Ebb and Flow
It's taken me nearly three years, but I can finally feel myself easing into the waxing and waning of phases in a young lad's life.
The most recent weeks here at the Benson house have been a new special version of incredibly annoying. Niko is exploring all sorts of ownership concepts. Which means that there have been LOTS of arguments because when ever I say one thing, he naturally wants the opposite. Sometimes I can be patient with all his dilly dallying (shoot, that's one reason I'm happy to be staying at home right now. I got no friends and no where to go, so whatever!), but other times we actually do have things to do. A house still needs to be run and all that. Food needs to happen. Naps need to happen. Hell, going to the park to run him down needs to happen, too. FUN needs to happen! So it's hard to always be patient when the dilly dallying is strictly because he is going through some crazy brain development that is making him a total jerk.
During this most recent pain in the neck phase, I finally managed to keep my temper in check (this is not easy for a kellianne). Every day that ended, I took special pride. Another day when I didn't submit to assholery and become an asshole myself! But it was exhausting, let me tell you, to negotiate my way through 1538584378 conflicts a day. I just kept telling myself IT'S A PHASE IT'S A PHASE IT'S A PHASE HE WILL BE SO MUCH SMARTER WHEN THE TRANSFORMATION IS FINISHED!!
AND FINALLY!! Yesterday he woke up literally dancing and demanding a party. So we danced and partied, all day, and it was awesome. Suddenly he is speaking more clearly and acting so much more polite and empathic. We had a sitter over last night (the same sitter that he HATED 3 weeks ago) and he was pleased to see her. When she asked if he needed a bath, I said, "Well Niko, you haven't had any accidents today and you have had a bath for the past several nights, so I guess you can skip it!" and dude responded, "OH! Thank you for saying that mama! Thank you for saying I don't need a bath tonight!" and kissed me! What? So polite and sweet.
And this morning? More of the same. A perfect 2 hours long play date with no sharing issues AFTER a 45 minute bike ride that included 2 errands while he sat, perfectly chill, in his chariot. The other mom and I sat at the park and talked like adults the whole time while our sons played perfectly. Bliss. If every day were like this I would have a whole pack of kids!
I just want to put thanks out to the universe that that last phase (whatever it was) is over. I also want to enjoy this moment, because the tide will change again one day and I will again have to rein in my temper and tell myself it's just temporary.
Phew. You guys! Parenting is a weird and hard test on everything good I ever thought of myself before having a baby. Patience! Temper! Who knew the practice could be so consuming?
The most recent weeks here at the Benson house have been a new special version of incredibly annoying. Niko is exploring all sorts of ownership concepts. Which means that there have been LOTS of arguments because when ever I say one thing, he naturally wants the opposite. Sometimes I can be patient with all his dilly dallying (shoot, that's one reason I'm happy to be staying at home right now. I got no friends and no where to go, so whatever!), but other times we actually do have things to do. A house still needs to be run and all that. Food needs to happen. Naps need to happen. Hell, going to the park to run him down needs to happen, too. FUN needs to happen! So it's hard to always be patient when the dilly dallying is strictly because he is going through some crazy brain development that is making him a total jerk.
During this most recent pain in the neck phase, I finally managed to keep my temper in check (this is not easy for a kellianne). Every day that ended, I took special pride. Another day when I didn't submit to assholery and become an asshole myself! But it was exhausting, let me tell you, to negotiate my way through 1538584378 conflicts a day. I just kept telling myself IT'S A PHASE IT'S A PHASE IT'S A PHASE HE WILL BE SO MUCH SMARTER WHEN THE TRANSFORMATION IS FINISHED!!
AND FINALLY!! Yesterday he woke up literally dancing and demanding a party. So we danced and partied, all day, and it was awesome. Suddenly he is speaking more clearly and acting so much more polite and empathic. We had a sitter over last night (the same sitter that he HATED 3 weeks ago) and he was pleased to see her. When she asked if he needed a bath, I said, "Well Niko, you haven't had any accidents today and you have had a bath for the past several nights, so I guess you can skip it!" and dude responded, "OH! Thank you for saying that mama! Thank you for saying I don't need a bath tonight!" and kissed me! What? So polite and sweet.
And this morning? More of the same. A perfect 2 hours long play date with no sharing issues AFTER a 45 minute bike ride that included 2 errands while he sat, perfectly chill, in his chariot. The other mom and I sat at the park and talked like adults the whole time while our sons played perfectly. Bliss. If every day were like this I would have a whole pack of kids!
I just want to put thanks out to the universe that that last phase (whatever it was) is over. I also want to enjoy this moment, because the tide will change again one day and I will again have to rein in my temper and tell myself it's just temporary.
Phew. You guys! Parenting is a weird and hard test on everything good I ever thought of myself before having a baby. Patience! Temper! Who knew the practice could be so consuming?