(no subject)
OK..this isn't easy to say...umm..but umm..ok..here..straight out...I'm dropping out of high school and getting my GED. Umm..damn..this is gonna be hard to explain though writing. Lets see..first of all..I dun know why..but school...it makes me depressed..way too stressed out..and I can't take it...maybe its cause I'm trying to do to much at once...school, TKD, my mom wants me to get a job, and I do want to have some time for my friends..without them I would go crazy..sometimes I think they are the only thing keeping me alive sometimes..I can talk to them..and they acctually understand most of what I mean. It seems all my mom wants to do it cut me off from that part of my life..she doesn't understand that I need my friends. She wants me to do stuff with my other friends..the ones that live near me..but she doesn't understand..there isn't much you can do when you dun have a car or money..accept sit around and cause trouble, and to get the car and money I have to get a job..and if I get a job then I won't have time for my friends. Ok now..umm..anyways..the school aspect..heres kinda how I see it..as best as I can say it through writing. If I was to finish high school..wuts next? college. I can't take that much more school..and I dun have the money either..I dun know what college..and I dun know wut I wanna go to college for either..I though at once..that I wanted to study linguistics..but when you think about it..I'll only end up spending all that time and money to find that there aren't really all that many jobs I can get. I would probably end up working some dead end job anyways. And thats if I even make it though college. I mean..college is alot of pressure..and I dun do well with pressure and stress..=/ Then there is the other side..if I drop out now..I can get my GED and get a job..make some money..get a car..save up some money..then go to TSTC(Texas State Tech College) and learn to work with computers. I mean..thats how I see it..one thing though..I know if I tell my aunt or anyone besides my mom..they will just tell me I'm crazy and to stick it out..well you can't always just "stick it out." My mom knows this and she has promised not to talk to them. Well anyways...thats that..and I dun really have anything else to say about it..oh yeah..I'm getting my drivers license soon..we get the T.E.A form tomorrow so I can go get the liscense this week. I'm gonna ask my mom if a car can like..be my bday/chirstmas present from the whole family..cuz thats what I want..literally..thats the only major thing that I want right now..and that I need. I mean..sure..I'd like a laptop..but I have a comp..sure I'd like more cds..but I got mp3s...sure I'd like a new cd player..but I have a cd player..and those are all things I can get with my own money once I have my own car. SO anyways..thats what I'm gonna do..and I'm kinda excited bout the drivers licsence..even though I hate driving..I think its only cuz I don't want my mom in the car with me..she makes me nervous..shes always yelling and making me tense..and I live my life best when its calm. Anyways..I gonna go now..*waves*