Current thoughts...
I have come to a place in my life where I am... content.
I am neither happy nor unhappy to the point of needing to change something.
There are things that I wish I had that would make me happier, but most (if not all) are beyond my ability to get for myself. Some of them require more money than I possess, and some of them rely heavily on other people.
I have my bad days. They come and go, and rarely do I have a mood that lasts for more than a couple days. Mind you, this leads to drastic mood swings that aren't any more fun for me than they are for the people around me.
Dragging people along with me on my emotional rollercoaster isn't exactly ideal to me. I am eternally grateful to the people who deal with me on a daily basis, who have seen me through my most recent deep slumps, and who are still willing to not only talk to me, but to still be my friend. I am truly blessed to have you in my life. Thank you, so much.
On a sort of related note...
Even though I would like more than what I am getting, I understand the reasons you said no. That doesn't mean that I agree with them. That doesn't mean that I will accept them. Stop thinking with your head in matters of the heart. You don't consult your heart in a logic puzzle, so why would you consult your head in love? 10% of you is keeping the rest of you from being happier than you are. Please just follow your heart and make yourself happy.
Maybe in time, you will realize what I am saying. You will realize that people who have different view can make things work, are perhaps better suited to do so than people who share the same views on everything. I have seen people who have more in common than we do, who get married, and get divorced within 6 months. I've also seen people who have less in common than we do who have been together for 6 years, and couldn't be happier. Their children will be well adjusted, and will have more exposure to varying view points. Two people who are very similar in world view are likely to have children who grow up to be narrow minded, with the same biases as their parents, rather than being able to form their own opinions.
Anyway. That's all I really wanted to say, I guess.
For now.
I am neither happy nor unhappy to the point of needing to change something.
There are things that I wish I had that would make me happier, but most (if not all) are beyond my ability to get for myself. Some of them require more money than I possess, and some of them rely heavily on other people.
I have my bad days. They come and go, and rarely do I have a mood that lasts for more than a couple days. Mind you, this leads to drastic mood swings that aren't any more fun for me than they are for the people around me.
Dragging people along with me on my emotional rollercoaster isn't exactly ideal to me. I am eternally grateful to the people who deal with me on a daily basis, who have seen me through my most recent deep slumps, and who are still willing to not only talk to me, but to still be my friend. I am truly blessed to have you in my life. Thank you, so much.
On a sort of related note...
Even though I would like more than what I am getting, I understand the reasons you said no. That doesn't mean that I agree with them. That doesn't mean that I will accept them. Stop thinking with your head in matters of the heart. You don't consult your heart in a logic puzzle, so why would you consult your head in love? 10% of you is keeping the rest of you from being happier than you are. Please just follow your heart and make yourself happy.
Maybe in time, you will realize what I am saying. You will realize that people who have different view can make things work, are perhaps better suited to do so than people who share the same views on everything. I have seen people who have more in common than we do, who get married, and get divorced within 6 months. I've also seen people who have less in common than we do who have been together for 6 years, and couldn't be happier. Their children will be well adjusted, and will have more exposure to varying view points. Two people who are very similar in world view are likely to have children who grow up to be narrow minded, with the same biases as their parents, rather than being able to form their own opinions.
Anyway. That's all I really wanted to say, I guess.
For now.