The Innocent Little Stalker
Google is eerie sometimes. A search begins with parrots and micro-chipping, and somehow ends with stalking behavior. It's as if the internet is saying, "You need to see this." Or maybe it's my subconscious. Anyway, I came across this excerpt from a little known book by a group of psychologist.
...other features that may alert the examiner to the illegitimate victim, irrespective of the underlying diagnosis, include: disorganized or convoluted histories that cannot be verified of are falsified by the available evidence; the engagement of multiple therapists, moving from one to another at the first hint of skepticism; and the possession of dossiers of 'evidence', the latter often proving to be of dubious significance.
- Paul E. Mullen, Michele Pathé, Rosemary Purcell, Stalkers and Their Victims (Cambridge University Press)
Once I found that, I had to dig a little more, and this website had something to say that reassured me my own experience was far from unusual. In fact, ICP is actually quite predictable.
One aspect a stalking victim quickly notices is that the stalker often makes references to perceived wrongdoing by the victim, or straight out tells the victim in a number of different ways that the victim is the one who is at fault. Furthering on from this, the stalker will also often take on the role of the victim. Repeatedly telling the victim all the things they are doing bad to the stalker. They will even send "mercy" type messages to the victim… whereby the stalker literally behaves like an innocent little victim, who is now asking for your mercy, so that you stop doing whatever they think you are doing to them. [...]
...these "I'm The Victim" emails are sent with the express purpose that they will be released to other people in one way or another. It is a purposefully thought out and designed method to try to taint the evidence so to speak. [...] So that once they are released to others, they have already tainted the bowl of evidence with their own victimization storyline.[...] they are clearly demonstrating to the group involved that they are trying to get through to you (their victim), trying to make you see reason, why won't you leave them alone… and on and on and on. [...]
This is when a stalker is going through states of realization of what they have done, what they are doing, what they have become. They are going through moments of clearly seeing their own depravity, and evil sick deeds. And they don't want to admit to themselves what they are. It would cause a massive conflict in their minds to self admit what it is they really are. Which is evil. To overcome this, so that they can live with themselves, they must justify themselves. Not only to themselves so that they believe it, but to their victims as well. And in doing so, this is when the victim will receive these sporadic emails of the stalker's imaginary storyline alterations, whereby the story changes so that you become the perpetrator, and they become the helpless victim. They cannot deny the evidence of what they have done, so justification is the only option. In other words, the story now becomes that the stalker was somehow wronged by the victim and only did what they had to do to stop the imaginary perpetrator from doing whatever imaginary thing they were doing to the stalker.
It's textbook. It's exactly the behavior of ICP. The last paragraph is also insightful, for it implies certain things the victim says sparks the need of the stalker to justify themselves. Thus, a criticism of ethics might cause another outburst, thus illustrating that which the stalker him/herself, perhaps subconsciously, knows they're guilty of.
In my head this goes under the "nutcase in need of therapy" tag.
...other features that may alert the examiner to the illegitimate victim, irrespective of the underlying diagnosis, include: disorganized or convoluted histories that cannot be verified of are falsified by the available evidence; the engagement of multiple therapists, moving from one to another at the first hint of skepticism; and the possession of dossiers of 'evidence', the latter often proving to be of dubious significance.
- Paul E. Mullen, Michele Pathé, Rosemary Purcell, Stalkers and Their Victims (Cambridge University Press)
Once I found that, I had to dig a little more, and this website had something to say that reassured me my own experience was far from unusual. In fact, ICP is actually quite predictable.
One aspect a stalking victim quickly notices is that the stalker often makes references to perceived wrongdoing by the victim, or straight out tells the victim in a number of different ways that the victim is the one who is at fault. Furthering on from this, the stalker will also often take on the role of the victim. Repeatedly telling the victim all the things they are doing bad to the stalker. They will even send "mercy" type messages to the victim… whereby the stalker literally behaves like an innocent little victim, who is now asking for your mercy, so that you stop doing whatever they think you are doing to them. [...]
...these "I'm The Victim" emails are sent with the express purpose that they will be released to other people in one way or another. It is a purposefully thought out and designed method to try to taint the evidence so to speak. [...] So that once they are released to others, they have already tainted the bowl of evidence with their own victimization storyline.[...] they are clearly demonstrating to the group involved that they are trying to get through to you (their victim), trying to make you see reason, why won't you leave them alone… and on and on and on. [...]
This is when a stalker is going through states of realization of what they have done, what they are doing, what they have become. They are going through moments of clearly seeing their own depravity, and evil sick deeds. And they don't want to admit to themselves what they are. It would cause a massive conflict in their minds to self admit what it is they really are. Which is evil. To overcome this, so that they can live with themselves, they must justify themselves. Not only to themselves so that they believe it, but to their victims as well. And in doing so, this is when the victim will receive these sporadic emails of the stalker's imaginary storyline alterations, whereby the story changes so that you become the perpetrator, and they become the helpless victim. They cannot deny the evidence of what they have done, so justification is the only option. In other words, the story now becomes that the stalker was somehow wronged by the victim and only did what they had to do to stop the imaginary perpetrator from doing whatever imaginary thing they were doing to the stalker.
It's textbook. It's exactly the behavior of ICP. The last paragraph is also insightful, for it implies certain things the victim says sparks the need of the stalker to justify themselves. Thus, a criticism of ethics might cause another outburst, thus illustrating that which the stalker him/herself, perhaps subconsciously, knows they're guilty of.
In my head this goes under the "nutcase in need of therapy" tag.