House Stuff
so - I spent today realizing that my job probably (most likely) will not keep me on in a National Sales Position. I was actually hoping for that and so liked the idea that they are stressing over my leaving, but what I told my boss was - in an open honest e-mail is.... I can't afford to live here. It doesn't matter what kind of money I make or where my "career" is going - the cost of living is to the point that I will forever remain poor. We are stuck in a never ending revolving door of debt - and we don't have any debt. Does that make sense? We have no credit cards, no mortgage payments, nothing and we can't live.... that's not right. People need to enjoy - I am so very excited about this move and at times wish the excitement I feel could be relayed to the people I love. That there comes a time when you stop, look around and realize that no matter how hard you try you can't change the growth around you - and maybe we are running, maybe we aren't. Maybe there is a reason so deep to move that we can't explain why. That our answer isn't there yet, that our reasons can't be explained in a normal way.... blah blah - I'm very sad for leaving - but I am very happy for leaving. I want to be back in control - I want to have dinner with my husband, I want to garden, I want to enjoy the beauty that life has to offer. If I have to give up one thing to achieve another - then I have to weigh which is most important - my life, my family, my friends, my total existance lies within those three things - life family friends - there are times, when one or two of those things goes first and then there are times when one or two of those things goes last - but in the past few years, peace has been first. Our peace. Tonight during casual convo, VP and I realized we can't make it here - well actually we realized that a long time ago - we miss out on really important business things, but we also miss out on each other. I'm not willing to miss out on that anymore - I need to slow my life down, a "stop and smell the roses" if you wish - why Kentucky - why not? I have always been in love with history, the past, the simpler things in life - the South. So has VP, so we move, so we have to plan events, so we have to see our loved ones less - I have the best friends and family ever - but there comes a time when I have to look at the person next to me - first. I hope everyone understands, I feel as if they don't - our door is open, its just a bit further down the road - but its open.