More Marksy ficlets
These are the most helpful things of life. There is one part with Mark that gave me an epiphany. Anyway, I know people like Mark and Sydney... although I don't know why... anyway, I tried something different with the narration, we'll see how that works.
I might have to give these things a name.
It takes place like.... 5 months after the last one, and like a couple days or a week or 2 before the next chapter of BBYL which I'll post soon.
XXXXXXXXXX
“It’s another girl right?”
Addison looks like she might give me the whole ‘you said you didn’t want to know’ bullshit again, but she is clearly not in the mood because she just nods.
“Can’t you do anything about that? Mark is going to keep impregnating me until I produce a male heir. Do you know what childbirth does to Ladytown?”
“Ladytown. Is that close to Vancouver?”
“Kegel’s only do so much so fast, Addison.” She’s dry and pissy today.
“You aren’t suppose to be visiting Ladytown for at least 6 weeks anyway. That’s a lot of Kegel’s. Are you telling me you take unauthorized trips to Ladytown?”
“No… not trips per say. The occasional detour, a little sightseeing. Not a full on vacation.”
“Well, don’t this time. Please. Wait until I give you the okay then you can move to Ladytown for all I care. But, until then consider it hit by a natural disaster and still being rebuilt.”
“You’re grumpy.” I’m stating the obvious here.
“I know. When I sat down I saw Derek come in then leave again when he saw me.”
She's McPouty now, “Isn’t that wait you told him to do?”
“Yeah, but I wish he wouldn’t listen.”
She looks so wistful it’s kinda sad. “Hey, we haven’t put our loft on the market yet, it’s great for one person. Or a couple. If you’re interested--”
“No,” she shakes her head adamantly and is totally avoiding eye contact, “I’m fine where I am.”
“Ya, but you can’t stay there forever.”
She’s kinda smiling now, it’s kind of a creepy smile, “Why not? Trust me, I’m liking where I am.”
“You use the word ‘like’ loosely don’t you.”
“Sometimes, yeah.”
“By the way, I want to do an all natural home-birth. You in?”
XXXX
“What about that one?”
“Which one?”
“The blonde.”
“I don’t do blondes.”
“Since when?” I distinctly remember there being blondes. Jackie was a blonde wasn’t she? He dated her in high school. I think. Or that was me… I definitely dated her in high school, but I think he did too. There have been blondes. “There have been blondes, Derek.”
“I’m not picking up a blonde in a bar.”
This was easier when I was single, “I’m going to go talk to them, she has a cute friend,” If he doesn’t follow me so help me god… “Hi. I’m Mark,” insert charming manwhore smile.
“Rebecca.”
“Natalie.”
“This is my friend Derek,” Good, he’s standing behind me, “We were just saying that you ladies must be the 4th and 5th prettiest girls in Seattle.”
“4th and 5th?”
Another charming smile, and luckily I have almost an entire baby album in my wallet. Women melt over babies, “This is my wife, Sydney, and these are our girls, Bea and Roxie. They get the top 3 spots,” wink as they gush “But you ladies are a close 4th and 5th.”
“So you’re married?”
“I am,” Derek needs to say something, soon, “But my friend Derek here isn’t. He’s had a couple of bad break ups.”
“A couple?”
Uh Oh. They seem skeptical and suspicious. They are eyeing Derek like he’s an axe murderer. “Yeah. His wife, well, she slept with his best friend. He was heartbroken. Then his next girlfriend, she dumped him on his birthday.” Haha. Derek looks appropriately pitiful. And the blushing works for him. They are eating it up. He’s got it from here.
XXXX
“Quick question.”
“Okay,” And by okay I mean I am completely confused because Meredith Grey is talking to me. I was under the impression that she hated me by association.
“It’s half personal, is that alright?”
Now I’m really scared… “Yeah, that’s fine.”
“It’s actually about Sydney.”
“Okay,” I’m back to being confused.
“What does she like about general surgery?”
What? “Ummm… she likes it? I don’t know what you’re… she likes it. There’s a lot of stuff you know. She likes stuff. Different stuff, so general is good. She likes that there is so much to it. In the morning she might be removing a tumor from someone esophagus and by the end of her shift she’s repairing a ruptured bile duct. She likes that. Why?”
