(no subject)
Wow. What an intense past week this has been...uh...Josh did give me the needed push to talk with my family about the college matter and they wholly agree that it is best for me to move onto where I really should be. It was a smart thing of me to do, to hold all my dreaded depressed feelings in until I got better on my own before confessing to them all the plans I have of shifting my life around and such.
I belong in an art proffession. I mean people who know me and know of my art talent over the past year, all relatives, friends of mine, everyone one of them *believes* in my talent. This has led me believe in my talent as well and oh gosh with out their believing in my talents I don't think that I could ever allow myself to drop out of meteorology. I would still be at loss as to who I am and what potentials are within. Oh gosh. So, I really don't know what to say bout the rest of the semester. I can't start up the Art classes up until fall of this year b/c they dont offer the same ones in spring semester. I think I should stay home all the way through the next 7 months, get myself a job at Border's maybe...hrm...I honestly don't know if my parents want me doing that...will it be an issue to just take a semester off like that? What is needed to do about it now? I wonder...I'll find out...
Okay :D Unfortunately I couldn't see Alex before he left Friday night. He told me on Wednesday that he couldn't make it down b/c of predicted snow, which came, and b/c there was a film majors meeting on sunday and class starts tuesday so he told me he had no way of getting down to Norwalk. Its no big deal though. I'll see him over spring break in march perhaps...It was a slight disapointment but I suppose its all good now.
Last night I went into NYC...tore through the money earned makin' cookies and money given as x-mas presents...I spend a heck of alot. $18 for train ticket $4 for subway ticket $30 for the show Mission of Burma $8 for a CD $3.50 for dinner and $15 for a shirt that I lost five min after I sat down with :( That was a real shame :( But the rest of the money was well spent. I enjoyed the show, we were close to the stage...in spitting range of the the guitar player Roger Miller lol...it was pretty loud and most of their sounds to me just sounded like jumbled tangled knots of noises with an okay drum beat behind it. I highly enjoyed the four songs that were familiar to me, although those too sounded too much of the same, sorry to say. I wish we were more in the center like Brendan and Soto were wanting to do b/c I know if we were we could all immerse ourselves a bit more and be less dull b/c isn't that the point of having music and going to see concerts? Music is supposed to engage you, get people together...it was sorta boring at times because I'd look around and people were just staring blank faced and dull either that or just onlooking like I was and nodding their heads...the band plays for everyone's enjoyment not just for their own. Bluh why do I ramble on like this blah lol
I was hungry before the show, bought that pizza that tasted like Sbarrrow but I just couldn't consume...something made me lose all apitite, I guess it was anxious excitement to get to show...and the fact that we were in NYC and how I was outdoors for once :) At times I felt annoyed around the group b/c I didnt exactly feel noticed or included most of the time. Soto was wary many times of where I was and the mood I was in and I can give credit to him but Brendan and Ben were just kinda interupting eachother, talking over eachother and fighting to get sentenses in, not really interested in including everyone and making everyone feel as part of the group. I hate it when conversation is competitive like that, more talking and less listening and understanding. I guess its also b/c I'm not quite as good of a friend to brendan and soto either b/c I've only hung around brendan like three times...and Soto twice. Well blah what does it matter anywho. Bah why am I so affected by it anywho. I know why but I don't wish to ramble on and on again.
Yeah, so overall it was awesome. I enjoyed the night...there was a dilema on the way home though with the subway passes...the stupid swiper machines were having issues with our cards it was complete nonsense. Soto got through but only him so the three of us were forced to find another subway entry...when we did my card worked but Brendan's was still messed up...we were feeling a bit rushed and afraid to miss the train so you can imagine how nerve wracking this was for all of us...and the fact that soto was stranded one the other side of that other entrance that we couldn't pass through...so Brendan and Ben went in with one card and it so happens there was an officer on the lookout. Saw the two pull that move and came right for us. They were pulled out to the police booth for some time while me and Dan were stuck in the stinky moulding smelling hallway with the geiser music...after some twenty min they came back out...each with a ridiculous $60 fine for pulling a move like that. The good thing is that we didn't miss the train. It was actually 25 min later than we'd anticipated so we had time to squat down and take a little rest. The ride home we were both high on tiredness or something...lol...Me and Ben got off in Rowayton and Ben came over to spend the night...or what little there was of it remaining. It was sometime around 3:20 when we'd finally arrived at home...there was a nice sheet of snow on the roads and everywhere we walked and as we did the snow was still coming down...very very pretty sight...but much too late to enjoy it...we got a nice peaceful sleep in...he only had three hours tho b/c he had to race back to the train at 7:30. I didn't want him to leave but sometimes ya just gotta do what ya gotta do to get by. I know I'd prolly get a chance to see him tomorrow anyhow since its a day off for those high school guys heh...so after he'd gone off I drifted right back into sleep...slept til 11:30, lay in bed for an hour w/ thoughts feeling so blah and upset w/ myself for sleeping so late...I listened and waited for my dad to go and then finally wandered downstairs...ate b/c I was starving since five or six the night before and then wandered back into bed somehow...slept another three hours...man I just want to do something productive right now. Like bike riding perhaps...but yeah it just snowed another five/six inches. eh i'll switch on the ole tele again. I'd rather not go on AIM for a while...I'd just rather not lol....okies...bubye
I belong in an art proffession. I mean people who know me and know of my art talent over the past year, all relatives, friends of mine, everyone one of them *believes* in my talent. This has led me believe in my talent as well and oh gosh with out their believing in my talents I don't think that I could ever allow myself to drop out of meteorology. I would still be at loss as to who I am and what potentials are within. Oh gosh. So, I really don't know what to say bout the rest of the semester. I can't start up the Art classes up until fall of this year b/c they dont offer the same ones in spring semester. I think I should stay home all the way through the next 7 months, get myself a job at Border's maybe...hrm...I honestly don't know if my parents want me doing that...will it be an issue to just take a semester off like that? What is needed to do about it now? I wonder...I'll find out...
