A Bit of a Breakdown...and Musings on Writing Sonnets Every Day
I had a bit of a breakdown yesterday. In part caused by semi-job offer I got (without a salary or guarantee that it was actually an offer), being stressed out because I have been mourning (in advance) being done with school (theoretically forever), in part because some things I really want aren't working out.
I'm sort of a planner--though I think I actually prefer when other people plan for me. (I will go to your party. I will even help you throw your party. And if you ask me to throw you a party, I can do that too. But I never decide to throw a party.) So I don't know what I'll be doing in 2 weeks, and I don't have anything to look forward to after that point. And I like knowing what I'll be doing. So that means I need to plan. To set things up to look forward to.
So last night me and my husband decided that we are going to Arches National Park on the 23rd, after graduation. It's only a 4.5 hour drive, and we'll get to spend all Saturday there. (Plus, it's free national park week.) So yes, something to look forward to.
raisinfish did a great post today on risk and wisdom, security and confidence. I think I need to find my balance of what risks I want to take. Today is my last day of teaching, perhaps in a while. That scares me--I need to have new things to do, to be, new places to set my sights. As much as I love the game Fluxx, I don't like it when my life is in flux. But I need to accept some flux, and take risks.
There's a professor here who spent several years writing a sonnet every single day. He's written 1000s of sonnets, and he can now sit down and write an excellent sonnet in 15 minutes. All he did was know the sonnet form and then write a sonnet everyday. (Now he's posting a sonnet online every day--very cool stuff.)
Right now I'm working on prioritizing. My goals--the things I really want, need to be the things I do. And that will give me meaning. I'm not going to choose to write a sonnet every day, but I'm sure the things I choose will be meaningful to me.
I'm sort of a planner--though I think I actually prefer when other people plan for me. (I will go to your party. I will even help you throw your party. And if you ask me to throw you a party, I can do that too. But I never decide to throw a party.) So I don't know what I'll be doing in 2 weeks, and I don't have anything to look forward to after that point. And I like knowing what I'll be doing. So that means I need to plan. To set things up to look forward to.
So last night me and my husband decided that we are going to Arches National Park on the 23rd, after graduation. It's only a 4.5 hour drive, and we'll get to spend all Saturday there. (Plus, it's free national park week.) So yes, something to look forward to.
raisinfish did a great post today on risk and wisdom, security and confidence. I think I need to find my balance of what risks I want to take. Today is my last day of teaching, perhaps in a while. That scares me--I need to have new things to do, to be, new places to set my sights. As much as I love the game Fluxx, I don't like it when my life is in flux. But I need to accept some flux, and take risks.
There's a professor here who spent several years writing a sonnet every single day. He's written 1000s of sonnets, and he can now sit down and write an excellent sonnet in 15 minutes. All he did was know the sonnet form and then write a sonnet everyday. (Now he's posting a sonnet online every day--very cool stuff.)
Right now I'm working on prioritizing. My goals--the things I really want, need to be the things I do. And that will give me meaning. I'm not going to choose to write a sonnet every day, but I'm sure the things I choose will be meaningful to me.