busy, stressed, messy, devastated, thankful, dirty, broke, perfect?, drunk dialing
so much is going on in my life, i haven't had time to update. to tell the truth i am just completely burnt out. i'm emotionally exhausted because of everything that has been happening. here's a brief update...
omg school. don't get me wrong, i love it but it's wearing me out. it's like all my graphic design classes take up my entire life. i really don't even get to party near enough as i should, not as much as the average college student. it's like, if i don't have to study for a test or sit through one of my four 3hr. long graphic design classes per week, then i'm living it up in hovland computer lab working on my assignments. i really do love doing it, i know this is the major for me....but i really didn't expect it to be quite this intense. i think it's just all hitting me now because it's spring term. i know the end is almost here...i'm just waiting patiently. until then, you can find me in hovland hell. =(
damn, my apartment. i can't even begin to describe what my room is looking like. it's completely trashed because 1. i am never home and 2. i don't have time to clean it because when i actually am at home for the whole ten minutes i get a break, cleaning is the last thing on my mind. i seriously have to take like jump from my door to my bed and then hop into my chair at my desk so that i won't break anything on the floor. man, if i could have one wish, i would have a personal assistant to clean up after me. that would be like a dream come true.
oh those unfortunate things in life. the death of a good friend of mine on april 7th and his funeral on the 11th, was really hard. i don't really want to go into detail because i feel it's a private thing that really is still too sensitive of a subject. all i want to say is that i am so emotionally exhausted from trying to deal with all of this. i miss you sam, and i love you. i always will. like lis said, "beyond the door there's peace I'm sure...and i know there'll be no more tears in heaven. i still have my memories and pictures in their frames, but in times like this, when a warm touch is too far out of grasp, nothing seems quite enough. sam, you will forever be missed. and i won't forget.
thank god for new found friends. brookey is a great friend of mine. i've gotten to know her so much better over the past week or so. when things were so hard, she helped to distract me by taking my mind off of them and focusing on girl talk, having fun, just craziness. she's my partner in crime. and god knows she's BOY CRAZY. ;) haha. i really see this friendship only getting better with time.
my child needs a bath. haha, i really feel horrible because my baby jetta Charley is such a pigsty! just like i mentioned about my room, i practically live in hovland so that really means i live out of my precious car. the reason i chose the title "my child needs a bath" is because rosie said in a post that she felt like an awful mother who hadn't given her baby a bath because her car was so dirty. i'm just letting you know that i know just what you mean, rose! maybe you'll find me cleaning my car, inside and out, tomorrow. then again, maybe not.
oh the money issue. no joke, i have 66 cents in my checking account right now. i'm so broke. i really need a job but i don't have time for one. i could get money from my parents but they are generously paying for my trip to rome this summer, so i feel bad asking. until i either get a job or some moola, top ramen and yummy water with lemon is the menu. hey, it's a good diet, i guess. (minus the top ramen lol).
the kevster. this is one area where things are really starting to look up. he's been takin such good care of me through sam's death and everything. i really feel like i can talk to him about anything and he understands. sometimes i just cry and he doesn't even say anything at all, he just listens and lets me vent. our relationship is just really going great. no fights, no getting sick of each other, we see each other every day. it's going great. but that's what scares me, it's getting to the point where it's like too good to be true. hmmm, just a gut instinct that somethings around the bend just waiting for the perfect time. i guess we'll see. until then, i'm just enjoying my time with my baby.
just one call away, huh? well, i just got the call that kevin needs to be picked up from a party. that's my job tonight so ima go now. hopefully this gave you all a little glimpse into my life as of lately.
omg school. don't get me wrong, i love it but it's wearing me out. it's like all my graphic design classes take up my entire life. i really don't even get to party near enough as i should, not as much as the average college student. it's like, if i don't have to study for a test or sit through one of my four 3hr. long graphic design classes per week, then i'm living it up in hovland computer lab working on my assignments. i really do love doing it, i know this is the major for me....but i really didn't expect it to be quite this intense. i think it's just all hitting me now because it's spring term. i know the end is almost here...i'm just waiting patiently. until then, you can find me in hovland hell. =(
damn, my apartment. i can't even begin to describe what my room is looking like. it's completely trashed because 1. i am never home and 2. i don't have time to clean it because when i actually am at home for the whole ten minutes i get a break, cleaning is the last thing on my mind. i seriously have to take like jump from my door to my bed and then hop into my chair at my desk so that i won't break anything on the floor. man, if i could have one wish, i would have a personal assistant to clean up after me. that would be like a dream come true.
oh those unfortunate things in life. the death of a good friend of mine on april 7th and his funeral on the 11th, was really hard. i don't really want to go into detail because i feel it's a private thing that really is still too sensitive of a subject. all i want to say is that i am so emotionally exhausted from trying to deal with all of this. i miss you sam, and i love you. i always will. like lis said, "beyond the door there's peace I'm sure...and i know there'll be no more tears in heaven. i still have my memories and pictures in their frames, but in times like this, when a warm touch is too far out of grasp, nothing seems quite enough. sam, you will forever be missed. and i won't forget.
thank god for new found friends. brookey is a great friend of mine. i've gotten to know her so much better over the past week or so. when things were so hard, she helped to distract me by taking my mind off of them and focusing on girl talk, having fun, just craziness. she's my partner in crime. and god knows she's BOY CRAZY. ;) haha. i really see this friendship only getting better with time.
my child needs a bath. haha, i really feel horrible because my baby jetta Charley is such a pigsty! just like i mentioned about my room, i practically live in hovland so that really means i live out of my precious car. the reason i chose the title "my child needs a bath" is because rosie said in a post that she felt like an awful mother who hadn't given her baby a bath because her car was so dirty. i'm just letting you know that i know just what you mean, rose! maybe you'll find me cleaning my car, inside and out, tomorrow. then again, maybe not.
oh the money issue. no joke, i have 66 cents in my checking account right now. i'm so broke. i really need a job but i don't have time for one. i could get money from my parents but they are generously paying for my trip to rome this summer, so i feel bad asking. until i either get a job or some moola, top ramen and yummy water with lemon is the menu. hey, it's a good diet, i guess. (minus the top ramen lol).
the kevster. this is one area where things are really starting to look up. he's been takin such good care of me through sam's death and everything. i really feel like i can talk to him about anything and he understands. sometimes i just cry and he doesn't even say anything at all, he just listens and lets me vent. our relationship is just really going great. no fights, no getting sick of each other, we see each other every day. it's going great. but that's what scares me, it's getting to the point where it's like too good to be true. hmmm, just a gut instinct that somethings around the bend just waiting for the perfect time. i guess we'll see. until then, i'm just enjoying my time with my baby.
just one call away, huh? well, i just got the call that kevin needs to be picked up from a party. that's my job tonight so ima go now. hopefully this gave you all a little glimpse into my life as of lately.