(no subject)

[kellydyer]

I look down the hall
to my door so far away
I want to run to it
But I know I will only get tired

I walk swiftly for what feels like eternity
Progressing just barely enough to reach the first door
I grab the indented frame for stability
I look at my destination, which seems further than before

I muster the courage to continue
If I could just make it I will be saved
The walls are my support
These bare cold stern white walls

I make it to the next door
clutching the few ounces of life that remain
These walls trap me, yet I need them
I cannot stand alone so I rely on the walls that mock me

One more door, and I have reached the half way
I glance back to survey my progress
the beginning just as far as my goal
The feeling overwhelms

Perhaps I have made a terrible mistake
Is there anything within that door to nourish my soul
I know that outside the front door it is cold
But at least I know the cold

Far, far beyond that cold there is a hint of freedom that once was
But even I doubt I could make it
I look at my door
I look at the outside

I do not have long
The choice will not be there forever
Soon the coarse weaving of the carpet will devour me
What's the better choice, I scream. But no one hears

Oh Lord, I call for your wisdom
Will I be safe beyond the door?
Will I die out in the cold alone?
Or will you save me and let me live in warmth with you

God smiles at me
He knows I know the answer
I cannot rely on His house for warmth
I must somehow make warmth myself

I pick myself up and walk
I carry my limbs as if they are separate entities
I open the door to a room devoid of recognition
For now I will sleep
and hope
to wake up tomorrow
with feelings
of complacency