(no subject)
3 nights alone now. He's left me alone in my darkest time for 3 nights. Whether he could help it or not doesn't even seem to matter. All that matters is how dark it is. How lonely it is. How fragile I am. How that horrible dream of me being so cut up he couldn't touch me is slowly coming true, one patch at a time, day by day. And I don't know what to do. I want to pull away. I want forget it. I want to give up. I want to push him away. But I can't. Part of me can't. The part of me that...cares for him... won't let me. No. Every time I try, I feel worse after. I feel more broken each time I try to tell him goodbye. I don't know what to do. But I'm tired of breaking. And I'm tired of being alone.