Fast & Furious 6
I love movies. All kinds of movies. I love to think about movies and to write about movies, but sometimes I just want to go to the movies to ESCAPE. I want to disappear inside the dark theater and not have to think, not have to do anything but to lose myself in what’s happening on the screen.
One of the best ways to do that is to watch action movies that have no pretense to be anything other than action. This is why I love the Fast & Furious movies. They’re about cars, cars, cars, some love, some alternative family and some more cars. They’re about bad guys who are good guys, free agents who drive fast and hard, who live by a code of loyalty, and who stand by each other’s side while the engines roar. Also, the guys include girls who kick ass too, and that’s definitely an added bonus.
So last week I was going to go see Frances Ha, but I knew that the state of my life would allow no patience for Noah Baumbach’s annoying art school privileged pretension. So instead, I dumped Noah Baumbauch and decided on Vin Diesel and Fast & Furious 6 instead. It was definitely the right decision.
I’m not even going to try to tell you about the plot because plot is inconsequential in these movies. What matters is watching fast cars, kick ass girls, bald-on-bald men, and a love story wrapped in V8 engines. Here is a list of some of my favorite things about the movie:
Vin Diesel: He’s so damn cute, sweet, and sincere. He has one of the best voices on the planet, and he seems so damn authentic even if he is a construction. Unlike Jean Claude Van Damme (who I also loved in 1990s), Vin Diesel’s character in Fast & Furious is deeply connected to community and his alternative family. Van Damme was always a lone agent who was very overtly “queered” in his movies. Vin Diesel is branded hetero while still emitting plenty of queerness to satisfy the gay audience.
The Bald-on-Bald scenes with federal agent Dwayne Johnson and Vin Diesel’s Dominic Toretto are gay as gay gets. They obviously love playing cat and mouse together, and the fact that they are on opposite teams (the feds versus the crooks) yet they join forces allows for plenty of queerly banter. There is a scene at the end of the movie when the two bald muscle bound men stand cheek-to-cheek that is so queer-charged that I actually shouted out “Just kiss!” during the movie. Swear.
Love and alternative family: But this car movie isn’t just a vehicle for bald men queer fetishism. It’s also a love story about Dominic (Vin Diesel) and the love of his life Letty (Michelle Rodriguez). The love story is so great because it manifests itself in untraditional ways. For one thing, in F&F 6 Letty doesn’t even remember who Dominic is and in fact shoots him and is on Team Bad Guy. Also, their love is most sexy and romantic when they are street racing against each other through the streets of London in their most awesome (separate) cars. Dominic drives a 1969 Dodge Charger Daytona while Letty roars through the streets in a 1971 Jensen Interceptor. The hottest sexiest energy between the characters is when they are behind the wheel or under the hood together as individuals who know how the fuck to drive a fast mean machine.
Letty and Dominic are all part of the extended alternative family that is central to Fast & Furious. They are a band of multi-racial cast-offs from LA who make a lot of money by robbing bad rich guys. Even when Letty shoots Dominic, he remains true to her because (in classic Diesel Fortune Cookie Ethics), “You don’t turn your back on family, even when they do.” This code actually sat pretty well with me at this current moment in my life when everything around me seems to becoming undone by the shit economy and the pressures it is wreaking in my life. I really could use some Muscle Car Loyalty and Escapism about now.
Working Class Heroes and the Cars They Drive: At the core of Fast & Furious 6, the working class rules. At the end of the movie, even though Diesel and “family” can have anything they want, all they want is their old house in East L.A. with a garage where they can work on cars. And working on cars is not restricted to the men in this “family”. There are plenty of scenes with Letty wielding a wrench under the hood. For these guys and girls, cars are first, and the love of driving them and working on them bonds the family together. Fucking A. I’m down with the simplicity of that.
Girls Kick Ass: Fast & Furious movies aren’t just about testosterone on parade. The girls kick equal ass. Not only do the lead females do their fair share of driving and taking assholes down, but they know how to work on cars and know how to fight. F&F 6 features two awesome Bitch Fights where Letty and federal agent Riley go at each other in extended scenes that show these two women can fight as good as (if not better than) any man (bald or not). The best thing about the Bitch Fights is that Letty and Riley switch sides at the end of the movie, when Riley reveals that she’s actually on Team Bad Guy not Team Good Guy. That’s a sweet twist - Bitch Fighting Side Switching! This may sound sexy, but the girls in this movie are totally tough as nails and just as bad ass as the men. They are rough and tough, and there is not a butt thong or obligatory titty shot with the female leads. There are plenty of “accessory girls” in the street race scenes, but the girls who “matter” kick major ass and do not fall prey to Hollywood stereotypes.
Plotless Plot: There is a plot to this movie. A bad guy wants to find a bunch of “components” which will somehow allow him to, well you know, like take over the world or something. I love how the “components” are never really identified in any specific terms. They will do something like sabotage information systems, blackout entire countries, or some shit like that. But really the movie is just about Team Diesel chasing “the component” so he can reclaim the love of his life Letty and everyone can get back to the business of working on and driving cars. Cars, loyalty, love and more cars are what matter. Getting the component is only a way of maintaining priorities. (e.g. cars, loyalty, love and more cars).
Also, chasing the component allows Dominic/Diesel to perform a great act of heroism by flinging himself to near death to capture Letty when she catapults off a tank. We can all go, “Yay! Love wins!”
In the end, the crooks’ loyalty (Diesel and crew) extends to the feds (Dwayne Johnson) because and they reciprocate their commitment to “doing the right thing” which means choosing allegiance to “family” (which is not the traditional family but the alternative family created by bonding outside of the system) over allegiance to money and power. Though, we have to remember that they have made a shitload of money on their escapades because this is a Hollywood fantasy, but it’s a fantasy that works for me when I need escape. Cars, bald-on-bald men, love, and more cars. Fucking A.
Fast & Furious 6 is another installment in the F&F enterprise that delivers a piece of full throttled high octane cinematic candy for anyone who loves cars and loves the idea that love can come in a V8 engine and be true blue (collar) even in these cynical money grubbing times.
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