Fic: Eh-oh! reverse big bang

[kazie_oh]

title Eh-oh!
genre SPN RPF, AU
pairing J2, mentions of Jared/Sandy
disclaimer Complete fiction. I own neither the people herein nor am I in any way connected to the Teletubbies. No harm intended, please don't sue!
rating PG-13
word count 10,700
feedback concrit most welcome!
warnings mentions of off-screen drug use
summary Jensen has been trying to make it as an actor in LA when he finally gets his first proper position - as Dipsy on the Teletubbies.
notes oh my goood it's finally done. *collapses* This turned out WAY longer than originally planned. Written for spn_reversebang, art prompt 2042. Major thank you to 13chapters and weimar27 for beta. All remaining errors are, of course, mine.
Of course, thank you to seelentraene for the art! Make sure to go check out the art post here!

Eh-oh!

Jensen listened to his agent cheerily wish him good luck, and then the snick of the call ending, with equal parts dread and excitement. He'd just been offered his first proper acting job. After countless auditions, a couple of commercials and two minute roles in bad television series, he had been on the brink of giving up and moving back to Texas. Or at least somewhere Hollywood couldn’t taunt him with all of the opportunities just out of reach. But now he didn’t have to, since he had just been offered the spot as one of four leads on a television show. It would mean he could stop living on ramen noodles, could fix his piece of shit car, and finally, finally get his big jump into the world of acting.

The downside? It was fucking Teletubbies.

“Chris!” he bellowed as he threw his phone on his bed and ran downstairs to find his roommate.

~~~

“You done yet?” Jensen scowled as he waited for Chris to stop wheezing long enough to respond. “You do realize that you’re mocking your own job right now?”

“It’s jus- it’s-“ Chris wiped his eyes, looked up at Jensen who was pacing in their tiny kitchen, before thumping his hand on the table and collapsing into another fit of giggles. “They called you to fill in for Alex?”

“How is this my life?” Jensen sat down opposite Chris and softly hit his forehead against the table. And then did it again.

“Cheer up, Jen. It’s a job! It’s what you’ve been waiting for! And,” he reached over to poke Jensen in the ribs. “You get to work with me. Every day.”

“I hate you.”

“And wear ridiculous huge costumes that make you sweat like a motherfucker.”

“So fucking much.”

“And wiggle your hips and use that squeaky voice.”

“This will ruin any chance I had of being taken seriously as an actor.”

“Oh, please.” Chris stood up and went to the fridge, pulling out a beer, still snickering. “You never had a chance of that anyway.”

~~~

Bright and early the next morning Jensen caught a ride with Chris to set. His coffee-filled travel mug leaked warmth into his palms and through his jeans, where it was resting against his thigh.

“So tell me again,” he said after a yawn. “Who - I mean what - am I acting, again?”

Chris turned the radio down as he merged onto the freeway.

“You’ll be Dipsy, the green one. I’m Laa-Laa, Richard is Po, and Jared is Tinky-Winky.”

Jensen groaned.

“Hey now, stay positive. Once you get over how ridiculous this show is, it’s actually kind of fun.”

“You do realize that the demographic is children under the age of three and stoners?”

“Aww, Jenny. You’re just upset that no one’s going to see your pretty face when you’re in costume.” Chris reached over to ruffle Jensen’s hair.

“Stop it, you freak!” Jensen batted his hands away and held his coffee protectively against his chest. “Jesus. Eyes on the road.”

A while later they were at the studio and Jensen was being introduced to the crew as Chris disappeared. Some of them he remembered from the audition, but most were faces he’d never seen before, although he could recognize a few from Chris’ stories.

“Thank you very much for being available on such short notice,” one of the producers, Danneel Harris, told him as she shook his hand vigorously, wearing a black blazer with red hair in a smooth pony tail. “We really want to try to stick to the schedule as much as we can, so imagine our happiness that one of our runners up for Dipsy’s position is still available, after Alex broke his leg.”

Jensen just nodded and smiled, and tried to ignore the subtle jab at him having been unemployed for the last few months. Although he knew he hadn’t been absolutely terrible at the auditions, there had probably been several people they would have picked over him, but they were all busy on other assignments now.

“It’s a pretty bad break, so there is no telling when he’ll be able to return. So if this works out, we’ll welcome you to the cast as our new Dipsy. I take it your agent told you about the contract?”

They went over some details before she ushered him on to meet more people. He met Misha Collins, the visionary behind the remake of Teletubbies for the American market. Jeffrey Morgan came down from the offices to shake his hand, and he waved to lighting, sound, camera crews, and PAs. Finally, it was time to meet his co-stars.

Danneel led him to Wardrobe, where he saw Chris’s upper half sticking out of yellow padded fuzzy pants that covered his entire foot like a sock. The contrast of that with Chris’s long hair and tank-top clad chest was ridiculous and Jensen tried hard to suppress a snort. Chris had told him what was involved, of course, and Jensen had seen his share of Teletubbies youtube videos, but Chris had resolutely refused to share any pictures. Said Jensen was going to have to wait for the TV release like the rest of the world.

Chris smirked at him. “Like what you see, Jensen?”

“Oh that’s right, you guys know each other?”

A guy with floppy hair and a beard that seemed a few weeks old holding another giant Teletubbie costume - red, this time - stood up from where he was sitting next to Chris and extended his arm towards Jensen.

“Hi, I’m Richard. I’ve barely been able to put up with this asshole for the last months only ‘cause I get paid to, can’t believe you do it voluntarily.”

Jensen liked him already. “Yeah, what can I say. He’s pretty pathetic, but someone has to keep him in line.”

“Hey!” Chris stood up and walked towards them, but got tangled up in his giant costume and tripped over the head as it dragged on the floor. “Son of a… fuck.”

Jensen snorted full out this time.

“What’s going on?” A really tall guy with floppy brown hair walked into the room with a big grin on his face.

“Our new Dipsy is what’s going on,” Richard answered. “Jared, this is Jensen. Jensen, Tinky-Winky.” He waved his hand at them in succession, clearly considering it an introduction well done.

“You’re the guy filling in for Alex? Great! I mean, great to meet you, not great that Alex is in the hospital. Well, it’s great that he’s able to be in the hospital, but not great that he - um.” Jared trailed off and his grin faltered slightly.

“Great to meet you too. And not that Alex is in the hospital.” Jensen extended his hand, smiling.

