a lot of things..

[kay_shorty]

ok well i have a lot of things to talk about.. first off i have a huge prayer request ... a friend of mine and ricky's mother died a few days ago... and i just really need everyone to pray for her family.. she is only a senior and she is really upset about it.. umm.. there are soo many things.. i dont know where to start.. ive been thinking a lot lately about what i want to do with my life.. i dont kow.. i want to travel.. and i also want to go to college... but u know.. if i go to college then i wont have any money to travel and if i travel first then it might take me awhile to get back into school... i dont know.. ricky is leaving for germany in june and he kinda wants me to go with him.. im thinking about it .. but i dont want to lose the opportunity to go to college u know.. its just grrr soo weird.. this past week has been really great.. i mean i helped at the church counseling .. watching the kids.. i loved it.. even with it meaning that EVERY day of my fall break getting up at 5:30am gettting ready .. and going to the church at 6:30am .. till somedays 3 and others 6... u know.. it was worth it.. some ppl thought taht iwas just crazy.. cause they wanted to sleep in and get some rest but u know.. i loved waking up every morning this past week thinking.. there is kids that are expecting me to be there.. i know i walked in one day a little late.. like an hour late and there was like already 4-5 kids waiting for me to get there.. i really grew attached to some of them.. like, sheridan (she is an older girl), morgan.. hunter, cameron, churs, bradlen, jalyen, lauren, PAIGE, man... i love those kids.. i really want to come back and see them.. u know but the thing is that.. well by the time i get home.. i dont have a way there and i wouldnt have a way back home.. cause if tiffany leaves around 3:30-4:00pm.. and i dont get home till 3:30 .. i mean.. i dont know.. i could ride the bus to the church like amber did.. and then just have someone pick me up.. but i dont know.. it just depends.. im really thinking about .. if i do stay here in owensboro then this summer while im out of school i could come in and help out again.. i loved it.. i wouldnt of done anything differently.. i really wouldnt.. im soo glad that i did go and stick with it.. i was going to do it just one day.. but i couldnt i had to stay all week.. i looked forward to seeing the kids.. i love kids what can i say.. but some of the time.. they did get on my nerves.. but they are kids.. lol oh well.. today was great... ms. V .. well Svea.. one of the counselers .... picked me up and we went to the reids apple fest today and went shopping and then back to her apartment to eat some german chocolate cake.. lol we spent the whole day together.. man i loved it.. i was telling her that i just wished that she and tiffany was like my age... cause its like.. man im starting to hang out older ppl.. my mom asked me why i did that.. and i siad i dont knwo.. i mean i love tiffany and V with all my heart.. they are good ppl.. i knwo that i can always count on them to be there for me.. and i hope they feel the same about me.. u know.. i try to be there for them and talk to them.. i just some things i cant talk about to ppl my age.. they dont understand and with tiffany and V they always have an answer.. ok well not all the time.. but u know they give me advice which is always good advice.. and they care about me.. they make me feel good about myself.. im growing up.. im not the same girl anymore.. ive changed.. i see a lot of things differently than what i did a few months ago.. and its weird.. u know.. i dont feel guilty about one thing in particular anymore.. and i mean im just going to let life run its course... im going to let GOd be in control of my life.. im really tired.. so im going to go now.. ill update more whenever i can.. lots of luv God bless
ps.. u only get one mother.. please treat her right.. u dont get another one.. remember to tell her u love her everyday..
KEra