Memories...
In the last day or two, I've e-mailed back and forth with my ex-wife... (Yes, you read right... Why do people always act so shocked when I say this? HUH?) and I'm very surprised at the feelings washing up...
Guilt, sadness, nostalgia, missing her and our life...
Don't get me wrong... I wouldn't trade my current life, partner, gayness, etc. for anything... but I can't help but believe that all humans feel a certain loss when one life is left behind and another is taken up... No matter how much the old life didn't fit... I think I just tend to feel more intensely... Everything, it seems...
It's not an enormous pain like it used to be... But it's like the scar you have from a very serious injury... Sometimes, if you bang it on something just the right way, it still hurts a little bit...
I do miss her... and her family... and I do wish we lived in the same town...
Guilt, sadness, nostalgia, missing her and our life...
Don't get me wrong... I wouldn't trade my current life, partner, gayness, etc. for anything... but I can't help but believe that all humans feel a certain loss when one life is left behind and another is taken up... No matter how much the old life didn't fit... I think I just tend to feel more intensely... Everything, it seems...
It's not an enormous pain like it used to be... But it's like the scar you have from a very serious injury... Sometimes, if you bang it on something just the right way, it still hurts a little bit...
I do miss her... and her family... and I do wish we lived in the same town...