“I think… I used to like that me and Derek had the same specialty, it was kind of a bond, but lately it’s been kinda lackluster, I think I might need a change.”
“That will set you back a few years.”
“I think I’m okay with that. She likes the variety?”
“Ya. And it’s nice that we aren’t on the same service, we don’t usually take work home with us. Actually we never talk about work at home. We don’t even like each others jobs.” I’m trying to be supportive and reassuring, is it working? “You should ask Bailey.”
Her face lights up a bit, and it’s impossible not to smile back, when the woman smiles it’s the real thing, “Thanks Mark.”
I really miss having Meredith as my friend. We have a bond. We are the dirty mistresses. Did anyone consider my feelings when they decided to screw over my partner in crime.
I miss Meredith.
XXXX
“But I’m hungryyy,” I realize that I’m whining, but it’s been at least an hour since I was last fed. Being like 5 years pregnant makes me want everything thats food all the time -- which led to an interesting 2nd trimester when I wanted everything food and everything sex all the time. They combine well. You can do a lot with crackers and Cheez-Whiz.
“I just fed you.” Mark shifts Bea to his other arm and hands her a sippy cup of fruit juice, “We could get some picnic stuff and eat at one of those tables over there. Roxie must be starving by now. It’s been almost 15 minutes since you gave her that cookie.”
I really want that corn on the cob. Maybe I’ll get that for dinner. With steak. And potato salad. And brownies. With ice cream. And lemonade. “How hard do you think it will be for them to eat corn on the cob?”
Mark watches Bea drink her juice as she watches him with round eyes, “Hard. But cute.”
“I’ll bring the camera to the table then,” Where is the camera? The bathroom maybe? I was taking pictures of last nights bath… no, it’s in the hall closet. I was going to bring it today because these dresses are adorable. Thank you Baby Gap for having a bohemian baby line. Speaking of babies… I’m pretty sure that we brought two of them to the market this morning. “Mark? Where’s Roxie?”
“Derek has her.”
“Oh,” Oh! There he is! He’s talking to a woman! He’s talking to a woman! “Mark. He’s--”
“I know.”
“He’s talking to a woman.” He’s talking to a woman. He’s talking to a wooooooomaaaaaaaaan! “He’s flirting. He could date her. He could take her to restaurants and movies and he could stop hanging around us. Mark, he’s talking to a woman!” I’m way to excited about this. But Derek is talking to a woman!
“Come on Syd. He’s lonely. You’re the one that invited him over to dinner.”
“5 months ago. I thought he and Addison would have decided on a definite plan of attack by now.” I’m sick of Derek. He is mopey and morose. And he misses Addison and Addison is like… finding herself. And Meredith is like… insane. I don’t know how else to describe that whole… thing. I liked it better when she was stomping around and yelling, this is eerie and weird. No weirder then Addison -- but that I understand, and encourage. Derek is just… maybe he’s talking to women to make the other two jealous… “Mark? Do you think--”
“He’s not smooth enough to make Addison or Meredith jealous of anyone that isn’t Addison or Meredith. He knows it.”
Ya, that’s true. He needs to get laid. Stat.
“He misses her.”
“I know,”Ya. He certainly does. “But can’t he miss her some where that isn’t our house?”
“Derek can’t do anything by himself. And he’s going to help us move. He comes in handy. Hey, bunnies.”
Mark tugs the sippy cup from Bea’s hand and carries her over to a small enclosure that holds baby rabbits. He sets her on her feet and holds a bunny so she can pet and hug it. She goes from terrified to enamored in less then a minute, and if I don’t go over there she’s going to be the proud owner of a baby bunny because Mark has that look in his eye that says he’s completely in love and will do anything to keep that look on her face.
“Syd…”
It’s that voice, the soft dad voice that he started using when he’d read motorcycle maintenance articles to the twins well before their fetus selves developed ears or any sensory capabilities.
“No.” Where is… “Derek!” Roxanna should not be missing this, “Bring me back my child!” He’s very reluctant to walk away from this woman. She looks like a soccer mom. She’s wearing one of those matching track suits. At least it’s a cute one. “You should invite her to the Forth of July party,” I suggest as I point Roxie in the direction of her father and sister who have moved on to kittens. Mark wraps an arm around Roxie as she runs unsteadily into his arms and he plants a big kiss on her cheek. Who would have thought that he would be such a natural father.
