Hello, good friend the everglow is in motion
Right, so this week has just begun but it has already turned to be cuhrazy... but i kinda like it that way in a twisted sense
Yesterday had to be one of the worst days of my life. I woke up that morning to take my Humanities test which I was totally prepared for, however I guess my brain wasn't aware of that cause I had a major anxiety attack in the middle of the effing test. My stomach started getting sick and I started getting the shakes and my body wanted to jump out of its skin. I had to sit still for like a minute while I closed my eyes and just breathed until I calmed myself down. I hate when shit like that happens... it makes me feel like such a freak of nature. But I did eventually calm down and was able to finish my test
But then next period came and we were talking about death and dying and how southern appalachian religions approach the subject. We were all talkin about goin to the white throne of judgment and all this bull crap and I was like "I don't wanna go to any throne and be judged... I don't wanna die" And then came the second most severe freakout of the morning. I came face to face with the realization that I-am-going-to-die. I am going to die. I can't help it. I looked around the room and realized that there will be a time when I won't see these people again, when I won't see the trees and the grass and the sky. There will be a time when Katie Martin no longer exists. Ladies and gentlemen, I hyperventilated. My brain was telling me to throw up and run out and attach myself to the grass cause it could be the last time i saw it. I was an effing mess. I had to just put that little happy thought away and become once again katie who is only concerned with the here and now and does not think such things. I think I am much happier this way.
I'm also really worried about Emily, but don't tell her that. She's not getting better and it scares the hell out of me. How can someone so healthy and happy be so sick? I just don't understand. BLAH!!!
Anyway, so my day was pretty damn shitty... until I saw
This is Danny at the TRS show last Friday!!! It's on the website under philly3... check the kid out!!!!
And my life was just made so much better!!!
Yesterday had to be one of the worst days of my life. I woke up that morning to take my Humanities test which I was totally prepared for, however I guess my brain wasn't aware of that cause I had a major anxiety attack in the middle of the effing test. My stomach started getting sick and I started getting the shakes and my body wanted to jump out of its skin. I had to sit still for like a minute while I closed my eyes and just breathed until I calmed myself down. I hate when shit like that happens... it makes me feel like such a freak of nature. But I did eventually calm down and was able to finish my test
But then next period came and we were talking about death and dying and how southern appalachian religions approach the subject. We were all talkin about goin to the white throne of judgment and all this bull crap and I was like "I don't wanna go to any throne and be judged... I don't wanna die" And then came the second most severe freakout of the morning. I came face to face with the realization that I-am-going-to-die. I am going to die. I can't help it. I looked around the room and realized that there will be a time when I won't see these people again, when I won't see the trees and the grass and the sky. There will be a time when Katie Martin no longer exists. Ladies and gentlemen, I hyperventilated. My brain was telling me to throw up and run out and attach myself to the grass cause it could be the last time i saw it. I was an effing mess. I had to just put that little happy thought away and become once again katie who is only concerned with the here and now and does not think such things. I think I am much happier this way.
I'm also really worried about Emily, but don't tell her that. She's not getting better and it scares the hell out of me. How can someone so healthy and happy be so sick? I just don't understand. BLAH!!!
Anyway, so my day was pretty damn shitty... until I saw
This is Danny at the TRS show last Friday!!! It's on the website under philly3... check the kid out!!!!
And my life was just made so much better!!!