Fun with Hous & Pocus
I have a new favourite comic, Hokus & Pokus, about a hedgehog bimbo who's in love with a snarky cat. It's in Swedish, but I've decided to post some of their conversations here just for the lovely WTF-factor they have.
Pocus (typing): Hi hi blog, I investigated some sites today and noticed a bunch of DIRT on the internet. In some nude pics the men were almost NAKED. Naked men on the internet is immoral and bad, so I will write to the internetboss and tell him, 'naughty naughty internetboss, remove all naked men immediatenow!' *pause* But first I'll investigate some more sites.
***
Pocus: Do you ever think about the future, Hocus?
Hocus: No.
Pocus: Yes you do. Like when all cars fly and can honk music, or when bath tubs shine in the dark, and phones roll backwards.
*pause*
Hocus: WHY would phones roll backwards?!
Pocus: Look! You're thinking about the future!
***
Pocus: Congratulations on midsummer!
Hocus: What do you mean, "congratulations"?
Pocus: Congratulations to Jesus! When Jesus was crucified on the midsummer pole, he remembered his tame herring and shouted, "Herring! I love you, Herring!" It sounded so funny that everyone started giggling and dancing around Jesus on the pole. Then midsummer was created.
Hocus: That's ENTIRELY WRONG!
Pocus: Yeah. That's no way to behave. Poor Jesus.
***
Pocus: The Bible says God gave his pal Moosy ten magical amendmends. "Don't duvet your neighbor's donkey and don't bear false witness against everything and everyone you APE..." Just imagine how Moosy must have felt, all harrassed and put on the spot. LIKE, BULLIED BY GOD!
Hocus: The commandments were for EVERYONE!
Pocus: DO YOU WANT A BEATING OR SOMETHING!?
***
Pocus: I'm gonna start a diet. Defunetily. I have decided to live healthy and trim my body. Maybe start running? REALLY running maybe, but it's important to start easy... Better start with walks first, though slowly, or maybe just eat something that's good for me. Cake makes me happy, that would be a good start.
***
Pocus: Heeeey, what if you were a pilot. A pilot who was AFRAID OF HEIGHTS. A pilot who was afraid of heights and had no ARMS or LEGS. What if you were a pilot who was afraid of heights and had no arms or legs, and you had to fly with your undies full of BATS who needed to poo. What if you were all of those things and SURVIVED, but then slipped on a banana peel and died.
***
Pocus: Did you know that the planet is in danger? BIG danger maybe. Cabbydoxies come out in the air and makes the Greenland ice melt.
Hocus: Carbon dioxide?
Pocus: Cabbydoxies are created when we breathe too...
Hocus: CARBON DIOXIIIDE!
Pocus: You cabbydox even more when you're all shouting and silly like now.
***
Pocus: Love is a mystical force that can hit at ANY TIME. For example, you're in love with me, Hocus.
Hocus: Are you insane beyond all repairs?
Pocus: Denial is the first step towards love.
Hocus: Do you have a death wish?
Pocus: Death threats are the second step towards love!
Hocus: YOU'RE JUST MAKING STUFF UP!!!
Pocus: Screaming and yelling is the third step towards love!!
***
Pocus: To think, the number of stars out there! Think about it, sooooo many. REALLY many, maybe. Think about what if the stars had eyes and watched us, and tails that waved rather slowly. Think about what if the stars could fart a pink powder that changed the entire universe, but still not.
Hocus: Think about what if I bashed your head in.
Pocus: That's no way of thinking...
***
Pocus: I'm a little tussock so green and pretty, watch me dance on the hill, wooo!
Hocus: So you finally went all the way into insanity?
Pocus: No, it's called THEATER and that means you play a PART.
Hocus: You play your part like a mental patient.
Pocus: Your silly-criticism has no effect on me. But I hate you anyway.
***
Pocus: This is a case for my friend: the superhero UltraHog! *jumps out of panel and back in, wearing superhero outfit* ULTRAAAA!
Hocus: Get expensive and effective help, POCUS!
Pocus: It's not me! It's ULTRAHOG!
Hocus: I SAW you change clothes!
Pocus: Illusions is one of my super powers...
***
Pocus: Do you want to cuddle? Cuddlywoo.
Hocus: No.
Pocus: Yes? Make out, then? Slurp?
Hocus: If I don't want to cuddle, I REALLY don't want to make out.
Pocus: Want to sex a bit, then? Sexysex?
Hocus: NO!
Pocus: Right! Do you have a "headache" or something?
Hocus: 24 hours a day...
***
Pocus: Many muscle men on the beach... I bet they eat anabolic asteroids.
Hocus: Anabolic steroids.
Pocus: I have heard that anabolic asteroids are dangerous and bad.
Hocus: Anabolic STEROIDS.
Pocus: Anabolic asteroids are even illeeeegal.
Hocus: ANABOLIC STEROIDS!
Pocus (blogging): ...Then the cops took Hocus away.
***
Pocus: Did you know that a pony mommy can eat pink edible paint and have pink pony children?
Hocus: Pfft. No way.
Pocus: YOU'RE WRONG!
Hocus: I'm not even gonna HAVE this discussion.
Pocus: THEN I'M NOT GONNA HAVE IT EITHER!!
Please not that if this seems a lot, there are 145 comics on the site and I've downloaded 32 of those...
