Well it started out down a dirty road, started out all alone
So... I no longer have wisdom teeth, and now I look like a chipmunk.
I'm a little confused as to what I'm doing but all in all I'm happy. I'm looking forward to New Zealand... I'll admit I'm in denial, I haven't dealt with what its going to be like or what I'm going to do when I get there but I still have a month to prepare for that. I've decided to go on the light side. I'm only going to bring my backpacking backpack, one large bag and a bag with my computer and other important paperwork. Minimal clothing and other accessories. My most prized possessions while I'm there will be photos and my bear. I'm going to try to only bring stuff that I wont care if it gets ruined or lost and then if I need other stuff I'll buy it there. But I've realized that having too much stuff can be very stressful and that's something I don't want to deal with there.
I can't help but feeling like this is going to be an experience of a lifetime and I can't waste a single moment. But I think I need to just relax and enjoy the moments while I'm there because rushing around trying to see everything will make it less fun. And plus, I could get a change to go back too. There are always opportunities.
Of course, I've been thinking about something else a lot too. Its confusing... the distance always makes it that way. Its like I have a blocker for it, I don't let myself in too deep because I'm terrified that it'll hurt too badly to miss someone that much. So I just push it to the back of my head and focus on how I can have a good time where I am with the people I'm with. Something I think is a good idea, its actually healthy too. I'm willing to leave the rest to fate I guess, not that I think I can just let it run its course. I will have to work on it, but all in moderation, in order to stay sane.
Waiting is the hardest part.
I'm a little confused as to what I'm doing but all in all I'm happy. I'm looking forward to New Zealand... I'll admit I'm in denial, I haven't dealt with what its going to be like or what I'm going to do when I get there but I still have a month to prepare for that. I've decided to go on the light side. I'm only going to bring my backpacking backpack, one large bag and a bag with my computer and other important paperwork. Minimal clothing and other accessories. My most prized possessions while I'm there will be photos and my bear. I'm going to try to only bring stuff that I wont care if it gets ruined or lost and then if I need other stuff I'll buy it there. But I've realized that having too much stuff can be very stressful and that's something I don't want to deal with there.
I can't help but feeling like this is going to be an experience of a lifetime and I can't waste a single moment. But I think I need to just relax and enjoy the moments while I'm there because rushing around trying to see everything will make it less fun. And plus, I could get a change to go back too. There are always opportunities.
Of course, I've been thinking about something else a lot too. Its confusing... the distance always makes it that way. Its like I have a blocker for it, I don't let myself in too deep because I'm terrified that it'll hurt too badly to miss someone that much. So I just push it to the back of my head and focus on how I can have a good time where I am with the people I'm with. Something I think is a good idea, its actually healthy too. I'm willing to leave the rest to fate I guess, not that I think I can just let it run its course. I will have to work on it, but all in moderation, in order to stay sane.
Waiting is the hardest part.