fuck life and here's a poem/ song i wrote
a wasted life i pay the price for all you've done to me
absorbing only what is there, and never what i see
i wish that i could follow you, a shadow in your dust
but that is what i used to do now as i drown i rust
i walk amoung the wasted, the hidden, the unnamed
the ones who do the damage are seldom ever blamed
i stare into the sunset that clouds refuse to hide
my trampled heart i fed to you, but yours i've been denied
we've wandered every pathway this cage will yet allow, the candle that burned long ago is imaginary now
no energy to fight this, as time pushes us along
we're standing here imprisoned but we've done nothing wrong
......................................
::sigh:: i wish someone knew what this is like. when you stop caring, and nothing makes you happy. i'd smile if it didn't hurt so much to fake it. fuck this world. damn it to hell, it's already on it's way. people keep thinking i'm numb, or ok. i need some fucking pills. antidepressants or sedatives or something. i still miss Tim. i don't think i can live without him, but i doubt he wants anything to do with me. i wanna start a revolution. but everyone's a coke-head these days and no one really gives a shit anymore. i want to save the animals. liberate the people from the chains they build around themselves... god damnit though, i'm too worthless of a person to help anyone.
i've been trying to smoke away my singing voice with ciggaretes. it's useless to me. i only wanted to express things that no one wants to hear. how i'm drowning in despair and how much i wish Tim would realize that i love him and come back. no one hears me sing exept Andy and Tim, but Tim's not here and Andy's sick of never hearing a song about him.
i'm gonna end up old, tired, sick and alone in a mental institution. then i'll die. so why the fuck prolong the suffering?
absorbing only what is there, and never what i see
i wish that i could follow you, a shadow in your dust
but that is what i used to do now as i drown i rust
i walk amoung the wasted, the hidden, the unnamed
the ones who do the damage are seldom ever blamed
i stare into the sunset that clouds refuse to hide
my trampled heart i fed to you, but yours i've been denied
we've wandered every pathway this cage will yet allow, the candle that burned long ago is imaginary now
no energy to fight this, as time pushes us along
we're standing here imprisoned but we've done nothing wrong
......................................
::sigh:: i wish someone knew what this is like. when you stop caring, and nothing makes you happy. i'd smile if it didn't hurt so much to fake it. fuck this world. damn it to hell, it's already on it's way. people keep thinking i'm numb, or ok. i need some fucking pills. antidepressants or sedatives or something. i still miss Tim. i don't think i can live without him, but i doubt he wants anything to do with me. i wanna start a revolution. but everyone's a coke-head these days and no one really gives a shit anymore. i want to save the animals. liberate the people from the chains they build around themselves... god damnit though, i'm too worthless of a person to help anyone.
i've been trying to smoke away my singing voice with ciggaretes. it's useless to me. i only wanted to express things that no one wants to hear. how i'm drowning in despair and how much i wish Tim would realize that i love him and come back. no one hears me sing exept Andy and Tim, but Tim's not here and Andy's sick of never hearing a song about him.
i'm gonna end up old, tired, sick and alone in a mental institution. then i'll die. so why the fuck prolong the suffering?