(no subject)
the city dressed in gray this morning. i woke in an inexplicably black humor, making the billows of gray skirt seem oppressive. i used it to plunge deeper into my dark reverie, savoring my slough of despond, allowing myself to be pulled into my dark musings. i wondered if my mood was because of the weather, or if the weather just gave me permission to be in my mood. so i stared blankly out of the train window, and blamed the thunderheads for all of my (and the rest of the world’s) problems.
then she caught me from a new angle. she pulled me out of my sulk and asked me to dance. i had not realized how lovely she looks in gray. this soft, pearly gray. it suits her. just like me. she looks lovely in the sun. merry and whimsical. but always a little like she is pretending. putting a yellow scarf over a gray dress. just like me. when people tell me i am a happy person, i smile to myself and think “you do not know me yet.” not that i am unhappy. just gray. like the city’s morning dress. the light is not lessened, just heavier and more costly.
so my soul stretched and rolled over, deciding to be comfortable in this gray. and my restless mind was content.
then she caught me from a new angle. she pulled me out of my sulk and asked me to dance. i had not realized how lovely she looks in gray. this soft, pearly gray. it suits her. just like me. she looks lovely in the sun. merry and whimsical. but always a little like she is pretending. putting a yellow scarf over a gray dress. just like me. when people tell me i am a happy person, i smile to myself and think “you do not know me yet.” not that i am unhappy. just gray. like the city’s morning dress. the light is not lessened, just heavier and more costly.
so my soul stretched and rolled over, deciding to be comfortable in this gray. and my restless mind was content.