Once again trying...
Two years, huh? It's a very long time, and short at the same time. Although I keep thinking the good times when I look back to my LJ days, I know it isn't true. At the very least, not entirely. There has to be a reason why I'm leaving at all, right? I sure never left FFnet for a long period of time.
Maybe I'm just really, a stalker. Always want to get something, but not giving anything - not even bits of myself, hence little to no journal I ever post. FF gives me the privilege of having my profile true to my anonymous intentions, a faceless person, one among million on the net. A journal, however, is something that pulls me into that faceless person, shaping a personality that is really myself, and I'm scared. And so I'm running away, just leaving comments here and there, and keep getting what I want without giving anything.
But... Written language, as opposed to spoken language, especially when not getting done in one's own mother language, is a dangerous thing. It is easily understood, yet more than not, misunderstood. Short snippets of words might backfire if someone doesn't know the true personality, true intentions, behind those words. I experienced that a lot. What else can I say but mere apologies? I never let myself known to other people, and as one can have their own style in praising or stating something, one's words tend to make people think that the intentions behind are bad.
...I don't know.
Among these two years, I think I've changed somehow. Maturing, I wish.
And now, I want to let people know bits and fragments of myself, so that I can stay true to myself. And in, I wish, not getting misunderstood. ^^ And of course, in making new friends, maybe reconnecting with old friends, and once again enjoying the glorious days of fandoms.
...the end.
Maybe I'm just really, a stalker. Always want to get something, but not giving anything - not even bits of myself, hence little to no journal I ever post. FF gives me the privilege of having my profile true to my anonymous intentions, a faceless person, one among million on the net. A journal, however, is something that pulls me into that faceless person, shaping a personality that is really myself, and I'm scared. And so I'm running away, just leaving comments here and there, and keep getting what I want without giving anything.
But... Written language, as opposed to spoken language, especially when not getting done in one's own mother language, is a dangerous thing. It is easily understood, yet more than not, misunderstood. Short snippets of words might backfire if someone doesn't know the true personality, true intentions, behind those words. I experienced that a lot. What else can I say but mere apologies? I never let myself known to other people, and as one can have their own style in praising or stating something, one's words tend to make people think that the intentions behind are bad.
...I don't know.
Among these two years, I think I've changed somehow. Maturing, I wish.
And now, I want to let people know bits and fragments of myself, so that I can stay true to myself. And in, I wish, not getting misunderstood. ^^ And of course, in making new friends, maybe reconnecting with old friends, and once again enjoying the glorious days of fandoms.
...the end.