The Bates Family Legacy [5.3]
Well, hellooooooo there, all! How have you been? You're looking lovely today! I like those shoes!
Let's recap, shall we? Last time, Rhys had the Kanye West of bachelor parties. (And by that I don't mean dope-as-shit, I mean "the worst bachelor party of all time. OF ALL TIME.") Hadley started dating a guy named Wayne Bumble. Rhys found a laundry gnome! Peyton was overenthusiastic about laundry, weddings, and just about everything else. Rhys & Peyton got married, and moved out shortly afterwards. Wayne Bumble knocked Hadley up, and they had a shotgun wedding and then moved in together. Charlotte found out she was pregnant, after excessive trying, via the proof in the puke. Thank you Jesus, as my mother would say!
Let's head under the cut for some more fun, Bates style. And, contrary to this title picture, it's all mostly safe for work.
HANK!
I always love seeing the ghosts come out, but this night was particularly special since it was Hank's first haunting.
Dee was also there.
ARIEL: "Dee, be a good girl and stop cock-blocking Mommy."
Okay, now, I don't mean to be cruel or anything, but I've seen Belisama Hemlock. She is way too pretty to even come within ten feet of Matt, let alone date him!
Meanwhile, Ariel decided to cuckold her boyfriend and have a romantic reunion with her husband.
Fun fact: Hank's partner is listed as Ariel (the game has her as his fiancee), but Ariel's partner is listed as Matthew Hamming (her boyfriend).
Is this confusing for anyone yet?
Charlotte's got the non-baby bump, whee!
And some really bitchin' maternity wear. I think they went with the maxi-dress to match her super-cool sandals.
Oh, balls.
In other news, Bridgeport is home to GIANT MUTANT BUGS!
ARIEL: "Stupid fucking reputations, now Matthew won't call me back. And who's he to judge? He's got commitment issues!"
CHARLOTTE: "I'm just happy to be here. :D"
Charlotte is probably the most chill Bates family member. And the happiest.
In other news, Nora went to a party that was hosted by Renee Littler.
There we found this creepy specimen.
Nothing else happened of note; Nora spent the entire party talking to Rhys, who was also invited.
Get ready to see me use this gif again and again in my updates.
Charlotte just rides around town, fully pregnant, in her little scooter. She's obviously much more BAMF than you.
(The whole ride, though, I was laughing my ass off. How didn't she FALL OVER?)
FAMILY TREE UPDATE:
Hadley and Wayne Bumble-Bates had their baby, a little boy that they named Leonardo. I'm impressed. He's obviously destined to be wonderful.
I really love gnomes and all that shit, but I'd love them a little more if they stopped showing up at random places in the house. Like on Charlotte's desk.
JOSH: "AAAAH GOD AHHH YOU'RE IN LABOUR WE GOTTA GET TO THE HOSPITAL ASAP BUT HOW DO I BREATHE I DON'T REMEMBER."
CHARLOTTE: "Dude. Chill. I got this."
CHARLOTTE: "That husband of mine is really harshing my mellow."
Charlotte the Great then proceeded to drive herself to the hospital. On a vespa. While in labour.
SHE IS THE GREATEST WOMAN ALIVE.
And we have a...boy!?
This weird boy trend is freaking me out. I was expecting a girl. Or multiple girls.
Aged him up right after getting home. I HATE BABIES, OKAY?
Anyway, Aidan Bates is officially THE CUTEST KID EVER OMG LOVE. (Actually, he's probably even with toddler!Josh for cuteness. But the blue eyes give him a bit of an edge.)
Also, I want him to be kind of wacky, so I gave him genius and eccentric as his traits. Plus I've never played an eccentric sim before so this would be a good time to start.
Cut scene to the MOST PAINFUL CLUSTERFUCK OF ALL TIME!
Josh showed up early for work and didn't actually get into the fucking building until 7:59. His shift ended at 8 p.m.
Nora at least got one hour of work under her belt, enough to get her a promotion, but I had steam coming out of my ears waiting for Josh to get inside.
EA, you really shit the bed with this one.
Aww, that's so nice; Matt found someone to love him despite his face for who he is.
