Hey I managed to write two of the drabbles that I was dared to write from
this post. They're both from Chrno Crusade with possible spoilers involved so if you plan on reading it then, I'm sorry. As much as it pains me to say this, I'd avoid reading my drabbles -TTWTT-
I haven't forgotten about the drabble I still owe you,
ladynathena, so don't worry~ ->W<-
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Read more... )
...Unless you just mean human, in which case I'm overanalyzing this. XD
And the Chrono/Aion one...T_T That was so sad! I like the idea of Aion and Chrono acknowledging their relationship a final time before Aion dies. And the contrast between Aion and Chrono, too--Aion going out with a smile while Chrono watches with tears in his eyes, for example. Aion's at peace with his choice, and Chrono still has nothing but questions. (But, ha, that's probably me putting my own feelings about the characters and story onto the piece.)
My main critique with that one is that it's a little hard to tell who's being talked about. For example: He slowly closed the remaining gap between them as his left hand took a hold of his right. Aion's left hand, right? Is he holding his own hand, or Chrono's? (I know logically it's Chrono, but it's not clear from this sentence.) Don't be afraid to use their names a little more often to make it clearer!
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Yeaaaaaaaaaaa I'm sooo sorry I could only think of sad ones -TTWTT-;;;; I'll have to think of a happy one for them then but that scene was the only thing I could think of at the moment~ -TTWTT-;;; And yep~ that's what I was going for~<333 I wasn't sure if Chrno was too emotional there but yeaaa~ ->W<-;;;
Yea, I came to realize that quite a bit doing this piece. Like I said, I always like to challenge myself and try managing it so it's a bit more mysterious not even sure if that's what I was aiming for~ ->W<-;;;; but errrr... I'll try and use their name instead more especially if I'm not using a vague scene and I want ppl guessing it~ ->W<-;;; I'll add the names before posting it on DA~<3333
Thank you so much for reading them~! Much appreciated~<3333
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It's okay! Sad is great when written well! I'm an angst whore, and Aion/Chrono...I mean...They have happy moments, but their relationship (whether romantic, platonic or brotherly) is going to end up tragically. And I don't think Chrono was too emotional...he's really one of the most emotional characters in the series (besides Rosette, and maybe Azmaria), and finding out someone you used to respect and care for is really your brother, but you have to kill him anyway...I wouldn't be surprised if Chrono mourned him. Even knowing all the horrible things he did and being unable to forgive him for it, I still don't think he'd be able to feel something other than sadness at Aion's death. (Actually, I've sort of toyed with the idea of canon-updating Chrono to after that point to play with that, but I'm not sure if I'm finished with developing pre-carnival Chrono or not.)
Yeah. XD;; Experimenting is good! And some mystery can sometimes be good, too. But I think readers like clarity...if that makes sense. I keep saying stuff I learned in Creative Writing class. XD;
You're welcome! Thank you for writing them!
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*phew* I'm glad to hear that~ -TTWTT- and Yea, I've been giving it a thought too. Not sure from where I'd want to take him but it's been crossing my mind too lately. We need a good curse to reveal ittttttttttt~<3333333333
Yea definitely, I added their names in certain spots so it's not too "Chrno did this. and Aion did that." but I think enough to help the reader know who's who? And I actually purposefully separated the paragraphs so that the first part is Aion and the second part is Chrno~ sooo hopefully with those patterns and the added names it's a little more clearer than before~<333 If you're interested in what changes I made here you go~<33 LOL That's awesome!
Not at all~<333333333333333333
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"It" being their relationship? I've been thinking that. XD Particularly now that we've only got the twins and Mary...it'd be an interesting plot twist to pull. Actually, it might be fun to see how pre-Carnageival Chrono deals with learning about Aion being his brother. Hmmmm...
That works much better. <33 Not too redundant, but the clarity is really kicked up a notch. Nicely done!
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Yuuuuuuuuuuusssss~~<33333 And I know, right? -TTxTT- I agree~ LOLOL awwww poor Chrno~ -TTWTT- *pet pet*
Phew~ yaaaay I'm so glad it does~<333 Thank you thank you~ ->W<- <333333
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We'll have to see if we can set up something with that, maybe~ Sometime after Aion/Ahiru stuff, maybe. xDDDD
<3 You're welcome!
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LOLOL Definitely~<3333
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