“Yeah.” Jared grinned and flicked his hair out of his eyes as he shook Jensen’s hand.

~~~

“You’re kidding me, right?”

“Nope. No joking involved whatsoever.” Misha sounded proud.

Jensen couldn’t believe his own eyes. The set was huge. Green grass and a blue sky that looked so real it was almost impossible to believe they were indoors, until you spotted the lighting rigs and all the equipment in the background. It reminded Jensen of the original Teletubbies set, a large hilly field with a building in the middle. Bright primary colors were everywhere, plastic flowers scattered on the grass, but it was the house that captured Jensen’s attention. The walls were gray with rainbow colored trim, and a weird contraption on top that looked like a tower. It was all oversized and there didn’t seem to be a single straight line. Everything was curved, the door was round, the windows were oblong, and the entire house was circular.

“Come on, wait till you see the inside. We’re really trying to emphasize the giants from space aspect.”

~~~

“No, more in the hips. Larger movements!”

Jensen tried his best to comply, really fucking glad that no one could see his face through the Teletubbie costume.

“Remember, you’re a toddler. A giant toddler in a fat suit. You have to exaggerate if it’s going to translate onto the screen.”

Cursing, Jensen swiveled his hips more and flailed his arms around as Misha Collins tried to school him in the art of being a Teletubbie. This really wasn’t what he’d expected when he moved to LA to try to make it as an actor.

“Better, much better! Don’t worry, you’ll get it after a while. Frolicking around with the other Tubbies will help.” Jensen stopped and stared at Misha through the black net of the Tubbie eyes.

“Frolicking?”

“Yes. You know,” he waved his hand in the air. “Frolicking. Dancing, prancing, walking, jumping, whatever it is that you Tubs do together.

“Right.”

“And of course, there’s the higher education, if you’re so inclined.”

Jensen looked questioningly at Misha before remembering that the only thing he’d see when looking at Jensen was a giant green freak with a teddy bear face and a felt stick coming out of his head. “What do you mean?”

Misha stepped closer. “I’m sure you can find some old school Teletubbies videos around somewhere. Use them as an - inspiration.” He wagged his eyebrows at Jensen conspiratorially.

“Right,” Jensen said again.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. Danneel said they didn’t want to overwhelm him on the first day, and they needed to redo the production schedule anyway to make up for the delay of losing Alex. Jensen waited until Chris was done, they drove home, and Jensen passed out on the couch in front of the television.

~~~

Before Jensen knew it, it was time to rehearse their first scene. Running through lines only took a few minutes, as much of the show was narrated, and the rest were mostly high-pitched squealing noises that were dubbed onto the film later. That would make this a seriously easy gig, if it weren’t for the fucking costumes.

“Are you fucking kidding me with this?” Jensen said to Chris, voice pitched low as they were being directed where to stand.

“Hey now, this is a children’s show.” Misha had apparently heard them, even though he was standing several feet away.

“The cameras aren’t rolling, Misha,” Chris replied. “We can say what the fuck we want.”

“I guess.” Misha tilted his head. “Still. It might affect the energy. We don’t want to do anything that would alienate our audience, and their parents. Now, where is my goddamn coffee?” He wandered away, presumably in search of a PA or a coffee maker.

“Is that - normal, for him?” Jensen asked.

“What, Misha?” Chris replied, his attention back on his blocking. “There is no such thing as normal, for Misha. Unless abnormal is normal. In which case it isn’t abnormal anymore. Huh. Hey, that’s kinda deep.”

Jensen shook his head at the smug grin on Chris’s face. “Remind me again why I’m friends with you.”

“Because I drag you to auditions that end up landing you a job, that’s why.”

Jensen couldn’t really dispute that.

~~~

One day, in Teletubbie Land, Po and Tinky-Winky decided to hold hands.

Jensen watched Richard and Jared - Po and Tinky Winky, he reminded himself - do their Tubbie walk onto set. He knew he should be studying their movements, trying to pick up on how to best act like a Tubbie in these huge costumes, but there was no chance he was going to be able to focus if this continued like this.

“Oh, Tinky-Winky! Holding hands!” he heard Po say in a ridiculously high and squeaky voice that he did not recognize as Richard at all.

“Holding hands!” Tinky-Winky replied. They’d linked their arms together and jumped and wiggled around, smiling.

Then it was Jensen’s and Chris’s turn.

So Dipsy and Laa-Laa decided to hold hands too.

“Dipsy!”

“Laa-Laa.”

“We’re holding hands!”

And Dipsy decided to hold hands with Po.

Then, Tinky-Winky decided to hold hands with Laa-Laa.

Then all the Teletubbies were holding hands.

The four of them were standing in a circle on the green field, holding hands, smiling and making happy Tubbie noises.

Jensen didn’t know how to handle this situation. As an actor, he thought he was reasonably good at keeping a straight face even when something funny happened, but in this case the scene was so absurd it went right over funny and landed somewhere near pure madness. He burst out laughing.

“You have to get inside Dipsy’s head, Jensen! Only that way can you really transmit what’s going on to the camera,” Misha yelled after he signaled to cut.

Jensen rolled his eyes so hard he almost strained something before taking a deep breath and trying again, imagining himself as a giant green alien with eyes the size of saucers. At least he was being entertained as his career went down the drain.

~~~

“So we should hang out. You know, get to know each other,” Jared said before taking a bite of his burger.

“Awesome. Drinks tonight? Usual place?” Chris replied.

“I’m in, although I probably won’t stay too long. Wife wants to see me every once in a while, and all that,” Richard said. The four of them were sitting at a table in the cafeteria where the food was surprisingly good a few days after Jensen started. Maybe not everything about this job sucked.

“How about you, Jensen?” Jared looked straight at him and gave him that grin, and there were dimples involved. Okay, so definitely not everything about this job sucked.

“Sure,” he replied. “What is the usual place?”

“Oh, it’s great! It’s this tiny place not too far from here, we went there after the first day of shooting and have been back a few times since. You’ll love it, I bet.” Jared was still grinning.

“You’ve been there, Jen. I took you there a few weeks after I started here, we went with Mike and Tom, remember?”

“Oh! Is that the place where Tom did the thing? With the waitress?”

Chris smirked. “Yep, the very place. D’you remember how he-”

“On a napkin!” they said in unison before breaking into laughter. “Oh man,” Jensen said, still giggling. “That was the best night.” When he looked up he saw that Jared was still smiling, but looked a little confused. “Sorry.”

“Oh, that’s totally cool. I just forgot you guys know each other.”

“Know each other!” Chris snorted and punched Jensen’s shoulder. “More like, live together. By the way, we’re out of toilet paper.”

“Fuck you,” Jensen replied. “I’m eating.”

~~~

That evening all four of them were nestled in a booth at a bar, sharing a large plate of nachos.

“I think you’ll be alright. Really have that inner Dipsy, you know? Just got to learn to channel it better.” Richard thumped Jensen hard on the back so he almost chocked on his beer.

“Thanks, I guess?”

