Children and startups have an awful lot in common, pt 1
I'm not really sure how the most interesting book I read in 2012 and one of the few related books I read in 2013 never got LJ reviews, considering how many people I've recommended them to. Apparently the only books I really enjoyed from my 2012 reading were Tierney and Baumeister's Willpower and Dan John's Never Let Go, which is doubly interesting because despite being a bro's guide to getting strong for your sport, the latter has a lot of philosophy that boils down to willpower management. Which makes sense because Dan John was a religion major. I highly recommend Never Let Go if you're post-Crossfit or post-Starting Strength and it's a nice easy read. I should get some more of his books.
But seriously, how did I never write up either hearing Tierney and Baumeister speak in person and then reading their book?? It's completely changed how I view things over the past two years. Short version: willpower is a muscle you can build and exhaust. People who "have a lot of willpower" usually have either trained it (by regular practice of mildly difficult skills like good posture) or conserve it (by reducing the amount of decision making in their lives). It's very related to cope, you can temporarily top it off by having enough blood glucose, and somehow completely indulging will top it for a while. Every chapter highlights a different celebrity and how they represent willpower, from Eric Clapton and addiction, Amanda Palmer and practice to Oprah and food, David Livingstone and discipline. The chapter on children and willpower is totally on my reading list for how to raise good children.
So is David Brooks' response to the tiger mom book. Summary: smart kids need social skills so not allowing play dates so they can practice the piano more is counterproductive. Before some trip, Lbro suggested his The Social Animal, which I read, added to the parenting reading list, and recommended. Because it was over a year ago though, I can't remember why. There's a lot in it about childhood development, bonding, willpower, and a lot of broad ideas from pop psych, told in story format. I didn't think it was the greatest book I'd ever read, but I remember it having value and now I can't remember why, which kinda makes me want to go on a Kindle buying rampage and buy every book I've ever taken a note from. Either that, or write more (timely) LJ entries.
Paul Tough's How Children Succeed was the next most related book I read. Oddly enough, Petite Fromage recommended it as an alternative to Lean In, which it's only barely related to. Tough adds grit to Tierney & Baumeister's willpower. Like The Social Animal - or Outliers or the Rich Dad, Poor Dad series for that matter - it highlights the differences between how upper middle class parents raise and teach their children vs. how poor people do. Modeling good willpower strategies is part of it, but some of it is also putting in the work, every day, and rising up again when you have a setback. It's mostly from the perspective of school systems, but there's a lot for individual parents to think about. I had the opportunity to discuss it with a smart-as-she-is-beautiful statistician who evaluated educational programs at the time, who took issue with the book, partly bc she argues that a lot of those schools that are failing are doing so bc of phys plant issues like no air conditioning in Florida (fair) and partly bc she said it has no application to my family. Considering I bemoan my own personal lack of grit almost as often as I worry about Lucky's, I emphatically disagree with the latter.
And now I've run out of space to write about the books I read this year that continue this theme, so you'll have to wait until next week for the thrilling continuation. Brevity is a skill I still haven't learned.
But seriously, how did I never write up either hearing Tierney and Baumeister speak in person and then reading their book?? It's completely changed how I view things over the past two years. Short version: willpower is a muscle you can build and exhaust. People who "have a lot of willpower" usually have either trained it (by regular practice of mildly difficult skills like good posture) or conserve it (by reducing the amount of decision making in their lives). It's very related to cope, you can temporarily top it off by having enough blood glucose, and somehow completely indulging will top it for a while. Every chapter highlights a different celebrity and how they represent willpower, from Eric Clapton and addiction, Amanda Palmer and practice to Oprah and food, David Livingstone and discipline. The chapter on children and willpower is totally on my reading list for how to raise good children.
So is David Brooks' response to the tiger mom book. Summary: smart kids need social skills so not allowing play dates so they can practice the piano more is counterproductive. Before some trip, Lbro suggested his The Social Animal, which I read, added to the parenting reading list, and recommended. Because it was over a year ago though, I can't remember why. There's a lot in it about childhood development, bonding, willpower, and a lot of broad ideas from pop psych, told in story format. I didn't think it was the greatest book I'd ever read, but I remember it having value and now I can't remember why, which kinda makes me want to go on a Kindle buying rampage and buy every book I've ever taken a note from. Either that, or write more (timely) LJ entries.
Paul Tough's How Children Succeed was the next most related book I read. Oddly enough, Petite Fromage recommended it as an alternative to Lean In, which it's only barely related to. Tough adds grit to Tierney & Baumeister's willpower. Like The Social Animal - or Outliers or the Rich Dad, Poor Dad series for that matter - it highlights the differences between how upper middle class parents raise and teach their children vs. how poor people do. Modeling good willpower strategies is part of it, but some of it is also putting in the work, every day, and rising up again when you have a setback. It's mostly from the perspective of school systems, but there's a lot for individual parents to think about. I had the opportunity to discuss it with a smart-as-she-is-beautiful statistician who evaluated educational programs at the time, who took issue with the book, partly bc she argues that a lot of those schools that are failing are doing so bc of phys plant issues like no air conditioning in Florida (fair) and partly bc she said it has no application to my family. Considering I bemoan my own personal lack of grit almost as often as I worry about Lucky's, I emphatically disagree with the latter.
And now I've run out of space to write about the books I read this year that continue this theme, so you'll have to wait until next week for the thrilling continuation. Brevity is a skill I still haven't learned.