thoughts a brewing...
sunday. about 2:13 pm. i've only been awake about 3 short hours. however that's 2 more than this same time yesterday.
some days it is alot to haul my body out of bed. wake up my mind. i need more stimulation, yet nothing i reach out for is inspiring me just yet.
i am ambitionless. tired and weary of things around me. wanting out more. work less. laugh more. cry less.
i am happy here. i like being on my own and working for a living. but i feel drained by it all. perhaps my expectations were too high. my mind needs refashioning in some form where things are acceptable. i want more time to myself, more time to imagine and explore and create.
23 more days of work. 33 more days til i return to canada for a brief flicker of time. 40 more days til i see the one person i so crave right now.
without a doubt, the change in weather is affecting my attitude. endless dreary and cold days. i've appreciated sunshine more in my life.
*******
+ i'm learning to drive again! hurrah. this time - on a different side of the road, and a standard vehicle. i'm getting much better. soon i'll be able to putter around on my own methinks.
+ paid for ticket to staff xmas party. we've been told its snazzy and there's dancing. *shrugs* why the hell not?
+ go sens. (just thought i would throw that in for you.)
+ i really love my new brown boots. oh doc marten, you make good boots. not just for punk rockin' either.
******
i miss alot of things. a few of note: peanut butter. rye. you. hockey. my puppy. my family (even though they are crazy alot of the time). canadian accents. snow. crisp winter air. coffee. my queen sized bed. cheap phone calls. candy.
*****
that is all for now.
i will update more i promise. well... i'll try.
some days it is alot to haul my body out of bed. wake up my mind. i need more stimulation, yet nothing i reach out for is inspiring me just yet.
i am ambitionless. tired and weary of things around me. wanting out more. work less. laugh more. cry less.
i am happy here. i like being on my own and working for a living. but i feel drained by it all. perhaps my expectations were too high. my mind needs refashioning in some form where things are acceptable. i want more time to myself, more time to imagine and explore and create.
23 more days of work. 33 more days til i return to canada for a brief flicker of time. 40 more days til i see the one person i so crave right now.
without a doubt, the change in weather is affecting my attitude. endless dreary and cold days. i've appreciated sunshine more in my life.
*******
+ i'm learning to drive again! hurrah. this time - on a different side of the road, and a standard vehicle. i'm getting much better. soon i'll be able to putter around on my own methinks.
+ paid for ticket to staff xmas party. we've been told its snazzy and there's dancing. *shrugs* why the hell not?
+ go sens. (just thought i would throw that in for you.)
+ i really love my new brown boots. oh doc marten, you make good boots. not just for punk rockin' either.
******
i miss alot of things. a few of note: peanut butter. rye. you. hockey. my puppy. my family (even though they are crazy alot of the time). canadian accents. snow. crisp winter air. coffee. my queen sized bed. cheap phone calls. candy.
*****
that is all for now.
i will update more i promise. well... i'll try.