“I mean, we all got some time to get used to the costumes and our characters, but you’re just jumping straight in there. Hitting the ground running.” Richard munched on nachos slathered in cheese. “You know,” he said thoughtfully, taking a break from chewing and waving the half-eating nacho around. “I think being a Teletubbie is a noble job.”

Jared snorted.

“No, seriously. Children’s education is so important. Just look at all the crap that’s out there. I think that we should feel honored to be a part of this project. Molding the generations of the future, and all that.”

“Right,” Jensen said.

“I mean, it’s not like we’re teaching them Spanish or how to do math, or anything. All we do is jump around and wave at things,” Jared added.

“Doesn’t matter! It’s developmentally appropriate. I wish I’d had something like this to watch when I was growing up. So much better than Sesame Street, or He-Man.”

“Dude, shut up,” Chris said. “You are so full of shit.”

Richard’s eyes were crinkling and Jared burst out laughing. He laughed with his whole body, hair flopping into his eyes, shoulders shaking, hand slamming on the table. Jensen couldn’t help but get swept up and then all four of them were laughing. Maybe this job wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

A while later Richard excused himself, said the wife was going to start clobber him if he didn’t start spending more time with her, and Chris went to take a piss.

“So, tell me,” Jensen said, leaning forward on the table. It was just him and Jared now, the beer was buzzing pleasantly through Jensen’s veins, and he felt a need to get to know Jared better. Especially his dimples. There was just something about them that made Jensen want to stare at them all night long. “Did you watch the original Teletubbies growing up?”

“Oh come on, I’m not that young,” Jared said, flipping his hair out of his face.

“But did you ever... you know.”

“What?”

“You know! Do I really have to spell it out for you?”

Jared looked puzzled.

“Come on. What is the second biggest demographic for the Teletubbies?”

“Parents of small children?”

Jensen rolled his eyes. If this was any other time and place, if he was less drunk or the person he was talking to was any less attractive than Jared, this would be the time when he’d be getting pissed off. But he liked Jared.

“College students.”

“Right.”

“So...” Jensen waved his hand around. “Did you ever?”

“Oh! You mean get high and watch the Teletubbies?”

Jensen nodded and took a swig of his beer. “That’s it.”

“Nah. I didn’t really go to college. I dropped out in my first year to become a famous Hollywood actor.” Jared picked at the label on his beer.

“Oh. Well. Sorry ‘bout that” Jensen cringed. That was a stupid thing to say. They were all in the same boat, and Jensen definitely didn’t like getting reminded of his failure in that department.

“What, are you kidding me?” Jared laughed. “I have the best job ever!”

Jensen blinked.

“You mean… you like being Tinky Winky?”

“Hell yeah,” Jared replied, grinning. “I get paid for goofing around! It’s kind of perfect for me. And when this show wraps my agent says I shouldn’t have any problem moving into a different role for children’s television. I don’t see how I could want anything else.”

“Huh.”

Jared’s grin faltered. “What. You don’t like being a Tubbie?”

Jensen stammered. “Uhm. I mean, sure? It’s just… not what I had anticipated, for my first role on television.”

“Oh. That makes sense.”

Jensen exhaled. Shit. He needed to be more careful with his judging of the giant toddlers from space.

“And it also just happened so quickly, you know? I haven’t really had time to adjust.”
Jared chuckled. “Yeah, I guess being dropped right in the middle of the set could freak anyone out.”

“No kidding. I mean, seriously, what’s with the giant vacuum?”

Jared did the laugh thing again, where he threw his head back and slapped the table, and Jensen was only able to resist for about three seconds before joining in.

Another hour and a couple of more beers later saw Jensen leaning a bit more into Jared’s space, but he didn’t seem to mind. The more they talked, the more he saw of his dimples, of his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed down his beer, the more he heard about his Texas childhood, and of the stupid stuff he, Richard, Alex and Chris got up to on set, the more he liked him.

“So did you watch the Teletubbies growing up?” Jared asked. His face was slightly flushed and his hair curved softly in front of his ears.

“Nah, not really. But I have a buddy who went to college in Missouri. He called me up sometimes to let me know when they were on.”

“Seriously?”

“Yep.” Jensen smirked. “It was on their campus calendar.”

Jared’s eyes went huge. “You’re shitting me. You are totally shitting me.”

“Swear to god, man. It was some kind of cult following.”

They were still laughing when Chris came back to tell them he was leaving with the girl he’d been chatting up since he ran into her on his way back from the restroom.

“So…” Jared said hesitantly when Chris had clapped Jensen on the shoulder and given them the thumbs up before rushing back to his date for the night. “You and Chris…”

Jensen stretched out his legs under the table, the clamor of glasses banging, people yelling, and music in his ears. “Hmm? Me and Chris what?”

“You know.” Jared waved his hand in the air. “You guys live together, right?”

“Oh. Oh! No. Me and Chris, hah, never. God, no.” Jensen shuddered. “Have you seen what he’s like when he eats? It’s disgusting. Plus, he doesn’t really swing that way.”

“But. Um. Do you?”

Jensen looked at Jared. He was almost - dare he think it? - adorable. He was staring very intently at the label of his bottle, now almost completely gone, long fingers poking at the small pieces stuck in the glue. There was a crease between his eyebrows, and broad shoulders filled out the worn gray t-shirt. Jensen was generally pretty good at reading people’s signals, and right now Jared was sending out vibes Jensen was only too happy to respond to. It maybe wasn’t the best idea, considering they worked together, but whether the reason was alcohol or one too many long nights with just his right hand, right now Jensen really didn’t care. He was just about to tell Jared that yes, he did indeed, and this humongous ridiculously attractive human version of Tinky Winky was welcome in his bed any time, preferably starting tonight, when he heard a phone ring.

“Hold on,” Jared said, digging into his pocket to retrieve a gadget blasting out the newest
Lady Gaga song. “Hello?” He held up his finger to Jensen, who nodded and used the opportunity to polish off the rest of his beer. He was in a very good mood. Even though his new job kind of sucked, at least he was on set, and getting paid. He was having a great night, and if his suspicions were right it was only about to get better.

“Tonight? Really? But it’s-…”

Jensen glanced back over at Jared. The creases were back on his forehead, and the hand that wasn’t holding the phone was drumming an erratic rhythm on the table.

“Everything alright?” Jensen said after Jared ended the call.

“Yeah! Yeah. That was uh, that was Sandy.”

“Sandy who works in lighting?” Jensen remembered her. Sweet girl with dark hair and a gorgeous smile.

“Yeah. She uh, well. We’d kind of talked about meeting up tonight, but then she had this concert.”

Jensen felt himself quickly sobering up, something tightening in his stomach. “Are you and Sandy…” he trailed off. “Together?”

