..and it hurts a whole lot, but its missed when its gone..
he's still alive and he's hoping to make it until friday when his sons go and visit him. it is doubtful that he will.
i keep praying that he will make peace with God. i really hope he does. i would like to get to see him up in heaven.
my mom got to talk to him earlier. he said that he loved us and he has all these years, he just wasnt very good at schowing it. he apologized for a lot of things. he said that he was so glad that my parents adopted me and that i was a wonderful grand-daughter. and he sent his love.
im scared. i dont know who to talk to. ive tried to be strong all day and have done pretty well. i almost lost it in english but i caught myself. then i called my mom during advisory and talked to her and she told me all that stuff above and i completely lost it. luckily no one saw. sometimes i like to be invisible.
i am on the verge of tears writing this but i must conceal them. there are 2 girls nears me and 4 teachers in the next room. no good for tears.
i want to go home. there has been to much death. im tired of pretending im tough and that things dont phase me when im not and they do.
just 2 more periods. then taking 2 girls home. then i can go home and let it all out. or go to church and look for my phone and hopefully neil will be around and i can cry with him.
i feel all alone. i dont know what to say to my dad. i wish i could think of something but i cant. im basically ignoring him and i know thats wrong, but i really dont know what to do.
found out that another one of my boys is leaving for the army. tomorrow. to "key west and then hopefully iraq." [quote from him]. prayers to be sent along with daniel.
time to go. i have goosebumps and my nose burns. the bathroom is my friend.
i keep praying that he will make peace with God. i really hope he does. i would like to get to see him up in heaven.
my mom got to talk to him earlier. he said that he loved us and he has all these years, he just wasnt very good at schowing it. he apologized for a lot of things. he said that he was so glad that my parents adopted me and that i was a wonderful grand-daughter. and he sent his love.
im scared. i dont know who to talk to. ive tried to be strong all day and have done pretty well. i almost lost it in english but i caught myself. then i called my mom during advisory and talked to her and she told me all that stuff above and i completely lost it. luckily no one saw. sometimes i like to be invisible.
i am on the verge of tears writing this but i must conceal them. there are 2 girls nears me and 4 teachers in the next room. no good for tears.
i want to go home. there has been to much death. im tired of pretending im tough and that things dont phase me when im not and they do.
just 2 more periods. then taking 2 girls home. then i can go home and let it all out. or go to church and look for my phone and hopefully neil will be around and i can cry with him.
i feel all alone. i dont know what to say to my dad. i wish i could think of something but i cant. im basically ignoring him and i know thats wrong, but i really dont know what to do.
found out that another one of my boys is leaving for the army. tomorrow. to "key west and then hopefully iraq." [quote from him]. prayers to be sent along with daniel.
time to go. i have goosebumps and my nose burns. the bathroom is my friend.