Not happy with myself: katerrific3

katerrific3

Not happy with myself

Nov 02, 2005 14:14

Well i am having such a shity day! I did fail that chem test...i have never actually failed ne thing like that b4. But then again alot of people did. I also feel like i am worthless...due to many things. Last night i stayed home and talked to tons of people online...and so much un-needed drama occured. Its stupid. I need a job. I might be going up to ravenna this weekend for a birthday party on saturday...but i kinda dont wanna go unless mike goes. They invited him too, but i havent talked to him about it yet. I am not sure when he gets off today, hes suppost to be off early. Hopefully ill get to go over there lata tonight after brittany and i are done shopping at 12 oaks!!! THAT SHOULD BE THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY! I love you brittany! Ne way, so i had such a bad day...bad events like almost getting hit on the side by a truck, the guy stopped and appoligized cuz it was his fault and offered me $20...idk what for cuz he didnt PHYSICALLY hit my car...but he was an inch away. Then i feel inferior in my chem class...like i should be back in high school... this guy brad in my class and sandro in my class and i all failed our tests and said we dont know if we should keep going or drop out...but i am not as bad as they are...i have gotton A's and B's on EVERYTHING else!

I am also not happy with myself. I lost alot of weight the last month, and now i am just eating crappy again bc of the stress level i have. AHHHH! I am not happy with my appearence. PLUS i have random bursts of emotions like i am PMSing, when i am not PMSing...its nuts! PLus cramps too. Then when i DO have my periods they are soooo off from when they should be...i mean like by weeks! Cant i just be normal? What is normal? FUCK IT! I am constantly sad, and feel the need to keep busy with mike or friends. Family drives me insane right now, but at the same time i know i need to talk to them about certain things.

I dont think i can afford doing pre-recs and everything at u of m dearborn, with everything going on right now in my life. I am thinking of schoolcraft for nursing...bc they do have a good program, but once again i dont want my family to think i am this wishy washy....i know what i want, i just need to go where i can afford it! Plus u of m dearborn is overrated. I have one professor thats sooo retarted, he reads notes outta the book, and if u ask a question..its 50/50 if he'll know it. Then my other professor is weird, but a good teacher, but i never want to get up and go that early cuz its easier then the math class i took in high school...i didnt go like a week b4 a test and got a 97% on it. Its stupid. Plus i am only taking 2 classes this semester, and i wanna take 4 in the winter...but i am paying TWICE as much as some of my friends at scraft who are taking 4!!! I cant believe that. PLUS I NEED A LAPTOP BY XMAS...it would help...i can never focus where my computer is now, and i need to be able to take it on campus. Ne way
ill stop complaining...

im sorry to anyone who read this far...

well heres a few pics to cheer me up...and to show what the upcoming pic post will have on it... I love mike...he deff helps in times like these ♥