“The party?”
He’s staring at her. He’s interested but I think it might be one of those passing things, like you’re interested when you are standing right in front of them but 20 minutes later you are distracted by something shiny or a sign for 2 for one cheeseburgers. “Invite her to the party Derek. Like a date.”
“Is...I mean,” he’s considering it, “Who else is going?”
Smooth. “Addison and all her minions are coming. I think Alex is coming with her too.”
“Okay…”
“Go ask her. Now. Go. GO!”
He listens, jogging across the market to her calling ‘Emily’. He’ll probably cancel on her by the Forth of July but it’s a start. Lonely Derek irks me. I mean I kinda understand the whole New York dynamic of Derek and Addison’s marriage now, they would have had Mark hanging off of them all the time. It’s hard to be a couple when there is a third person there. I mean, I’m kinda starting to think I’m married to both of them, like if they’re up watching a game and I want to go to bed I feel I should be kissing them both good night. That’s not normal. Although I don’t think I’ll ever be tempted to sleep with Derek -- the thing about adultery is that, in theory, you should trade up, which Addison did. I don’t think that cheating on Mark with Derek would be very logical. I also don’t know who a step up from Mark is. I think I’m on the top rung here. Unless Brad Pitt comes to town… it could happen.
“Syd? Can we get a puppy?”
Awwww. Every member of my family is holding a squirming ball of curly fur. People are looking at them and smiling, jealous, cause I serious have the most beautiful husband and children. I am the odd one out, they are picture perfect. A god-like man, adorable identical twins in matching dresses, abet in opposite colours, and me… 32 weeks pregnant with the worlds largest baby, swollen, sweating and starving. He carries over a puppy and puts it in my arms and dammit it’s adorable. “Mark, we can’t,” See I’m saying this but I’m not sure why we can’t. They are so cuuuute, “We are having a baby in 6 weeks… we… I… “ I really want the puppy.
“Oh, I know. God, we can’t get a puppy now Sydney. I was thinking when the girls are older, like 5. That’s a good age to get a puppy right? Junior will be 4, the girls will be starting school. We should get a puppy so we have something to play with.”
“Okay,” Yeah! We’re getting a puppy! And Derek talked to a woman! And we are getting a puppy!
XXXX
I might have to give these things a name.
It takes place like.... 5 months after the last one, and like a couple days or a week or 2 before the next chapter of BBYL which I'll post soon.
XXXXXXXXXX
“It’s another girl right?”
Addison looks like she might give me the whole ‘you said you didn’t want to know’ bullshit again, but she is clearly not in the mood because she just nods.
“Can’t you do anything about that? Mark is going to keep impregnating me until I produce a male heir. Do you know what childbirth does to Ladytown?”
“Ladytown. Is that close to Vancouver?”
“Kegel’s only do so much so fast, Addison.” She’s dry and pissy today.
“You aren’t suppose to be visiting Ladytown for at least 6 weeks anyway. That’s a lot of Kegel’s. Are you telling me you take unauthorized trips to Ladytown?”
“No… not trips per say. The occasional detour, a little sightseeing. Not a full on vacation.”
“Well, don’t this time. Please. Wait until I give you the okay then you can move to Ladytown for all I care. But, until then consider it hit by a natural disaster and still being rebuilt.”
“You’re grumpy.” I’m stating the obvious here.
“I know. When I sat down I saw Derek come in then leave again when he saw me.”
She's McPouty now, “Isn’t that wait you told him to do?”
“Yeah, but I wish he wouldn’t listen.”
She looks so wistful it’s kinda sad. “Hey, we haven’t put our loft on the market yet, it’s great for one person. Or a couple. If you’re interested--”
“No,” she shakes her head adamantly and is totally avoiding eye contact, “I’m fine where I am.”
“Ya, but you can’t stay there forever.”
She’s kinda smiling now, it’s kind of a creepy smile, “Why not? Trust me, I’m liking where I am.”
“You use the word ‘like’ loosely don’t you.”
“Sometimes, yeah.”
“By the way, I want to do an all natural home-birth. You in?”
XXXX
“What about that one?”
“Which one?”
“The blonde.”
“I don’t do blondes.”
