and again...
I hate the way I feel lately. I hate what I said to Matt the other night too. I thought it would help me but it didn't. I told him I wanted to be alone this weekend, I encouraged him to go to Cali and to NJ, and I told him that we would figure out the living situation. Not true. I didn't want to be alone this weekend, I want to go to Cali and NJ WITH him and I want to continue this living situation as boyfriend and girlfriend, as it should be.
I still don't know where we stand because he hasn't officially said that we are or are not together, so I don't know.
I'm so confused, lonely...
I just want Matty back. The Matty I love and had 8.5 AMAZING years with. The one that was there for me thought EVERYTHING
I dont want to start over with anyone else, there is no one else. I don't want him with anyone else. There isn't anyone else.
I want to go to the banquet, go to Lake George, go camping, go to OBX, spends my days and nights with him....
I can't help but blame myself. What did I do wrong? Why can't I be loved in return?
Why is it that everything I love leaves me unexpectedly?
I still don't know where we stand because he hasn't officially said that we are or are not together, so I don't know.
I'm so confused, lonely...
I just want Matty back. The Matty I love and had 8.5 AMAZING years with. The one that was there for me thought EVERYTHING
I dont want to start over with anyone else, there is no one else. I don't want him with anyone else. There isn't anyone else.
I want to go to the banquet, go to Lake George, go camping, go to OBX, spends my days and nights with him....
I can't help but blame myself. What did I do wrong? Why can't I be loved in return?
Why is it that everything I love leaves me unexpectedly?