Not much...
... but I am once again back to my semi-usual "oh my God, my head is full of STUFF" modus, which is a little reassuring -- I was starting to wonder if I was turning into one of those boring old people, who doesn't have any interesting hobbies and just putters around all the time not accomplishing anything.
Apparently, fortunately, NOT.
(I've been coming home and watching TV and not having Any Energy At All, which has been really really frustrating, because NONE OF THE THINGS I WANT TO DO GET DONE.)
That said, with what is my head full?
Suddenly I'm not quite sure...
No, no. It's stuff like...
Work Stuff
Work is going well but still boring because my manager hasn't had time to review anything I've given her in the last month. I'm reluctant to do more work that's only going to sit on her desk and feel even more overwhelming to her and is mostly make-work anyway because we're still sort of feeling our way around what my job is, now that I'm actually allowed to do it. So that's a little frustrating, because I like being busy and productive.
Also, all of my other managers eventually got to the point where they would at least throw me their own work for first cuts, so they'd have more time to review the copious amounts of work I was producing, but this one won't delegate anything, so she's got even less time than usual, not to mention that we're three managers down for the foreseeable future, and Just Argh.
In addition to which, stuff is more than usually on hold because we're waiting so we can incorporate audit and division reorg results, and I'd be FINE with that, but I've I've only got six weeks or so until I go on maternity leave, and I would LIKE to have things set up so I can hit the ground running when I get back in mid-January, which I can't do right now, because nobody will give me any feedback. I should have a new super-boss by then, which is great -- but let's have things prepped so we can present a coherent vision which they can yay or nay or modify. I mean, I have a binder with 25 different documents in it (should be closer to 30 by the time I go out on leave), which are all -- seriously, WHAT IS MY JOB, CAN IT BE THIS PLZ? Assessments, and tools, and directives, oh my!
So that's driving me basically crazy, because my default job duty, in the absence of any other assignments, is "industry research," which is fine in short bursts, but gets really tiresome when it's the only thing you're doing for months at a time.
Home Stuff
I don't know what to do about the house, it's a disaster. It helps, now that we have someone coming in to help us get it back under control once a month. But I'd like to have it under better control before we have to deal with the baby AND the clutter, and right now that means Fabulous Husband is doing most of the work, which isn't fair to him and makes me feel really guilty besides. It's fine and cute and all to say I'm busy being pregnant, but that feels like a colossal cop-out.
In the meantime, mom is talking about wanting to get rid of the house in the next year or so. And I'm like... FUCK. Not while I'm pregnant, please. Won't hurt my credit rating, because I'm not anywhere on the paperwork, but she's taking her financial advice from Suze Orman, for whom I personally have little or no respect, and I'd like to see her talk to somebody credible.
School Stuff
So Fabulous Husband is accepted to Sac State for Spring term, for his masters in computer science, after Much Administrative Drama (ironically related to computer system screwups). So that's a good thing, as is it a good thing that he won't be a-studenting until after the baby arrives. At which point he'll probably dial back the home business dramatically to pick up a corporate internship. This means that if we do sell the house, we'll probably just rent in the area until we're ready to move, because I get to go back to school next, and most of the schools I'm interested in are in or near the bay area, as are many of the jobs for which Fabulous Husband is likely to want to apply.
Baby Stuff
Baby shower last weekend. Lovely, though I'm a bit dismayed that the only real photos of me are about gifts, which is kind of really completely not the point. My photo karma sucks.
So far behind where I want to be, which is ridiculous, because I feel like I don't even know what needs to be done, Except It Is a Lot. And despite having calendared everything in triplicate, I keep feeling like I'm losing track of all the appointments and classes... It's one of those things which would be solvable if I made up a list, but any list I make up is only going to have the things I can think of on it, and I'm Absolutely Sure I'm overlooking things, and in the meantime I don't think I'm even going to get everything done that I've already got planned (it doesn't help that half the time, the baby will only give me ten to fifteen minutes of activity before getting opinionated), and so what am I even thinking about trying to add more things? Except for that Absolute Certainty that one of the things I'm overlooking is going to be critical and stupid. And every time I sit down to try to start a list, I get completely overwhelmed by the task and my brain fries. Argh.
