(no subject)
sometimes it get's really hard here.....
I have friends but I haven't made any solid FRIEND friends ya know?? like a danielle or kelly or even an amy. I'm not trying to replace them, I just want the friendships everyone else has on my hall. Everyone has someone to go to whenever they have some kind of problem and they have someone who they are always with....I don't have that. I have a few friends and at first I thought I was "in" but the more I think about it, the more I realize that they just sorta cling to each other.. They don't invite me anywhere....ever. They all have inside jokes and spend HOURS after classes just hanging out...why aren't I invited?? I try sometimes to join in and hang out but sometimes I feel like i'm interfering with what they're doing and so I just go in my room and sit on facebook all day or do my homework *this having no real friends is doing wonders on my grades* And if I do get invited I feel like they only invited me because I was standing there and they thought they were being nice when all they were doing was wasting their time b/c they just ignored me the whole time. People take advantage of me too. They ask me to do outrageous favors and think of me as some small feeble person. Was I always like this?? Did I do something wrong? I miss my friends back in va beach.....if they were here they'd understand. Danielle called me last night and it felt SO good to hear from her. Even tho it was only for a few minutes, I was able to relax and be myself a bit more but once the conversation was over I'm back to being over looked. I felt so upset that I just sat there and thought "why can't I have a friendship here that is similar to what danielle and I have? Or kelly and I?" It's kinda pointless to write all of this in here. The people who do all of this don't even know what livejournal is...but maybe the people who do can help me. I try and get out there and do things and talk with people but they don't seem to want to connect with me like they do with others...
I don't know maybe I'm just being dumb
but one thing is for sure
I could really use a kelly or danielle right now....
<3
I have friends but I haven't made any solid FRIEND friends ya know?? like a danielle or kelly or even an amy. I'm not trying to replace them, I just want the friendships everyone else has on my hall. Everyone has someone to go to whenever they have some kind of problem and they have someone who they are always with....I don't have that. I have a few friends and at first I thought I was "in" but the more I think about it, the more I realize that they just sorta cling to each other.. They don't invite me anywhere....ever. They all have inside jokes and spend HOURS after classes just hanging out...why aren't I invited?? I try sometimes to join in and hang out but sometimes I feel like i'm interfering with what they're doing and so I just go in my room and sit on facebook all day or do my homework *this having no real friends is doing wonders on my grades* And if I do get invited I feel like they only invited me because I was standing there and they thought they were being nice when all they were doing was wasting their time b/c they just ignored me the whole time. People take advantage of me too. They ask me to do outrageous favors and think of me as some small feeble person. Was I always like this?? Did I do something wrong? I miss my friends back in va beach.....if they were here they'd understand. Danielle called me last night and it felt SO good to hear from her. Even tho it was only for a few minutes, I was able to relax and be myself a bit more but once the conversation was over I'm back to being over looked. I felt so upset that I just sat there and thought "why can't I have a friendship here that is similar to what danielle and I have? Or kelly and I?" It's kinda pointless to write all of this in here. The people who do all of this don't even know what livejournal is...but maybe the people who do can help me. I try and get out there and do things and talk with people but they don't seem to want to connect with me like they do with others...
I don't know maybe I'm just being dumb
but one thing is for sure
I could really use a kelly or danielle right now....
<3