****
On a completely different note, I find Adrian Pasdar's sister Ana really pretty. She was in one ep of Mysterious Ways, playing his sister there too.
Pocus (typing): Hi hi blog, I investigated some sites today and noticed a bunch of DIRT on the internet. In some nude pics the men were almost NAKED. Naked men on the internet is immoral and bad, so I will write to the internetboss and tell him, 'naughty naughty internetboss, remove all naked men immediatenow!' *pause* But first I'll investigate some more sites.
***
Pocus: Do you ever think about the future, Hocus?
Hocus: No.
Pocus: Yes you do. Like when all cars fly and can honk music, or when bath tubs shine in the dark, and phones roll backwards.
*pause*
Hocus: WHY would phones roll backwards?!
Pocus: Look! You're thinking about the future!
***
Pocus: Congratulations on midsummer!
Hocus: What do you mean, "congratulations"?
Pocus: Congratulations to Jesus! When Jesus was crucified on the midsummer pole, he remembered his tame herring and shouted, "Herring! I love you, Herring!" It sounded so funny that everyone started giggling and dancing around Jesus on the pole. Then midsummer was created.
Hocus: That's ENTIRELY WRONG!
Pocus: Yeah. That's no way to behave. Poor Jesus.
***
Pocus: The Bible says God gave his pal Moosy ten magical amendmends. "Don't duvet your neighbor's donkey and don't bear false witness against everything and everyone you APE..." Just imagine how Moosy must have felt, all harrassed and put on the spot. LIKE, BULLIED BY GOD!
Hocus: The commandments were for EVERYONE!
Pocus: DO YOU WANT A BEATING OR SOMETHING!?
***
Pocus: I'm gonna start a diet. Defunetily. I have decided to live healthy and trim my body. Maybe start running? REALLY running maybe, but it's important to start easy... Better start with walks first, though slowly, or maybe just eat something that's good for me. Cake makes me happy, that would be a good start.
***
Pocus: Heeeey, what if you were a pilot. A pilot who was AFRAID OF HEIGHTS. A pilot who was afraid of heights and had no ARMS or LEGS. What if you were a pilot who was afraid of heights and had no arms or legs, and you had to fly with your undies full of BATS who needed to poo. What if you were all of those things and SURVIVED, but then slipped on a banana peel and died.
***
Pocus: Did you know that the planet is in danger? BIG danger maybe. Cabbydoxies come out in the air and makes the Greenland ice melt.
Hocus: Carbon dioxide?
Pocus: Cabbydoxies are created when we breathe too...
Hocus: CARBON DIOXIIIDE!
Pocus: You cabbydox even more when you're all shouting and silly like now.
***
Pocus: Love is a mystical force that can hit at ANY TIME. For example, you're in love with me, Hocus.
Hocus: Are you insane beyond all repairs?
Pocus: Denial is the first step towards love.
Hocus: Do you have a death wish?
Pocus: Death threats are the second step towards love!
Hocus: YOU'RE JUST MAKING STUFF UP!!!
Pocus: Screaming and yelling is the third step towards love!!
***
Pocus: To think, the number of stars out there! Think about it, sooooo many. REALLY many, maybe. Think about what if the stars had eyes and watched us, and tails that waved rather slowly. Think about what if the stars could fart a pink powder that changed the entire universe, but still not.
Hocus: Think about what if I bashed your head in.
Pocus: That's no way of thinking...
***
Pocus: I'm a little tussock so green and pretty, watch me dance on the hill, wooo!
Hocus: So you finally went all the way into insanity?
Pocus: No, it's called THEATER and that means you play a PART.
Hocus: You play your part like a mental patient.
Pocus: Your silly-criticism has no effect on me. But I hate you anyway.
***
Pocus: This is a case for my friend: the superhero UltraHog! *jumps out of panel and back in, wearing superhero outfit* ULTRAAAA!
Hocus: Get expensive and effective help, POCUS!
Pocus: It's not me! It's ULTRAHOG!
Hocus: I SAW you change clothes!
Pocus: Illusions is one of my super powers...
***
Pocus: Do you want to cuddle? Cuddlywoo.
Hocus: No.
Pocus: Yes? Make out, then? Slurp?
Hocus: If I don't want to cuddle, I REALLY don't want to make out.
Pocus: Want to sex a bit, then? Sexysex?
Hocus: NO!
Pocus: Right! Do you have a "headache" or something?
Hocus: 24 hours a day...
***
Pocus: Many muscle men on the beach... I bet they eat anabolic asteroids.
Hocus: Anabolic steroids.
Pocus: I have heard that anabolic asteroids are dangerous and bad.
Hocus: Anabolic STEROIDS.
Pocus: Anabolic asteroids are even illeeeegal.
Hocus: ANABOLIC STEROIDS!
Pocus (blogging): ...Then the cops took Hocus away.
***
Pocus: Did you know that a pony mommy can eat pink edible paint and have pink pony children?
Hocus: Pfft. No way.
Pocus: YOU'RE WRONG!
Hocus: I'm not even gonna HAVE this discussion.
Pocus: THEN I'M NOT GONNA HAVE IT EITHER!!
Please not that if this seems a lot, there are 145 comics on the site and I've downloaded 32 of those...
****
On a completely different note, I find Adrian Pasdar's sister Ana really pretty. She was in one ep of Mysterious Ways, playing his sister there too.