Death
I don't mourn like others. I rarely cry, and very rarely at the time it happens. On a an even rarer occasion, I'll cry at a funeral.
I'm often thought cold and heartless because of it. I spoke to several yesterday that were sobbing over Brian's passing. I couldn't cry, because I truly believe all is not lost. He's just on the other side, like we all will be eventually. It's like having a baby or falling deeply in love. You don't get it until it happens to you. It's the final milestone, nothing more.
Yes, I will eventually cry. When I go looking for him the first day of Scarby, and when he's not there, I'll cry. They will be the tears of a child who can't have what she wants when she wants it. It's like when I pick up the phone to call my grandmother and I realize she's long passed. Like the times I get a whiff of clove cigarettes and turn to pounce on Cecily and she's not there. Even when I see a tube of Dr. Pepper lip smackers and think of my friend Michelle who passed in 1983 and realize how much she has missed. I will cry then.
I read this at Tyna's funeral. It's how I feel about it. There is a thin veil between there and here and he's not far. No father than when I was busily doing laundry in The Colony at my house and he was working in Plano. I just can't razz him when I want to anymore. That will be sad.
Death is nothing at all
I have only slipped away into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other
That we are still
Call me by my old familiar name
Speak to me in the easy way you always used
Put no difference into your tone
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed
At the little jokes we always enjoyed together
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was
Let it be spoken without effort
Without the ghost of a shadow in it
Life means all that it ever meant
It is the same as it ever was
There is absolute unbroken continuity
What is death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind
Because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you for an interval
Somewhere very near
Just around the corner
All is well.
Nothing is past; nothing is lost
One brief moment and all will be as it was before
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!-
-Canon Henry Scott-Holland, 1847-1918, Canon of St Paul's Cathedral
I'm often thought cold and heartless because of it. I spoke to several yesterday that were sobbing over Brian's passing. I couldn't cry, because I truly believe all is not lost. He's just on the other side, like we all will be eventually. It's like having a baby or falling deeply in love. You don't get it until it happens to you. It's the final milestone, nothing more.
Yes, I will eventually cry. When I go looking for him the first day of Scarby, and when he's not there, I'll cry. They will be the tears of a child who can't have what she wants when she wants it. It's like when I pick up the phone to call my grandmother and I realize she's long passed. Like the times I get a whiff of clove cigarettes and turn to pounce on Cecily and she's not there. Even when I see a tube of Dr. Pepper lip smackers and think of my friend Michelle who passed in 1983 and realize how much she has missed. I will cry then.
I read this at Tyna's funeral. It's how I feel about it. There is a thin veil between there and here and he's not far. No father than when I was busily doing laundry in The Colony at my house and he was working in Plano. I just can't razz him when I want to anymore. That will be sad.
Death is nothing at all
I have only slipped away into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other
That we are still
Call me by my old familiar name
Speak to me in the easy way you always used
Put no difference into your tone
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed
At the little jokes we always enjoyed together
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was
Let it be spoken without effort
Without the ghost of a shadow in it
Life means all that it ever meant
It is the same as it ever was
There is absolute unbroken continuity
What is death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind
Because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you for an interval
Somewhere very near
Just around the corner
All is well.
Nothing is past; nothing is lost
One brief moment and all will be as it was before
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!-
-Canon Henry Scott-Holland, 1847-1918, Canon of St Paul's Cathedral