“No! I mean, we’ve been on a few dates, if that’s what you mean. But it’s not-“

Quickly, Jensen plastered on a big grin. “Hey, that’s awesome. She’s hot. Hey, would you look at the time? I really should start heading home. Scripts to read tomorrow and all that.” He stood up, fished his wallet out of his pocked and threw some bills down on the table. “I’ll catch you later, alright?” He clapped Jared on the shoulder, still smiling, turned around and walked outside where he frowned. The LA air was only slightly cooler than the inside of the club, but it was still a welcome help in clearing his head. Shit, he’d almost hit on his straight coworker. It had been a while since he’d gotten signals mixed up that badly. What was he thinking anyway, it wasn’t a remotely good idea to get involved with a person he was going to see on set every day for the foreseeable future. Stupid, stupid. He hailed a cab, deliberately thought about nothing on the way, and went straight to bed.

~~~

The next day of shooting Jensen showed up prepared and ready. Misha had given him a set of dailies and other footage they had of Alex to prepare with, and he and Chris had gotten drunk while watching them on Saturday night. Jensen did his best imitation of Dipsy’s signature hip wiggles so enthusiastically that he ended up knocking over their floor lamp, and Chris laughed so hard that he had beer almost coming out of his nose.

Although it had turned into being mostly entertainment at the time, Jensen felt a lot more confident in his Teletubbie skills by now. This wasn’t Jensen’s ideal role, but it was his now and he was going to make the best of it.

The scene they were shooting today was about the Tubbies jumping in puddles. Chris had finished putting on his costume and went for the set, but it took Jensen a little longer to get everything sitting right. He was shoving his arms into the armholes when Jared walked in.

“Hey.”

Jensen grunted a reply. He didn’t understand. Turning himself into Dipsy hadn’t been a picnic last week but at least he’d made it, but now it was like his knuckles were too big to get into the hands.

“You all right?” Jared put his jacked down on a bench and walked towards Jensen. And just like that, all those thoughts of Friday night he’d tried so hard to suppress over the weekend all came back.

“Yeah, fine, just… this stupid costume doesn’t fit right.”

“That’s ‘cause you’ve turned it backwards. Hold on.” Jared tugged on the arm Jensen was trying to shove himself into and untwisted it. “Now, try again.” He held it up, Jensen stuck his arm into it and now it slid right home.

“Thanks.”

“No problem. Happens to us all.” He was still standing there, right in front of Jensen. He could see how his hazel eyes peered at him through his bangs, the mole on the side of his nose, and his lips turned up in a small smile that was ridiculously sweet. A small one, so that the dimples weren’t as visible as in the big grins he sometimes threw out.

“So, I was wondering.”

Jensen licked his lips and realized that he was probably staring. “Yeah?”

“Do you want to maybe, like, I don’t know. Have coffee some time?” Jared was biting his lip and Jensen tore his gaze up to his eyes. After a second’s hesitation he continued. “I mean, I know we work together, so…”

Wasn’t this just perfect. Jared was being nice, and offering to hang out with the new guy on set, and all Jensen wanted to do was thread his hands into that soft-looking hair, haul him down and kiss him breathless.

Jensen needed to get a grip. And not on the hair. So he turned to his favourite coping mechanism - evasion.

“That sounds great. We should totally do coffee some day. So how was your date with Sandy?” He plastered on his most neutral expression and hoped that he looked more like a friendly coworker and not someone who lusted after people with girlfriends.

The smile disappeared and Jared looked perplexed. For a second it was like Jared had been hoping for a different reply, and Jensen almost wanted to take it back. But then he smiled. “It was great. Come on, we’re starting soon.”

Jensen seriously needed to check is wishful thinking. He almost screwed things up again. He finished pulling on his Dipsy costume and then waddled onto set, ready to jump in some fake puddles.

~~~

The days passed and Jensen got more used to being Dipsy. The costume became like second skin, he knew how to move in it (the trick was to bend the knees), how to master the facial expressions, and how to hold onto things with the giant paws. He and Chris had a blast goofing around as their Tubbie selves, and Misha seemed pleased with the scenes the two of them did together. Richard also really grew on Jensen, and he found himself tremendously entertained by his dry sense of humor and exuberant laugh, that more often than not was aimed at himself. And Jared - well. Jensen found himself liking Jared more and more as well. A little too much, actually. As much as he tried to remind himself that Jared wasn’t interested, that he wasn’t available, and even if he was, it would be a bad idea to get involved with a coworker, he couldn’t deny that he had a crush. A humongous crush that grew every day. It wasn’t Jensen’s fault that Jared was pretty much exactly his type. Really fucking tall, broad shoulders, narrow waist, and long capable fingers. It was those damn dimples. Or just his smile in general. Plus, Jared had a wicked sense of humor that he whipped out when Jensen least expected it. He tried to keep his distance from Jared but it was impossible, considering their work, so he pretty much resigned himself to just pining from very close proximity. Sometimes he thought he noticed Jared looking at him, but it never lasted long enough for him to be sure. Wishful thinking. Occasionally Sandy joined them for lunch, or during breaks from filming. She and Jared seemed to get along well, and as much as a part of Jensen wanted to dislike her, he found that he couldn’t. Instead, he made sure that he had an excuse for leaving whenever it looked like he was going to be alone with Jared, or Jared and Sandy, to avoid any awkward situations. They were probably starting to suspect he had a bladder problem.

A few weeks after Jensen took over as Dipsy they were shooting a scene taking place inside the Tubbie house. The Tubbies were making toast, which meant that large pancake-like circles with a smiley face on them came shooting out of a machine.

“Making toast!” Dipsy said.

“Yummy!” said Laa-Laa.

Jensen held a piece of smiley toast between his paws, sitting at the giant round table. “Dipsy loves toast!” he said in his best Dipsy voice.

“Wheee!” Po came jumping into the house. “Toast?” She jumped over to the machine and pressed a couple of buttons. “Po loves toast!”

But there was a loud sound. Oh no! What did Po do?

“Uh oh,” Po said, as pieces of toast began to shoot out of the machine.

They paused as the technicians started the mechanism that flung the foam pancakes at them.

“Uh oh,” said Laa-Laa as toast flew close to her head and bounced off the walls.

“Uh oh,” said Dipsy as toast hit him in the shoulder.

It was Tinky Winky’s line now, but all Jensen heard was the thunk thunk of the giant pancakes hitting against the wall. He didn’t really want to turn his head, considering the pancake projectile missiles flying everywhere. He was covered with padding on all sides, but instincts die hard. Jensen glanced over, as far as he could through the netting of Dipsy’s eyes, and saw that Tinky Winky was doubled over with hands covering his head.

