on a daily basis anyway so if it set up that only Shannon and I can read it is kind of pointless. Then blocking Audry was just another pussy move. I mean who cares if she comments. Anyway I really don't have bone to pick with you other than the fact you seem to eat money. Not buy food and eat, I mean just eat the money. Damn you are in dire need of a money management class. But alas we all have our flaws. I mean no disrespect we are down. No doubt you have my respect and my trust. Stay safe and well... muah! LOL.
Four girls man, I never thought that I would see you being a player. It really doesn’t fit you. I mean I thought you where better than that. I mean I guess you went to find your self and you found it. I really don't like the person Isee these days. You remind me off all the guys at Norland that we hated. Talk about your 180's. Be careful man.
Now you. Damn girl you have no idea how much I love you. Now it comes to light that you infact love me but you are afraid that you may get hurt again. You don't want things to change. All I can say is that as long as you are alive in this world you as well as everyone else are all slave to change. All we can do is try to make things change to our benefit. I know deep down in side you want to give it a try so why to you keep fighting your self. Don't worry about what you are capable of. Stop thinking about what could go wrong and start thinking about what could go right. I mean I have been pulling for you for fives years. I have always been in your corner so don't dismiss me now. Talk to me. If I am missing something then come tell me. This sick game has to end somewhere. So lets end it together. The only think I know is that our history is so imposable in the way it all happened that we had to be meant for something more than friendship. Just open up to me and we will work it out form there. Much love.
Damn I fell so much better for getting this all off my chest.
Good night all
-Michael a.k.a Mikey b.k.a. Kenru
P.S. ALL COMMENTS WELCOME
When this year started I made a resolution to myself that things would change, it is almost 10 months deep and things feel almost the same. It is not because I haven’t changed it is mostly because none most of the issues that I had are still present in my life plus there are more complications piling on. Whatever the case I won't falter on the promise to myself. I guess I should start by getting stuff off my chest. So this will be one of those days where I empty my soul into this website and well what happens from this point on, I will accept responsibility for the words on this page. Lets get started.
I have had friends that I have known for years I mean who doesn’t? The more I look at it is the more that I see that a lot of the friends that I had aren’t really friends any more. Prime examples are Alan and Mikgo. They are both good people don't get me wrong but I guess they don't have very good friendship skills. I mean I looked at my caller id today to see that last time I got a call from them and I realize that I haven’t. The only reason I hear form them is because I call. I mean every once in a blue moon I get an im but I mean I remember when we actually did things. Now it is like I don’t really exist to them. I feel that I am part of things because I was there in the beginning but I really am not in the loop. Sometimes it saddens me to see that we came so far only to neglect each other now. The funny part is that Mikgo proclaims how she wants us all to hang out like we used to but she never makes a move to make this happen.
I guess I must take the jump to who I thought would be my newest friends that would be Audry, I mean things where cool at first. Then you turned and spit venom on my name. As far as you and Jon are concerned what you two do to each other is not my problem. All I ever asked of you is to give me a reason why you would verbally assault me in that manner. Now I got it, it was not you it was Mary. You claim to be suffering from MPD. After you broke my respect and violated my trust you turn around and insult my intellect as well. That is the last lie I am going to take from you. Audry ... you are not even worth the shit that comes out your own ass crack. I bet you don't even know the first thing about MPD. You are nothing more than a little scared bitch that can't fess up to her own stupidity, so insecure that you migrate from one dick to another so you can fell adequate. Bitch don't you realize that you are not even qualified to be weekend pussy. So with all of that said you call you two faced, backstabbing, stagatory raping, boyfriend, that you are only going to fuck; lie about; then dump, and cry your eyes out. Don't cry to hard though because the people around you need that air you are wasting more then you do. Then after you and Wayne don't work, take you diabetic needle that is you stomach and jam it into your neck and do us all a great justice. Enjoy your life.
Man I think that it is really silly that you locked up your journal the way to did. I mean you talk to me and Shannon on a daily basis anyway so if it set up that only Shannon and I can read it is kind of pointless. Then blocking Audry was just another pussy move. I mean who cares if she comments. Anyway I really don't have bone to pick with you other than the fact you seem to eat money. Not buy food and eat, I mean just eat the money. Damn you are in dire need of a money management class. But alas we all have our flaws. I mean no disrespect we are down. No doubt you have my respect and my trust. Stay safe and well... muah! LOL.
Four girls man, I never thought that I would see you being a player. It really doesn’t fit you. I mean I thought you where better than that. I mean I guess you went to find your self and you found it. I really don't like the person Isee these days. You remind me off all the guys at Norland that we hated. Talk about your 180's. Be careful man.
Now you. Damn girl you have no idea how much I love you. Now it comes to light that you infact love me but you are afraid that you may get hurt again. You don't want things to change. All I can say is that as long as you are alive in this world you as well as everyone else are all slave to change. All we can do is try to make things change to our benefit. I know deep down in side you want to give it a try so why to you keep fighting your self. Don't worry about what you are capable of. Stop thinking about what could go wrong and start thinking about what could go right. I mean I have been pulling for you for fives years. I have always been in your corner so don't dismiss me now. Talk to me. If I am missing something then come tell me. This sick game has to end somewhere. So lets end it together. The only think I know is that our history is so imposable in the way it all happened that we had to be meant for something more than friendship. Just open up to me and we will work it out form there. Much love.
Damn I fell so much better for getting this all off my chest.
Good night all
-Michael a.k.a Mikey b.k.a. Kenru
P.S. ALL COMMENTS WELCOME