Okay :D Unfortunately I couldn't see Alex before he left Friday night. He told me on Wednesday that he couldn't make it down b/c of predicted snow, which came, and b/c there was a film majors meeting on sunday and class starts tuesday so he told me he had no way of getting down to Norwalk. Its no big deal though. I'll see him over spring break in march perhaps...It was a slight disapointment but I suppose its all good now.
Last night I went into NYC...tore through the money earned makin' cookies and money given as x-mas presents...I spend a heck of alot. $18 for train ticket $4 for subway ticket $30 for the show Mission of Burma $8 for a CD $3.50 for dinner and $15 for a shirt that I lost five min after I sat down with :( That was a real shame :( But the rest of the money was well spent. I enjoyed the show, we were close to the stage...in spitting range of the the guitar player Roger Miller lol...it was pretty loud and most of their sounds to me just sounded like jumbled tangled knots of noises with an okay drum beat behind it. I highly enjoyed the four songs that were familiar to me, although those too sounded too much of the same, sorry to say. I wish we were more in the center like Brendan and Soto were wanting to do b/c I know if we were we could all immerse ourselves a bit more and be less dull b/c isn't that the point of having music and going to see concerts? Music is supposed to engage you, get people together...it was sorta boring at times because I'd look around and people were just staring blank faced and dull either that or just onlooking like I was and nodding their heads...the band plays for everyone's enjoyment not just for their own. Bluh why do I ramble on like this blah lol
I was hungry before the show, bought that pizza that tasted like Sbarrrow but I just couldn't consume...something made me lose all apitite, I guess it was anxious excitement to get to show...and the fact that we were in NYC and how I was outdoors for once :) At times I felt annoyed around the group b/c I didnt exactly feel noticed or included most of the time. Soto was wary many times of where I was and the mood I was in and I can give credit to him but Brendan and Ben were just kinda interupting eachother, talking over eachother and fighting to get sentenses in, not really interested in including everyone and making everyone feel as part of the group. I hate it when conversation is competitive like that, more talking and less listening and understanding. I guess its also b/c I'm not quite as good of a friend to brendan and soto either b/c I've only hung around brendan like three times...and Soto twice. Well blah what does it matter anywho. Bah why am I so affected by it anywho. I know why but I don't wish to ramble on and on again.
Yeah, so overall it was awesome. I enjoyed the night...there was a dilema on the way home though with the subway passes...the stupid swiper machines were having issues with our cards it was complete nonsense. Soto got through but only him so the three of us were forced to find another subway entry...when we did my card worked but Brendan's was still messed up...we were feeling a bit rushed and afraid to miss the train so you can imagine how nerve wracking this was for all of us...and the fact that soto was stranded one the other side of that other entrance that we couldn't pass through...so Brendan and Ben went in with one card and it so happens there was an officer on the lookout. Saw the two pull that move and came right for us. They were pulled out to the police booth for some time while me and Dan were stuck in the stinky moulding smelling hallway with the geiser music...after some twenty min they came back out...each with a ridiculous $60 fine for pulling a move like that. The good thing is that we didn't miss the train. It was actually 25 min later than we'd anticipated so we had time to squat down and take a little rest. The ride home we were both high on tiredness or something...lol...Me and Ben got off in Rowayton and Ben came over to spend the night...or what little there was of it remaining. It was sometime around 3:20 when we'd finally arrived at home...there was a nice sheet of snow on the roads and everywhere we walked and as we did the snow was still coming down...very very pretty sight...but much too late to enjoy it...we got a nice peaceful sleep in...he only had three hours tho b/c he had to race back to the train at 7:30. I didn't want him to leave but sometimes ya just gotta do what ya gotta do to get by. I know I'd prolly get a chance to see him tomorrow anyhow since its a day off for those high school guys heh...so after he'd gone off I drifted right back into sleep...slept til 11:30, lay in bed for an hour w/ thoughts feeling so blah and upset w/ myself for sleeping so late...I listened and waited for my dad to go and then finally wandered downstairs...ate b/c I was starving since five or six the night before and then wandered back into bed somehow...slept another three hours...man I just want to do something productive right now. Like bike riding perhaps...but yeah it just snowed another five/six inches. eh i'll switch on the ole tele again. I'd rather not go on AIM for a while...I'd just rather not lol....okies...bubye