Mrghk. I suppose that is reason to have my brain be overfull. Plus a couple sekrit projects that're on hold until I can get things a little less randomized. Now to figure out what can be done about it...
Apparently, fortunately, NOT.
(I've been coming home and watching TV and not having Any Energy At All, which has been really really frustrating, because NONE OF THE THINGS I WANT TO DO GET DONE.)
That said, with what is my head full?
Suddenly I'm not quite sure...
No, no. It's stuff like...
Work Stuff
Work is going well but still boring because my manager hasn't had time to review anything I've given her in the last month. I'm reluctant to do more work that's only going to sit on her desk and feel even more overwhelming to her and is mostly make-work anyway because we're still sort of feeling our way around what my job is, now that I'm actually allowed to do it. So that's a little frustrating, because I like being busy and productive.
Also, all of my other managers eventually got to the point where they would at least throw me their own work for first cuts, so they'd have more time to review the copious amounts of work I was producing, but this one won't delegate anything, so she's got even less time than usual, not to mention that we're three managers down for the foreseeable future, and Just Argh.
In addition to which, stuff is more than usually on hold because we're waiting so we can incorporate audit and division reorg results, and I'd be FINE with that, but I've I've only got six weeks or so until I go on maternity leave, and I would LIKE to have things set up so I can hit the ground running when I get back in mid-January, which I can't do right now, because nobody will give me any feedback. I should have a new super-boss by then, which is great -- but let's have things prepped so we can present a coherent vision which they can yay or nay or modify. I mean, I have a binder with 25 different documents in it (should be closer to 30 by the time I go out on leave), which are all -- seriously, WHAT IS MY JOB, CAN IT BE THIS PLZ? Assessments, and tools, and directives, oh my!
So that's driving me basically crazy, because my default job duty, in the absence of any other assignments, is "industry research," which is fine in short bursts, but gets really tiresome when it's the only thing you're doing for months at a time.
Home Stuff
I don't know what to do about the house, it's a disaster. It helps, now that we have someone coming in to help us get it back under control once a month. But I'd like to have it under better control before we have to deal with the baby AND the clutter, and right now that means Fabulous Husband is doing most of the work, which isn't fair to him and makes me feel really guilty besides. It's fine and cute and all to say I'm busy being pregnant, but that feels like a colossal cop-out.
In the meantime, mom is talking about wanting to get rid of the house in the next year or so. And I'm like... FUCK. Not while I'm pregnant, please. Won't hurt my credit rating, because I'm not anywhere on the paperwork, but she's taking her financial advice from Suze Orman, for whom I personally have little or no respect, and I'd like to see her talk to somebody credible.
School Stuff
So Fabulous Husband is accepted to Sac State for Spring term, for his masters in computer science, after Much Administrative Drama (ironically related to computer system screwups). So that's a good thing, as is it a good thing that he won't be a-studenting until after the baby arrives. At which point he'll probably dial back the home business dramatically to pick up a corporate internship. This means that if we do sell the house, we'll probably just rent in the area until we're ready to move, because I get to go back to school next, and most of the schools I'm interested in are in or near the bay area, as are many of the jobs for which Fabulous Husband is likely to want to apply.
Baby Stuff
Baby shower last weekend. Lovely, though I'm a bit dismayed that the only real photos of me are about gifts, which is kind of really completely not the point. My photo karma sucks.
So far behind where I want to be, which is ridiculous, because I feel like I don't even know what needs to be done, Except It Is a Lot. And despite having calendared everything in triplicate, I keep feeling like I'm losing track of all the appointments and classes... It's one of those things which would be solvable if I made up a list, but any list I make up is only going to have the things I can think of on it, and I'm Absolutely Sure I'm overlooking things, and in the meantime I don't think I'm even going to get everything done that I've already got planned (it doesn't help that half the time, the baby will only give me ten to fifteen minutes of activity before getting opinionated), and so what am I even thinking about trying to add more things? Except for that Absolute Certainty that one of the things I'm overlooking is going to be critical and stupid. And every time I sit down to try to start a list, I get completely overwhelmed by the task and my brain fries. Argh.
Mrghk. I suppose that is reason to have my brain be overfull. Plus a couple sekrit projects that're on hold until I can get things a little less randomized. Now to figure out what can be done about it...