Falling into old patterns?
I am currently with my family in my parents home. The home that I grew up in, the home that my personality was formed, the home that stays the same and changes ever so slightly.
I see how much I've changed since moving out 17+ years ago, but I'm also seeing how much my parents have changed. When you only see them from time to time, new patterns form and old patterns become enhanced.
I am watching my parents become older, as I do too. I see the patterns they laid out for me and I'm seeing how I became who I am.
Every night, before my mother goes to bed, she putzes around the house and cleans up papers and puts things in piles. Trying to clear off the table for the next day. Sometimes, these things can't be cleared away. It bothers her, I can tell.
Every morning, my father wakes up with the crack of dawn goes into the bathroom which is right by my room, and shakes his medicine into his hand. "Click." "Click." "Click." "Click." Then proceeds to the dining room for more medicine. "Click." "Click." "Click." Ugh. I gotta get out of here. Granted, I truly appreciate the love and understanding they have bestowed upon me and mine, but I am also a grown person with grown tendencies and ticks of my own.
Hopefully, this will be very short lived. I didn't want to be here as long as I have been, but nothing has come up for us for housing. Again, very grateful here. I feel the love. But I need my space.
I see how much I've changed since moving out 17+ years ago, but I'm also seeing how much my parents have changed. When you only see them from time to time, new patterns form and old patterns become enhanced.
I am watching my parents become older, as I do too. I see the patterns they laid out for me and I'm seeing how I became who I am.
Every night, before my mother goes to bed, she putzes around the house and cleans up papers and puts things in piles. Trying to clear off the table for the next day. Sometimes, these things can't be cleared away. It bothers her, I can tell.
Every morning, my father wakes up with the crack of dawn goes into the bathroom which is right by my room, and shakes his medicine into his hand. "Click." "Click." "Click." "Click." Then proceeds to the dining room for more medicine. "Click." "Click." "Click." Ugh. I gotta get out of here. Granted, I truly appreciate the love and understanding they have bestowed upon me and mine, but I am also a grown person with grown tendencies and ticks of my own.
Hopefully, this will be very short lived. I didn't want to be here as long as I have been, but nothing has come up for us for housing. Again, very grateful here. I feel the love. But I need my space.