Jensen heard someone yell cut and the machine stopped shooting out foam pancakes.

“Are you alright, dude?” he said as he rushed over to where Jared was.

Jared was shaking. Jensen started to worry, but then he heard the laughter.

“I’m sorry!” he wheezed. “It’s just - it’s so ridiculous.” He flopped over on his chair, his purple Tubby arms and legs spread out as he laughed.

Tension left Jensen’s body like a deflating balloon. Tinky Winky - Jared - laughing, without Tinky Winky’s facial expressions following, was a bizarre sight.

Richard took off Po’s head. “What? Are you saying that this genius combination of Po’s love of toast and of all things mischievous, plus some technological malfunction, isn’t brilliant?”

Jared struggled to take off Tinky Winky’s head, still laughing. “How on earth does that make any sense?” His hair was sticking in all directions and his grin reached from ear to ear. Jensen couldn’t but laugh too. Before he knew it all four of them were collapsed in a fit of giggles.

“I guess we’ll take fifteen,” he heard Misha say.

Jensen met Jared’s eyes and his stomach almost cramped, he was laughing so hard, and saw that Jared was in no better condition. It was at moments like this that Jensen almost really loved his job.

He then saw Sandy run onto the set and bound up to Jared. “Are you holding up shooting again, baby?” she said before kissing his cheek.

Jensen didn’t care. Really. He scrubbed the heel of his hand over his face, took a few deep breaths, and went to find a bottle of water before they started up again.

~~~

They managed to finish shooting the scene with the flying pancakes with minimal casualties. Over the next few weeks they had several similar incidents where laughing was much more important than the shooting schedule. Jensen’s favorite was the one with the space ship.
Jensen got his car fixed but he and Chris had gotten in the habit of carpooling so they continued to save on gas, as they had the same schedule most days anyway. They clashed a few times from spending this much time together - working together, living together, commuting together - but a day or so of cooling off was usually enough to restore balance. Being a Tubbie was physically hard work, and Jensen passed out as a log after a full day of shooting on most nights. Overall, it wasn’t too bad.

“Yo, bitch. I’m inviting Jared and Richard over to watch the first episode of Teletubbies. I TIVO’d it. Friday night okay?” Chris said on their way to set one morning.

“Hmm?” Jensen replied. He wasn’t quite awake yet, leaning his head against the cool windshield and cradling his giant travel mug of coffee in his hands.

“Friday night, you, me, Jared and Richard, plus our crappy couch and our tiny TV. You’re in charge of getting popcorn.”

Jensen yawned. “Sure.”

When Friday night approached Jensen started getting nervous. How the hell did Chris think it was a good idea to get all four of them into their tiny living room? Something was going to give.

“Relax, Jensen. You’re freaking out,” Chris said, twisting the cap off a beer from the fridge and handing it to Jensen.

“I’m not freaking out,” Jensen muttered.

“You cleaned the entire house, including scrubbing the toilet. Something’s not right,” Chris pointed out.

“So? It was dirty. It needed to be done, and I don’t see you dying to pick up a toilet brush. Now move out of my way, I’m making popcorn.”

Chris held his hands up and stepped out of the kitchen.

A while later saw all four of them clustered in the living room. Jensen had taken the chair, Chris and Richard sprawled on the sofa and Jared had decided to sit on a giant pillow on the floor with the bowl of popcorn on his lap.

“Shh, it’s starting!” Jared said, and threw popcorn at Chris when he kept talking.

“Hey! You’ll get popcorn between the cushions, and then Jensen won’t be happy. Do you know how hard he worked for this?”

“Shut up, Chris,” Jensen said.

“Yeah, geez Chris. Keep your trap shut for once,” Richard said, copying Jensen’s tone.

“Guys!” Jared said. “It’s really starting!”

And it was. Cheerful and hyper music started playing, and Teletubbies was splashed in bright colors across the screen, before the Tubbies appeared and started dancing around.

~~~

“This. Was. Awesome.” Jared’s voice was filled with glee. Richard was still laughing at the last scene, and Jensen stared dumbfounded at the television. The first episode was mostly footage of Alex, as he hadn’t been around for the shooting of these scenes.

Nevertheless, it was pretty amazing to see what they did in the studio transform into a fully formed television episode. Jensen had been a part of television productions before but it still amazed him, every time. He didn’t see Chris, Richard or Jared at all, only Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa, and Po. All the lighting rigs and the backdrops and everything that made it so obvious that what they were doing was taking place in a studio was gone, and instead the Tubbies might just as well have been outside frolicking in a green field under the blue sky. If the sun was the face of a laughing baby and the flowers were made of plastic, at least.

He almost surprised himself with an intense desire for Monday morning, where he could go back on set and keep filming. In a few weeks it was going to be his version of Dipsy on televisions all across the country.

Within minutes they were full of stories of what they’d gotten up to on set during those first weeks when Alex was still there.

“So how did he break his leg anyway?” Jensen asked, munching on the last pieces of popcorn.

“Oh no. You didn’t hear?” Richard’s eyebrows shot to the top of his forehead and he almost levitated out of his seat with excitement.

“No? Should I have?” Jensen said.

“I would have thought Chris had told you as soon as it happened, but I am very glad he didn’t. Thrilled! Ecstatic, even. Because that means I get to do it.”

“Here we go,” Chris said.

“It all started with Alex being invited to be on the Ellen show.”

“Wait, what? Why was Alex invited to Ellen? He wasn’t really famous, was he?” Jensen asked.

“Just wait,” Chris said, looking amused. Puzzled, Jensen looked back over to Richard, who was almost vibrating with glee, his glass of soda forgotten in his hand.

“As I was saying, Alex was on his way to see Ellen, the queen of the realm, when his noble steed got spooked by a possum, and threw him off right into a crate of oranges and mangoes. Sadly, Alex broke his leg in the fall.”

Jensen just stared.

“Oh! No! I’ve got a better one. Alex was competing at the world skate boarding championship, but alas, a brave attempt at the 900 with a mute grab went awry, and he ended with a broken leg.”

Jared snickered.

“How about this,” Chris said. “Alex was walking into a bar, and bumped into Chuck Norris’ foot.”

“A good one, my friend, but I fear not good enough.” Richard was having entirely too much fun with this. “Chuck Norris was about to go on stage, and Alex said ‘break a leg’. So he did.”

“You are insane. You are all completely insane,” Jensen said.

“Hey now,” Richard replied. “Don’t go using ableist language. We’re just having fun.” He winked at Jensen, before letting out a loud bark of laughter, slapping his thigh.”