You know how I thought Terry was the world's most devoted parent? Well, between Charlotte and Josh, the two of them have edged Terry out of that title. They're practically fighting to spend time with their son. And then Terry, of course, fights his way in there for a little quality time with Aidan as well.
Just thought this picture was relevant to everyone's interests: two of the best looking sims in one frame.
CHARLOTTE/AIDAN SPAM:
For someone who doesn't have family oriented as a trait, Charlotte is doing a pretty good job of convincing me she is. She spends almost all of her time with Aidan, and 3/4 of her wishes revolve around him.
Excellent.
Terry has a better relationship with his grandson than he does with both of his actual sons (although he and Josh are Good Friends). I'm impressed with how seriously he's taken his grandfatherly duties.
So I decided that Charlotte and Josh are going to have five kids. I know it's ambitious, but Terry & Nora both want five grandchildren and Rhys & Peyton, despite my prayers, don't seem to be shouldering any of the burden. Besides, Jolotte have excellent genetics between them, so I want them to have as many babies as possible.
TL;DR: Charlotte's pregnant. She will probably be pregnant for the rest of her adult life because Peyton won't step up to the plate and make Terry & Nora some grandbabies.
SPEAKING OF BABIES, HAVE SOME JOSH/AIDAN SPAM:
SO CUTE I CAN'T EVEN.
Meanwhile, hello non-baby bump!
Since Charlotte's gonna have five babies, I figured I'd try to speed along the process with fruits and the fertility treatment.
OMG WE KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!
(In other news: when this happened I almost cried. It's been a long battle.)
FAMILY TREE UPDATE:
Matt became a young adult, and Leonardo is now a toddler. From his little thumbnail picture he seems to hold potential and I'll keep my fingers crossed that he got more of Wayne's genetics than Hadley's.
Yeah, probably because their relationship just became illegal in most of the world.
The couple that paints together, stays together! :D
In other news, look at that cute little baby bump! <3
So I happened to be stalking Terry at the theatre when I realized that Matt Bates was standing in front of me. This is what he looks like.
And for all of my mockery, he's not totally horrible looking - which may be thanks to Andre. In fact, in a weird way, he's almost sort of cute.
Sort of.
Oh hey Peyton!
When are you gonna start popping out babies, huh?
Terry and Nora need more grandchildren, Peyton.
Get to work.
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
HUSBAND AND WIFE TEAM DONE IN ONE CHAPTER!
Random: Nora and Josh both left work to find this random woman dying.
Awful as it is, I laughed just a little bit.
CHARLOTTE: "You know, Nora, I would love to continue our discussion later but I'm having a contraction. Best get myself to the hospital."
Seriously. World's most chill pregnant lady ever. Charlotte never once doubled over in pain during either labour!
Anyway, here we have...another boy?!?!
What is with this legacy all of a sudden? Why are you giving me boys? I've had so many girls that I almost don't know what to do with boys anymore!
I think Gavin got Charlotte's nose. But I love that he got Nora's hair!
Anywho, I gave him the friendly and brave traits because I'm kind of hoping he'll be a firefighter or something like that. I just really like firefighters and I haven't had one in my game for a while.
I have nothing to say about this picture, really. Fan service?
Anyway, Josh had been wanting to go to Egypt for the longest time, and Terry had an opportunity there, so I sent my two favourite boys on a trip.
I'll preface this picspam by saying that basically nothing happened: all Terry had to do was play his guitar for tips, and Josh kind of ran around doing nothing at all really. So I just took a bunch of pretty pictures - the scenery in Al Simhara is much more beautiful than I remembered!
This was almost the title picture. And then I changed my mind.
Even when he's derpy, he's adorable. <3
This was hilarious; this girl made no pretence of trying to talk to Josh, she just stopped in front of him and snapped a photo with her phone.
In other news, how does a little Egyptian girl get a camera phone before me?
So Josh went skinny dipping in the fountain. He actually fell in, which was the funniest thing I've ever seen. (He's really just ridiculously clumsy. He was standing by himself in the middle of nowhere and fell over.)
Lalalalala fanservice lalalalala...
OMG THIS IS THE WORLD'S BEST INTERACTION EVER.
Except don't.
Really. Please don't.
Anyway, I guess this is where I'll leave you for now (with some fanservice, how appropriate). It's been fun, children!
- Kelsey