Vote for a reformed citizen!
So I have a plan.
Some of you may already be aware that some months ago, in an act of desperate self-preservation, I declared to the world that I wasn't going to give a rip about the upcoming Presidential election until September 1st. Which was a great plan, back in July. However, September is fast approaching, and I'm starting to get the feeling that I'm going to be horribly depressed come the first. So, in another act of self-preservation, I'm starting a new campaign, for a new write-in candidate whom I think we can all get behind.
How would you like to vote for someone who stands up for what he believes in?
How would you like to vote for someone who doesn't take crap from anybody?
How would you like to vote for someone who has a demonstrated ability for leadership, and has worked his way up the ladder from the bottom to the very top of a complicated, yet organized, syndicate?
How would you like to vote for someone who, demonstratively and definitively, hasn't broken a single law of this great nation in over sixty years?
How would you like to vote for someone who, in all probability, may well have voted for JFK? And who tends to hang around a great number of other people who also, probably, voted for JFK?
How would you like to vote for someone who's known to have, in an earlier life, screwed over the IRS?
If any of the above are true, I'd like to ask you to consider joining this campaign. For more information,
Thank you for seeking more information! Please make sure you are fully informed about all available candidates before you vote this year. Thanks so much, and remember- vote early, vote often!
*Please note: pretty much the entirety of this post, especially the bit about voting for a dead mafia boss, is intended as satire. It amazes me why we choose to vote for certain people, So I figured, if dead Chicagoans have voted, why haven't they been voted for? It didn't seem fair. Thanks for playing!
Some of you may already be aware that some months ago, in an act of desperate self-preservation, I declared to the world that I wasn't going to give a rip about the upcoming Presidential election until September 1st. Which was a great plan, back in July. However, September is fast approaching, and I'm starting to get the feeling that I'm going to be horribly depressed come the first. So, in another act of self-preservation, I'm starting a new campaign, for a new write-in candidate whom I think we can all get behind.
How would you like to vote for someone who stands up for what he believes in?
How would you like to vote for someone who doesn't take crap from anybody?
How would you like to vote for someone who has a demonstrated ability for leadership, and has worked his way up the ladder from the bottom to the very top of a complicated, yet organized, syndicate?
How would you like to vote for someone who, demonstratively and definitively, hasn't broken a single law of this great nation in over sixty years?
How would you like to vote for someone who, in all probability, may well have voted for JFK? And who tends to hang around a great number of other people who also, probably, voted for JFK?
How would you like to vote for someone who's known to have, in an earlier life, screwed over the IRS?
If any of the above are true, I'd like to ask you to consider joining this campaign. For more information,
Thank you for seeking more information! Please make sure you are fully informed about all available candidates before you vote this year. Thanks so much, and remember- vote early, vote often!
*Please note: pretty much the entirety of this post, especially the bit about voting for a dead mafia boss, is intended as satire. It amazes me why we choose to vote for certain people, So I figured, if dead Chicagoans have voted, why haven't they been voted for? It didn't seem fair. Thanks for playing!