This of course led to looking up more Chuck Norris jokes on Chris’ laptop, which led to youtubing of old Teletubbies videos, including several where the parts of the original series were edited to fit with various pop songs, which led Richard to declare that they were going to make their own Tubbie video to the newest Justin Bieber song. He pushed the small sofa table against the wall and started figuring out the choreography, arranging the four of them into various positions that Jensen was sure the creators of the Teletubbies had never imagined or intended. He wasn’t sure he’d ever laughed this hard in his life.

After, they were collapsed either on the couch, the comfy chair or the floor.

“You,” Jared said, pointing his finger at Richard, “are going to be the end of me.” His shirt was riding up and Jensen lost himself for just a moment, staring at the visible stretch of skin. “Man, my shoulder is killing me.” He groaned and rolled his shoulders back, and rotated his head from side to side.

“You should ask Jensen to give you a massage,” Chris said. “He’s really good.” He stood up and started collecting the bottles and took them to the kitchen.

Jensen tensed.

“Oh my god, would you? That would be amazing,” Jared said.

“Um,” Jensen said. He was going to kill Chris. He hadn’t told him about his crush on Jared, which meant that he was either completely oblivious, or knew exactly what was going on and was doing this to torture Jensen. Knowing Chris, it was probably the latter.

“See, I have this knot right here. I think it’s my bed, my mattress is old and should have been replaced years ago.” Jared twisted his arm around to try to poke at a point behind his shoulder blade and winced.

Chris wandered back into the living room to get the empty popcorn bowl. “Did you know Jensen went to school to become a physical therapist before he decided that his higher calling was acting?”

“Chris.”

“What! It’s true. We all had dreams one day, Jenny-boy.” Chris smirked and patted Jensen on the head. “Now go put your skills to work.”

“Where should I sit?” Jared looked at him hopefully. There was no way out of this without looking like a major asshole. Jensen decided that Chris would get what was coming to him one day, moved to the couch and told Jared to sit on the floor in front of him. Jared complied, fitting himself between Jensen’s knees so that the back of his head was right in front of Jensen’s face. “Is this good?”

“Um, yeah.” Jensen put his hands on Jared’s shoulders and started kneading.

“Would it be better if I took my shirt off?” Before waiting for a reply Jared did just that, and Jensen was presented with vast expanse of golden skin. He saw Jared’s muscles ripple as he shifted, and swallowed hard. Rather than replying he put his hands back on Jared’s shoulders and kept on going.

“I hope my hands aren’t too cold,” he said, hoping he sounded normal and not freaking out, like he actually was.

“Oh no, this is perfect actually.” Jared sighed deeply and Jensen could feel how his shoulders rose and fell, the warmth of his skin, saw how his hair rustled with the movement and curled lightly at the nape, the exact shape of his ears. Shaking his head, Jensen tried to focus just on the massage.

“Hey guys, I’m heading out. Catch ya Monday.” Richard had put his jacket on and was standing by the door, waving.

“See ya,” Jensen said. Jared grunted a reply. Jensen heard the snick of the door closing, and the noise of the tap running in the kitchen, Chris probably cleaning up.

Jared groaned as Jensen moved his hands lower, working around his shoulder blades.

“Is this okay?” Jensen asked, ignoring a shiver.

“You kidding me? This is fantastic,” Jared replied, his voice turning slightly husky. “You are seriously good at this. Did you learn in school?”

“Well,” Jensen said, putting pressure on the knots he found with his thumbs. “A little. I’m not a fully registered massage therapist or physiotherapist or anything like that, but I’ve studied some on my own. Plus, I’ve had friends and exes that let me practice.”

“Feel free to practice on my any time you want, oh god.” His words turned into a moan that went straight to Jensen’s groin. He tried very hard to suppress the effects being this close to Jared was having on him. Sure, they worked together, and were in very close proximity sometimes, but that was at work, and while shooting they wore giant green and purple costumes, so it was hardly the same. Now they were in Jensen’s living room, Jared was half naked, Jensen’s hands were all over him, and if only Chris wasn’t in the kitchen, a few feet away, they’d be alone. Jensen felt light headed and so very turned on. He needed to focus. Chris could walk in at any time.

Jensen tried to listen for Chris, but then realized that there were no sounds coming from the kitchen, and probably hadn’t been for a while. He turned his head around as much as he could without jostling Jared and peered into the kitchen. It was empty. Chris wasn’t in the living room either; he must have gone upstairs.

The bastard. Jensen was seriously going to kick his ass. Or kiss him. He hadn’t decided.

“I mean it,” Jared said.

“Hmm?” It took Jensen a moment to realize what Jared was referring to.

“Seriously. Any time you want to give me a massage, or, well, something else, just let me know. Okay?” Jared turned his head to look at him. Jensen’s hands had been on Jared’s neck, so now he was almost cradling his face. The expression on Jared’s face almost knocked the wind out of Jensen. His eyes were dark and his gaze was focused on Jensen, only inches away, and it took all of Jensen’s self-restraint not to tell him want to practice right now? My bedroom is just upstairs, or just close the gap and kiss him.

“How, um.” His mouth had gone dry and Jensen licked his lips before trying again, not missing how Jared’s gaze dropped to his mouth. “How’s Sandy?”

The change on Jared’s face was instant. “I can’t believe you,” he said, unfolded his long legs and stood up, grabbed his shirt from the floor and pulled it on, almost forcefully. “Say bye to Chris for me,” he said after quickly getting the rest of his stuff and heading for the door. He opened and turned around, opened his mouth like he was about to say something, wearing an expression Jensen had never seen before, before disappearing through the door and closing it behind him, leaving Jensen with no idea how to interpret what the hell just happened. So he did what he did best. He stood up, went to the bathroom, pissed and brushed his teeth, and went to bed.

This time, however, sleep took a long time coming.

~~~

Jensen’s strategy for the next day of shooting was to act completely normal. He made his coffee, caught a ride with Chris, and rested his forehead against the cool window, just like every other day on the way to work. Chris had given him a few strange looks, and asked him if anything had happened on Friday night, but nothing Jensen couldn’t handle. It was best if this was just forgotten as soon as possible. Jensen was going to jump around like and oversized caterpillar for the day, ignore Jared unless they were shooting when he was going to act like nothing had all had happened, and everything would be fine.

After all, nothing had happened. The more Jensen thought about it, the harder it was for him to understand Jared’s reaction. Maybe he and Sandy were having problems, which he didn’t like being reminded of. Maybe Jensen had been too rough with the massage, and hadn’t been paying enough attention to Jared’s signals that it had become painful. Maybe it had been completely inappropriate of him to give Jared a massage in the first place; he’d just been polite after
Chris had put it out there, and Jensen should have declined.

God, the massage. Wrong thing to think about. Jensen shifted and looked out the window, the LA landscape flying by.

The first few moments at work were awkward but Jensen made sure to bulldoze through it, chatting and smiling where appropriate. He wasn’t sure at first how Jared was taking it, but everything seemed to be fine. Jensen breathed a little easier.

