School...
Well tomorrow starts another year of High School for me. I'm not too excited about it actually. It seems like every year before this one I've gotten excited just about the time I went to buy school supplies.But this year everything is different,I've already bought my school supplies and gathered them in my new backpack,but it isn't the same...I'm just not excited for school to be starting. I know that every kid probably goes through this in their life numerous times,but this has actually been the first time I have felt like this. I still have a year of high School after this,but i think that will be my hardest year not only because it is my last but because the people that I hangout with the most and the person I love won't be there with me. I know that sounds a little selfish,but I'll be honest...I am a little selfish. I am more afraid than anything though. I go through everyday wondering if I'm pretty enough,skinny enough,smart enough.I think that over the summer I have gotten a little better with all of these things and I know that the best thing to do is be myself,but that isn't always easy when you have a bazillion other girls gossiping about you or other girls in front of you or in the bathroom at school or wherever they may be. I just want to be the one that he can look at and he can say that he is happy to be with me and happy to have me and no one else. I guess the real reason I am writing this is because I don't want to lose him! I know that sounds obsessive,and maybe i am to some extent,but I know one thing and that is that I love this guy like I have never loved anyone else. There is something special about him,from the first time I saw him I knew he was the one that I wanted. I'm just afraid that once we start roaming the halls of school again and getting back into the swing of things that maybe our relationship will lose it's swing of things. I just don't want that to happen. I know that I am blowing things way out of proportion,but I can't help thinking about all of the other girls there that are prettier than me or smarter than me. I'm just scared. I just figured that the best way to say this was on pixeled paper. I'll calm down and everything will be okay,just gotta get back into the swing of things. And to my boyfriend Alex, I trust that you will always be there for me and I love you for that. You make me incredibly happy,I couldn't have enjoyed my summer the way I did without you! You mean the world to me...I know you know that. Love you with all my heart Alex. Thanks for reading. Comments are great,but not anything I have to have.