rambbling....
so i just finished this book i've been reading, it is one in a series of mystery-style things set in Alaska. Good books, make you think. The one i just finished leaves the main charater with virtually nothing. She has lost the few people that were the closest to her and in some of the most horrible circumstances. It just reminds me how incredibly unfair life is sometimes. I mean, i like to consider myself a relatively strong person, i like to think i've been through enough strife to make me somewhat humble and appreciative...but i don't think i've ever really pushed trough adversity in the face. I can't imagine what it takes to handle that type of stuff. Hell at my worst i was pretty bad for me. It just makes me wonder why people don't take the things they love and grab on with both hands and never let go. I don't think i'm the best to speak on it as i'm guilty myself, but honestly we are scared of so many things. You never know when those things that you do have and those people that are a part of your life will be plucked from it without you being able to do anything to stop it. nothing is ever perfect...i think i've learned that much. I was watching tv the other day and there was an artist who paints children on. He was speaking about his subjects and why he likes them. He is attracted to the innocence. The lack of worry in their lives regardless of what is happening around them. I was thinking about it and i kind of envy that in a way. I worry and wonder so much about things and it seems like such wasted time, time that i could be acting on what i want. But i don't work that way. I don't want to hurt anyone, or inconvenience them. And even though it prooves to be lonely that way and i may dislike it, i don't think i'd change it if i could...ah well..i'm wierd...this is me rambling...i'll stop now