“Since when?” I distinctly remember there being blondes. Jackie was a blonde wasn’t she? He dated her in high school. I think. Or that was me… I definitely dated her in high school, but I think he did too. There have been blondes. “There have been blondes, Derek.”
“I’m not picking up a blonde in a bar.”
This was easier when I was single, “I’m going to go talk to them, she has a cute friend,” If he doesn’t follow me so help me god… “Hi. I’m Mark,” insert charming manwhore smile.
“Rebecca.”
“Natalie.”
“This is my friend Derek,” Good, he’s standing behind me, “We were just saying that you ladies must be the 4th and 5th prettiest girls in Seattle.”
“4th and 5th?”
Another charming smile, and luckily I have almost an entire baby album in my wallet. Women melt over babies, “This is my wife, Sydney, and these are our girls, Bea and Roxie. They get the top 3 spots,” wink as they gush “But you ladies are a close 4th and 5th.”
“So you’re married?”
“I am,” Derek needs to say something, soon, “But my friend Derek here isn’t. He’s had a couple of bad break ups.”
“A couple?”
Uh Oh. They seem skeptical and suspicious. They are eyeing Derek like he’s an axe murderer. “Yeah. His wife, well, she slept with his best friend. He was heartbroken. Then his next girlfriend, she dumped him on his birthday.” Haha. Derek looks appropriately pitiful. And the blushing works for him. They are eating it up. He’s got it from here.
XXXX
“Quick question.”
“Okay,” And by okay I mean I am completely confused because Meredith Grey is talking to me. I was under the impression that she hated me by association.
“It’s half personal, is that alright?”
Now I’m really scared… “Yeah, that’s fine.”
“It’s actually about Sydney.”
“Okay,” I’m back to being confused.
“What does she like about general surgery?”
What? “Ummm… she likes it? I don’t know what you’re… she likes it. There’s a lot of stuff you know. She likes stuff. Different stuff, so general is good. She likes that there is so much to it. In the morning she might be removing a tumor from someone esophagus and by the end of her shift she’s repairing a ruptured bile duct. She likes that. Why?”
“I think… I used to like that me and Derek had the same specialty, it was kind of a bond, but lately it’s been kinda lackluster, I think I might need a change.”
“That will set you back a few years.”
“I think I’m okay with that. She likes the variety?”
“Ya. And it’s nice that we aren’t on the same service, we don’t usually take work home with us. Actually we never talk about work at home. We don’t even like each others jobs.” I’m trying to be supportive and reassuring, is it working? “You should ask Bailey.”
Her face lights up a bit, and it’s impossible not to smile back, when the woman smiles it’s the real thing, “Thanks Mark.”
I really miss having Meredith as my friend. We have a bond. We are the dirty mistresses. Did anyone consider my feelings when they decided to screw over my partner in crime.
I miss Meredith.
XXXX
“But I’m hungryyy,” I realize that I’m whining, but it’s been at least an hour since I was last fed. Being like 5 years pregnant makes me want everything thats food all the time -- which led to an interesting 2nd trimester when I wanted everything food and everything sex all the time. They combine well. You can do a lot with crackers and Cheez-Whiz.
“I just fed you.” Mark shifts Bea to his other arm and hands her a sippy cup of fruit juice, “We could get some picnic stuff and eat at one of those tables over there. Roxie must be starving by now. It’s been almost 15 minutes since you gave her that cookie.”
I really want that corn on the cob. Maybe I’ll get that for dinner. With steak. And potato salad. And brownies. With ice cream. And lemonade. “How hard do you think it will be for them to eat corn on the cob?”
Mark watches Bea drink her juice as she watches him with round eyes, “Hard. But cute.”
“I’ll bring the camera to the table then,” Where is the camera? The bathroom maybe? I was taking pictures of last nights bath… no, it’s in the hall closet. I was going to bring it today because these dresses are adorable. Thank you Baby Gap for having a bohemian baby line. Speaking of babies… I’m pretty sure that we brought two of them to the market this morning. “Mark? Where’s Roxie?”
“Derek has her.”
“Oh,” Oh! There he is! He’s talking to a woman! He’s talking to a woman! “Mark. He’s--”
“I know.”
“He’s talking to a woman.” He’s talking to a woman. He’s talking to a wooooooomaaaaaaaaan! “He’s flirting. He could date her. He could take her to restaurants and movies and he could stop hanging around us. Mark, he’s talking to a woman!” I’m way to excited about this. But Derek is talking to a woman!