~~~

Shooting was done for the day and Jensen was de-Dipsying in the costume room. He was buttoning up his shirt when Chris walked in. “So how long are you going to keep this shit up?”

Jensen paused and turned to face him. “What?”

“You know what I mean.” Chris’s arms were crossed on his chest, and he was looking at Jensen with one of those looks. The one that said “you’re not getting away with it this time,” whatever ‘it’ was. He didn’t use it very often. The last time had been when Jensen almost hadn’t called back to accept his first offer at a commercial, because he’d been too nervous.
Before that, when he’d scratched Tom’s car when he almost hit a lamp post, and had been planning on just getting it fixed and never telling him.

Jensen knew exactly what he was talking about. He should have known he wasn’t able to keep anything from Chris, as much as he’d hoped that just this once his fuckups wouldn’t be known to his best friend. “No really, what?”

Chris rolled his eyes. “Come on, don’t treat me like I’m stupid. I’m talking about this thing with Jared.”

Jensen gave up on pretending. It never worked with Chris anyway. He looked down and resumed buttoning up his shirt. “There is no thing with Jared.”

“Exactly my point.”

“Well, what do you want me to do?” Jensen raised his hands in surrender. “He has a fucking girlfriend. He’s probably in love with her. It’s not like he’s available, and if he was, he’s not interested in me. And even if he was, it would be a stupid idea to get involved with a coworker.”

“Oh my god, Jensen. You are the biggest idiot in the world. Jared isn’t in love with fucking Sandy.”

“What?” Jensen’s stomach did a weird flip contraction thing.

“Have you even seen her around lately? Sandy dumped him because he’s totally gone over you, you fucking idiot.”

Jensen froze.

“Are you even listening to me?”

Yes, Jensen was. He tipped his chin up. “Yeah, and so? Points two and three still stand.”

“Fucking hell, Jensen. You’re the most emotionally stunted person I have ever met.” Chris pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath that didn’t seem to do much to change his mood. “You know? I can’t deal with this. I’m out of here. Find your own fucking ride.” With that he stalked away, digging his car keys out of his pockets.

Jensen figured he should probably call after him - how else was he going to get home? - but Chris was gone before he could formulate the words.

Shit.

Jensen rubbed his forehead with the heel of his hand, and walked off trying to find someone heading to his part of the city. He saw a part of the lighting crew pack up. Sandy wasn’t one of them. He kept on walking anyway.

It was getting late and the studio was almost empty. Jensen was on the verge of giving up and trying to figure out if he could take the bus home, or possibly call a cab, although he’d rather not spend the money. He decided to do one more round of the studio. Maybe he’d run into Justin from sound; he lived in the same area as Jensen. He rounded a corner and collided with a broad chest.

“Shit, I’m so sorry,” he said at the same time as he heard “Jesus, watch where you’re going,” from a voice that did funny things to Jensen’s insides.

“Um. Hey,” Jared said. He’d grabbed onto Jensen’s forearm but quickly let go.

“Hey,” Jensen replied. They were almost chest to chest, and Jensen hastily stepped back and ran his hand through his hair. “Sorry, didn’t mean to run into you like that.”

Jared shrugged. “’S cool.” He took a step backwards as well.

“Uh. What are you still doing here?” Jensen cringed. He had the worst habit of putting his foot in his mouth around Jared. “I mean, it’s been a while since we wrapped.”

Jared just shrugged again. “Stayed behind to take a shower before driving home. I was all sticky.” It was only now that Jensen noticed that Jared’s hair was damp, a few droplets painting his neck and coloring the collar of his shirt, and this was such an incredibly inappropriate time for his dick to get interested.

“Right.”

What he really should do was ask Jared for a ride home. They weren’t neighbours but it wasn’t too far out of Jared’s way to drop Jensen off. No, what he really should do was drag Jared into the nearest closet and kiss him senseless. Shit, what he really needed to do was to get out of this incredibly awkward situation right away. Or maybe, just maybe, he should listen to Chris and actually, well, talk to Jared. Fuck, since when did ‘listen to Chris’ become the most rational course of action in any situation?

“What?” Jared frowned. Jensen realized that he’d huffed out loud.

“Aah, nothing. I mean. Shit. Listen,” Jensen said. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“I can’t believe I’m going to do this.”

“Do what?”

“Look. Can we talk?”

Jared looked at him skeptically. “Talk. Here?”

Jensen looked around. The studio was pretty deserted by now but they were still in a public area. “Come on,” he said and started walking. He needed to get this over with before he lost whatever bout of courage he suddenly seemed to possess. He weaved through lighting rigs and camera gear, only hoping that Jared would actually follow.

“Are you taking me to the Teletubbie house?” Jared said incredulously. The giant multicolored
structure was right in front of them. At least it was private.

“Yeah, I guess I am. That okay?”

“I guess.”

Jensen turned around and took a deep breath. The house looked so different with the lights turned off. They weren’t in total darkness, but long shadows obscured Jared’s upper half. He was standing by the Tubbie table with his arms crossed over his chest, his expression guarded.

For a second Jensen allowed himself to really take in just how incredibly attractive Jared was, and how much his crush wasn’t going away. At all. His plan of avoiding the problem until it went away wasn’t working, so maybe it was time for a new tactic, as much as he hated it.

“I like you,” Jensen blurted out. “So I’m sorry if it’s made things awkward between us. I tried to not let it affect anything but I may have, uh, not succeeded very well with uh, with that. So.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and hoped that he wasn’t screwing everything beyond recognition. “My momma always said that honesty is the best policy, so, decided I’d give that a try.” He shrugged.

Jared didn’t say anything. Jensen felt like his heart was trying to beat its way out of his chest, and his stomach was trying to eat itself. Another second passed and Jensen peeked up.

“Fuck, I just made everything worse, didn’t I? Look, just - just forget I said anything, okay? I’ll - I’ll just -“ Jensen ran his hand through his hair. He was such an idiot. Fucking Chris.

“You’re such an idiot.”

“What?” Had he said that out loud? He was losing his fucking mind. Then he noticed that Jared was smiling.

“I like you too, you fool.”

That didn’t make any sense. “But. What? What about Sandy?”

Jared rolled his eyes and stepped closer. “Will you shut up about Sandy? Yeah, she’s great, and yeah, we went on a few dates. But that hardly makes us married.”

“I’m, uh.” Jensen let out a nervous chuckle. “I’m having some trouble processing here.”

