(no subject)
I'm a little burnt out. Tired. Dare I say: Lost?
I'm split in three ways right now. Work. Improv. Something else.
Improv/Sketch is going well. Except for the fact that I was late for my first house show with The Havercamps so I didn't get to perform. The rest of the team did awesome though. I got a little depressed afterwards - more so for not being part of a good show with my teammates than for not performing. I like the team. I hope I can keep up. Sideways House is going well. We've got some weird awesome opportunities coming up. Our show on the 17th@ the Fake Gallery on Melrose will have a couple people scouting some other groups; people that are kind of a big deal. We're hoping they'll like what they see in us. The rest of the group seems to have just as much stuff to do as I do… but I feel like I'm not putting enough into it. I hope I can keep up.
Work is going okay. I feel like I could be doing better. I'm a little worried that I'm not getting the projects that I want, but the next year looks pretty good for me. We've got a good group of people working together… I'm getting a lot of projects which involve establishing our procedure, rather than regular tasks. I like it. I hope I can keep up.
Something else. I don't know what to say about this. I have a lot to say, but not really to the internet. I am seriously torn. Sometimes without the slightest encouragement, it's easy to give up. Sometimes, trying so hard makes you drop the ball in other areas. I may need to stop trying. I just don't think I can keep up.
And it's this last thing ruling my world right now. I don't think it'll ever be possible to just "get over". I'm not entirely sure I want to get over it. It's depressing, really. Blah.
I don't know anymore.
Maybe I never did.
Ugh. I hate being like this.
It all seems so immature. But the reality is that I really feel like this. There are plenty of things to just "get over" and I do a pretty good job of not letting them bother me. I just thought there were a few things that you could treat as "real", and that these are the things that should matter, and should bother you. Actually, on that note, Fuck all the people saying to "Get Over" it. Fuck you.
I need some ice cream.
Edit: Wow. Began this a month ago, and thought I posted it. Went in here to update, and found it in my cache. Re-read it. It's still true.
Fuck you.
I'm split in three ways right now. Work. Improv. Something else.
Improv/Sketch is going well. Except for the fact that I was late for my first house show with The Havercamps so I didn't get to perform. The rest of the team did awesome though. I got a little depressed afterwards - more so for not being part of a good show with my teammates than for not performing. I like the team. I hope I can keep up. Sideways House is going well. We've got some weird awesome opportunities coming up. Our show on the 17th@ the Fake Gallery on Melrose will have a couple people scouting some other groups; people that are kind of a big deal. We're hoping they'll like what they see in us. The rest of the group seems to have just as much stuff to do as I do… but I feel like I'm not putting enough into it. I hope I can keep up.
Work is going okay. I feel like I could be doing better. I'm a little worried that I'm not getting the projects that I want, but the next year looks pretty good for me. We've got a good group of people working together… I'm getting a lot of projects which involve establishing our procedure, rather than regular tasks. I like it. I hope I can keep up.
Something else. I don't know what to say about this. I have a lot to say, but not really to the internet. I am seriously torn. Sometimes without the slightest encouragement, it's easy to give up. Sometimes, trying so hard makes you drop the ball in other areas. I may need to stop trying. I just don't think I can keep up.
And it's this last thing ruling my world right now. I don't think it'll ever be possible to just "get over". I'm not entirely sure I want to get over it. It's depressing, really. Blah.
I don't know anymore.
Maybe I never did.
Ugh. I hate being like this.
It all seems so immature. But the reality is that I really feel like this. There are plenty of things to just "get over" and I do a pretty good job of not letting them bother me. I just thought there were a few things that you could treat as "real", and that these are the things that should matter, and should bother you. Actually, on that note, Fuck all the people saying to "Get Over" it. Fuck you.
I need some ice cream.
Edit: Wow. Began this a month ago, and thought I posted it. Went in here to update, and found it in my cache. Re-read it. It's still true.
Fuck you.