“Come on Syd. He’s lonely. You’re the one that invited him over to dinner.”
“5 months ago. I thought he and Addison would have decided on a definite plan of attack by now.” I’m sick of Derek. He is mopey and morose. And he misses Addison and Addison is like… finding herself. And Meredith is like… insane. I don’t know how else to describe that whole… thing. I liked it better when she was stomping around and yelling, this is eerie and weird. No weirder then Addison -- but that I understand, and encourage. Derek is just… maybe he’s talking to women to make the other two jealous… “Mark? Do you think--”
“He’s not smooth enough to make Addison or Meredith jealous of anyone that isn’t Addison or Meredith. He knows it.”
Ya, that’s true. He needs to get laid. Stat.
“He misses her.”
“I know,”Ya. He certainly does. “But can’t he miss her some where that isn’t our house?”
“Derek can’t do anything by himself. And he’s going to help us move. He comes in handy. Hey, bunnies.”
Mark tugs the sippy cup from Bea’s hand and carries her over to a small enclosure that holds baby rabbits. He sets her on her feet and holds a bunny so she can pet and hug it. She goes from terrified to enamored in less then a minute, and if I don’t go over there she’s going to be the proud owner of a baby bunny because Mark has that look in his eye that says he’s completely in love and will do anything to keep that look on her face.
“Syd…”
It’s that voice, the soft dad voice that he started using when he’d read motorcycle maintenance articles to the twins well before their fetus selves developed ears or any sensory capabilities.
“No.” Where is… “Derek!” Roxanna should not be missing this, “Bring me back my child!” He’s very reluctant to walk away from this woman. She looks like a soccer mom. She’s wearing one of those matching track suits. At least it’s a cute one. “You should invite her to the Forth of July party,” I suggest as I point Roxie in the direction of her father and sister who have moved on to kittens. Mark wraps an arm around Roxie as she runs unsteadily into his arms and he plants a big kiss on her cheek. Who would have thought that he would be such a natural father.
“The party?”
He’s staring at her. He’s interested but I think it might be one of those passing things, like you’re interested when you are standing right in front of them but 20 minutes later you are distracted by something shiny or a sign for 2 for one cheeseburgers. “Invite her to the party Derek. Like a date.”
“Is...I mean,” he’s considering it, “Who else is going?”
Smooth. “Addison and all her minions are coming. I think Alex is coming with her too.”
“Okay…”
“Go ask her. Now. Go. GO!”
He listens, jogging across the market to her calling ‘Emily’. He’ll probably cancel on her by the Forth of July but it’s a start. Lonely Derek irks me. I mean I kinda understand the whole New York dynamic of Derek and Addison’s marriage now, they would have had Mark hanging off of them all the time. It’s hard to be a couple when there is a third person there. I mean, I’m kinda starting to think I’m married to both of them, like if they’re up watching a game and I want to go to bed I feel I should be kissing them both good night. That’s not normal. Although I don’t think I’ll ever be tempted to sleep with Derek -- the thing about adultery is that, in theory, you should trade up, which Addison did. I don’t think that cheating on Mark with Derek would be very logical. I also don’t know who a step up from Mark is. I think I’m on the top rung here. Unless Brad Pitt comes to town… it could happen.
“Syd? Can we get a puppy?”
Awwww. Every member of my family is holding a squirming ball of curly fur. People are looking at them and smiling, jealous, cause I serious have the most beautiful husband and children. I am the odd one out, they are picture perfect. A god-like man, adorable identical twins in matching dresses, abet in opposite colours, and me… 32 weeks pregnant with the worlds largest baby, swollen, sweating and starving. He carries over a puppy and puts it in my arms and dammit it’s adorable. “Mark, we can’t,” See I’m saying this but I’m not sure why we can’t. They are so cuuuute, “We are having a baby in 6 weeks… we… I… “ I really want the puppy.
“Oh, I know. God, we can’t get a puppy now Sydney. I was thinking when the girls are older, like 5. That’s a good age to get a puppy right? Junior will be 4, the girls will be starting school. We should get a puppy so we have something to play with.”
“Okay,” Yeah! We’re getting a puppy! And Derek talked to a woman! And we are getting a puppy!
XXXX