(no subject)

[katerinac]

i was once told that with one storm all my dreams would come true. well maybe that is true but maybe it isnt at the same time. ive watched people with their little storm clouds hoovering over their heads and i wonder if their dreams are going to come true. and then i look up and my little cloud is still there raining over my head. and it hasnt stopped yet. so my dreams wont come true, at least not yet. when the one person im in love with figures me out, then my dreams will come true. but he hasnt yet, he still doesnt understand. there will be a day though when he will, but maybe it will be too late. who knows. my head is just running in circles right now. its full of sad thoughts and of crazy ones. and i wish that it was all just one kind of thought so i wasnt so confused about everything. and i wish that i could be with my friends right now, the ones that really care about me. not the ones who are just pretending. and then i was reminded of how i wanted to take my boyfriend into victoria's secret. and now back to what i was talking about. thoughts they suck. anyways. this year has probably been the most interesting one of my life. ive found my true friends. and ive fallen in love with the same person over and over. and ive changed. some say in a good way others in a bad. im not really sure. but i know ive changed. ive done some things that i would have never even thought of doing last year. and said somethings too. and then people have made me realize what life is all about. and others have taught me to have a little more fun and take some more risks. wow. i really want to be with one person right now. and i bet you can guess who that person is. because its the one person that ive been thinking about all day. and i know that they arent too happy with me because i lied to them. and im sorry for doing so. its almost 8 and its still light outside. thats so confusing. it feels like its 6. geeze. and i havent done any of my homework. ive just been sitting here thinking about everything that has happened in the past couple weeks. and im happy about somethings and not too happy about the others. and people keep telling me how sad i look or sound and how crazy i am. and too tell you the truth lifes a little crazy for me right now. ive been fighting with my family alot. and now im having some friend troubles. and its all so horrible. i really just dont know what to do anymore. it hurts so much when people are mad at me or when they defy my trust. im just lost. and i give up now.

So quiet
another wasted night,
the television steals the conversation
exhale,
another wasted breath,
again it goes unnoticed.