“Well, then. Why won’t I explain it to you.” Jared stepped closer, and was now only a couple of feet away from Jensen, close enough to touch. “You like me, and I like you. You were behaving like an ass, but now you’re going to stop it. I was being a wuss, but I’m going to stop that too. We’re both single and available. Sounds like the math is pretty simple, here.” He stepped even closer, and raised one hand up to touch Jensen’s cheek, which caused him to shudder all over, and immediately brought him back to Friday night, and touching Jared, and god, he wanted to again. So much.

Before he lost his nerve, Jensen put his hand on the back of Jared’s neck and pulled him down for a kiss. Jared responded immediately, opening up and tangling his tongue with Jensen’s. He brought his other hand up and cradled Jensen’s face and Jensen groaned, it felt so fucking good. He stepped closer until they were chest to chest, his free hand clutching at Jared’s side, the other running into his hair and gripping, trying to climb into Jared’s mouth, all thought flying from his mind; the only thing that mattered was getting him to keep making those little sounds.

Suddenly Jensen’s back bumped up against something, a loud noise blared around them and they were bathed in strobes of multicolored light. Jensen almost jumped out of his skin and released his grip on Jared, turning around to try to figure what the hell was going on. “ Jesus!” Was this the fire alarm? Security? Were they getting arrested for making out on set? What the hell were they thinking anyway?

Jared was - laughing? “Fuck, you-…” He walked over to the wall and pressed a giant yellow button, and the noise stopped. “You set off the Tubbie machine!”

Jensen blinked, and tried to process. “You mean. I. What.” Jared was right. The wall Jensen had walked into (or Jared had walked him into and fuck, that was hot) was the one filled with large circular buttons in bright colors that made sounds when they were pressed. Just last week Dipsy had played a song by pressing them. “Jesus.”

Jared cracked up again and rested his hand on Jensen’s shoulder, and he went hot all over. “How about we, um. Get out of here?” Jared’s voice was almost sultry in Jensen’s ear and he nodded his head so rapidly he almost dislocated something.

“Very, uh, good idea.” Jared was nosing at the skin behind Jensen’s ear and it was so deliciously wonderful he could hardly formulate a single thought.

“Somehow I doubt Misha would like us having sex on the Tubbie table.” Jared’s voice was downright mischievous and Jensen whimpered as Jared pressed soft kisses at corner of his mouth.
“Would probably mess up his chi, or something.”

“That’s it. We’re leaving. Right now.” Jensen grabbed Jared’s arm and dragged him behind him out of the house and in the direction of the exit to the parking lot.

Jared chuckled and followed him willingly. “Do you have your car here?”

“No,” Jensen replied. “I kind of need a ride.”

Jared got his keys out of his pocket and jingled them in the air. “My place or yours?”

“Yours. Mine has Chris.”

~~~

A few minutes later they were in Jared’s car on their way to Jared’s apartment, and Jensen started having doubts. Now that Jared wasn’t distracting him with his touch he was full of questions. Were they really doing this? What if it made things awkward on set? Should they establish some ground rules? And what about Sandy? Had they really broken up, and if so, when? Jensen probably shouldn’t ask that last part, Jared was liable to ditch him at the side of the road if he did.

“You’re not changing your mind on me, are you?”

They were stopped at a red light and Jared was looking at Jensen. “Hmm?”

“I - well. I just wanted to say that if you wanted me to take you to your place, then just say so. Alright?”

Jensen tried to stop his leg which was jiggling against the floor. This was his window - he could cancel now and no harm would be done. Except it would be. He’d already tasted Jared’s kisses, and given a promise of more to come. It would be impossible to go back to pretending there was nothing going on anymore. For better or worse, Jensen was in this now, and he was going for broke.

“Thanks but. I’m okay.”

Jared practically beamed at him.

“Do you want something to drink? Water? Beer? Orange juice?” Jared asked as he closed the door to his apartment and took off his jacket.

“Not really.” Jensen grabbed Jared’s waist and pulled him close for a kiss. Jared’s jacket dropped to the floor as both his hands landed on Jensen’s ass, hauling him closer. Jensen groaned, it felt so good. “Is there a bedroom in this place?” he said into Jared’s ear before trailing kisses down to his collarbone, pulling at his shirt to expose more skin.

“I’ll give you the grand tour,” Jared replied with a husky voice, pulled Jensen’s lower lip into his mouth, and then started walking them backwards. “This is the hallway that leads to the bedroom.” He took a hold of Jensen’s arm, turned around and started walking. “This is the door to the bedroom. And this is the bedroom.” He kicked the door shut behind them with one leg. “And this,“ he pointed to the bed, “is where I give blow jobs.”

Jensen whimpered and practically jumped onto the bed.

~~~

The next day, Danneel asked Jensen to come to her office. Jensen instantly tensed. Last night had been absolutely glorious, and he’d hardly been able to stop smiling the entire morning, even though he was short on sleep and Jared didn’t know how to make good coffee to save his life. Of course something bad was going to happen.

All the reasons Jensen had repeated to himself a thousand times for why it’s a bad idea to get involved with a coworker, especially if they ended up being inappropriate on the set for a children’s television show, Christ, ran through his head, and he’d almost convinced himself he was going to be fired, or charged with public indecency, when he knocked on Danneel’s door.

“Jensen, good to see you,” she said and waved him in.

“Yeah, uh, you too.” He took a seat in front of her desk and tried to stop his leg from bouncing.

“I just wanted to tell you again how happy we’ve been with your work here. You’ve been a wonderful Dipsy.”

The compliments were nice, but she was speaking in the past tense. Oh well, it had been a nice ride while it lasted.

“Alex has been in touch with us, and his leg is healing nicely. He should be able to start working again real soon.”

Jensen should get in touch with his agent, see if some auditions were coming up. At least he had a working car now, so wouldn’t have to rely on Chris or expensive taxis.

“We’re not contractually obligated to offer him his position back. And anyway, Alex has informed us that he is interested in pursuing other projects.”

Jensen blinked.

“To tell you the truth, we were very happy to hear that, as we actually prefer you over Alex as our Dipsy. You’ve worked here just as long as he had, by now, and you fit better with the direction we want to take the show.” She tapped a manicured fingernail against some files on the desk. “I know your position has been a bit up in the air, what with not knowing the situation with Alex, so I just wanted to let you know that the position of Dipsy is now permanently yours, if you want it.”

Jensen thought about his resume, his career goals, demographics, and itchy costumes.

Danneel smiled. “You don’t have to reply right away, of course. We’ll talk to your agent about revising your contract. I just wanted to let you know.”

Jensen thought about being Dipsy the green giant, working with Chris, pelting Richard with foam pancakes, and Jared’s smile.

“Thanks. I’ll take a look at the contract and get back you.” But he was pretty sure what he was going to say.

Being a Teletubbie rocked.

THE END