Fucked Up Dream
Me, my mom, my sister, and Alex went to England to visit my aunt, uncle, and cousin before they moved back to the States. The entire flight, I was telling Alex about my prior trip to England and he was so excited to be there with me.
Now, for some reason, what I explained to Alex was definitely NOT what happened last time I went. What I really did: hung out with my family cuz I was 14 and couldn't do shit by myself. It was fun, but it's not what I told Alex I did, which was go to a fucking house party and get drunk and make friends with a cute British boy. Oh, and I wasn't 14 when I did it, I was closer to 17.
But now I'm 25 and we're going again and we land and we get picked up by one of my aunt's friends cuz something came up, and then we went to my aunt's house visited with everyone and I showed Alex around and then my cute British friend called. He was having another house party and wanted me to bring Alex.
We went to the house party and it was a blast. The cute British boy looked like a blonde version of Charlieissocoollike but without the mole. He didn't sound as annoying as Charlie though, he sounded more like Necroscope86, all deep-voiced and sexy. And me and Alex got really drunk and he was flirting with some cute girl and I was sitting by my cute friend and he was asking me about all sorts of shit that hadn't mattered in years - apparently when I was there the first time I'd been having some drama with a boy I liked, Robby (which is legit, I did have some drama with Robby, but this was 2-ish years AFTER I went to England so that's why I know how old I was) and he wanted to know what happened.
I told him the whole story (which is just high school drama not worth repeating) and we laughed heartily and then I snuggled in his lap and he's like, "So, where are you staying tonight?" and I said, "It depends." "Depends on what?" he slurred. "Depends on what you're making for breakfast."
He just stared at me and laughed and said "Kenz, your husband is RIGHT OVER THERE," and he turned to look and Alex was totally making out with the cute girl and I started cackling cuz my cute boy's face was priceless. Then he looked at me and blinked and then we started making out and my alarm clock went off.
Apparently Alex and I are swinging floozies when we're drunk. And wtf kinda pickup line was that?! Like the female version of "How do you like your eggs in the morning, scrambled or fertilized?" or some shit. Ugh, if this is what I dream about then I'm not surprised I didn't have more boyfriends. I am a DWEEB.
And why this made-up British boy? He was cute, yeah, but he wasn't what I'd consider gorgeous. He wasn't even my type, being all blonde and shit. I'm a sucker for brunets with brown eyes. Alex is an anachronism. So I dunno.
Stupid brain.
Now, for some reason, what I explained to Alex was definitely NOT what happened last time I went. What I really did: hung out with my family cuz I was 14 and couldn't do shit by myself. It was fun, but it's not what I told Alex I did, which was go to a fucking house party and get drunk and make friends with a cute British boy. Oh, and I wasn't 14 when I did it, I was closer to 17.
But now I'm 25 and we're going again and we land and we get picked up by one of my aunt's friends cuz something came up, and then we went to my aunt's house visited with everyone and I showed Alex around and then my cute British friend called. He was having another house party and wanted me to bring Alex.
We went to the house party and it was a blast. The cute British boy looked like a blonde version of Charlieissocoollike but without the mole. He didn't sound as annoying as Charlie though, he sounded more like Necroscope86, all deep-voiced and sexy. And me and Alex got really drunk and he was flirting with some cute girl and I was sitting by my cute friend and he was asking me about all sorts of shit that hadn't mattered in years - apparently when I was there the first time I'd been having some drama with a boy I liked, Robby (which is legit, I did have some drama with Robby, but this was 2-ish years AFTER I went to England so that's why I know how old I was) and he wanted to know what happened.
I told him the whole story (which is just high school drama not worth repeating) and we laughed heartily and then I snuggled in his lap and he's like, "So, where are you staying tonight?" and I said, "It depends." "Depends on what?" he slurred. "Depends on what you're making for breakfast."
He just stared at me and laughed and said "Kenz, your husband is RIGHT OVER THERE," and he turned to look and Alex was totally making out with the cute girl and I started cackling cuz my cute boy's face was priceless. Then he looked at me and blinked and then we started making out and my alarm clock went off.
Apparently Alex and I are swinging floozies when we're drunk. And wtf kinda pickup line was that?! Like the female version of "How do you like your eggs in the morning, scrambled or fertilized?" or some shit. Ugh, if this is what I dream about then I'm not surprised I didn't have more boyfriends. I am a DWEEB.
And why this made-up British boy? He was cute, yeah, but he wasn't what I'd consider gorgeous. He wasn't even my type, being all blonde and shit. I'm a sucker for brunets with brown eyes. Alex is an anachronism. So I dunno.
Stupid brain.