(no subject)
Rummaging through my ancient files (it started as a puzzled attempt to find Tigers so I can get on with the fic I owe people) I've turned up all sorts of random stuff, much of which is still online:
Advice on Novel Writing by Crawford Kilian
List: MST3K Rush References
From the alt.support.depression FAQ, How can I help myself get through depression on a day-to-day basis?
Just one of many great moments from talk.bizarre, aboard the nuclear weapon bearing submarine.
Sadly, "Mytholder's guide to dEADEARTH" seems to have vanished from the Intarwubs. But I'll keep ETAing here anything I find that's interesting.
ETA: Amongst some old emails, I found the original, painfully sketchy Blue Box proposal:
BLUE BOX
Outline for an Eighth Doctor Adventure by Kate Orman
Setting
Washington DC, the late seventies. Computer experts are just beginning
to design the Internet. But people fascinated by computers and the
national phone system are already experts at finding their way around
illegally. "Phone phreaks" organise free long-distance calls and
conference calls for their friends.
For Fitz, this is the future; for Anji, it's a past full of fashion
disasters! I'd like to try for a realistic rather than a comedy
Seventies (including avoiding stereotypes of hackers).
Style
The Doctor and his companions use actual seventies technology, plus
clever plans, trickery and chutzpah, rather than resorting to advanced
or alien gadgetry. (I'd like to use just enough technical detail to show
that the phones and computer stuff would genuinely have been possible.)
The emphasis is on how they cunningly achieve their goals, and the risks
of being outsmarted and caught by their opponents. It's only at the end,
faced with an alien menace, that the Doctor's own alienness comes into
play.
Part One
One
The Doctor has sent his companions Fitz and Anji on a mission, keeping
in contact with them by phone. They are to find out where a particular
piece of technology is being kept at a large electronics company.
Whatever this machine is, it's dangerous, and no-one should have it -
the Doctor wants to get hold of it.
Fitz and Anji have been using the phone, and a clunky computer, to
gather information about the company. The Doctor insists they only use
contemporary technology, such as the "blue box" used to manipulate phone
lines illegally. Anji is uncomfortable with this work, but Fitz enjoys
pretending to be a friendly phone company technician in need of
assistance, or an angry company supervisor who wants the information now
dammit.
Neither companion is completely sure what's going on. The Doctor won't
even let them know where he is, though he's obviously not alone. Is he
in danger - being made to give them instructions? There's no way to
tell, they just have to continue.
Fitz and Anji narrowly avoid being found out and traced, but they find
out the name of the company electronics expert in charge of the machine:
Sarah Swan. But now Swan knows someone is interested in her work…
Greedy and vindictive, Swan has a long history of meddling in phones and
computers, but has never been caught. Sometimes she uses her hacking and
phreaking skills to get things for free. She likes to take revenge on
people she dislikes by messing around with their phone service or bills.
Two
Anji and Fitz contact the Doctor, who makes it clear that the machine
they're looking for is dangerous, and no human being should be in
possession of it. The next step is to steal it.
Anji insists that this time their plan their course of action. They go
into the building posing as technicians, and nearly manage to scam their
way into Swan's private laboratory - but she has installed too much
security. After they encounter a suspicious Swan, Fitz and Anji have to
leave the building in a hurry.
Three
Time is running out. Using a combination of technological know-how, fast
talking, and derring-do, the Doctor breaks into the firm's lab,
overcomes Swan's security devices, and retrieves a piece of obviously
alien equipment. Swan - and the police - give chase, but the Doctor
eludes them and is reunited with his companions.
Four
The Doctor introduces Fitz and Anji to the people he's working with.
They are a pair of aliens from Eridani. The aliens are ovoviviparous
amphibians, looking a bit like the letter Y with short yellow fur and
three eyes.
The strange device comes from an Eridani spacecraft that was making its
way to an Eridani colony world. This "slow package" contained a machine,
a sort of supercomputer broken into five components. It has been
travelling since before human beings invented radio. As it passed
through our solar system, the slow package was confused by the signals
it received and landed on Earth by mistake.
As soon as the Eridani realised what had happened, a team was dispatched
in a faster than light ship to retrieve the components. But the package
was found, and the pieces sold by an unwitting junk dealer.
The Eridani managed to find three of the components. Then one of their
team was killed by a human agent they had hired to help them. The human
agent was also killed. At that point, the Doctor stepped in to help them
retrieve the last two components before human beings learn the secrets
of the Eridani technology.
The companions play a vital role in this. The Eridani were obviously
handicapped by not being able to interact with human beings. The Doctor
can pass for human, of course; but Fitz's ability to fake different
personas, and Anji's ability to remember and organise large amounts of
information, make them very good at finding out things and reaching
places they're not supposed to.
Part Two
Five
There is one last machine part left. Once the Doctor helps the Eridani
retrieve it, they can leave Earth.
The Doctor is surprised to receive a phone call from Swan, who boasts
about knowing the location of the missing component. But Swan is
surprised at not being able to get any information about the Doctor,
Fitz, or Anji from her sources. Who are they? Swan promises she will
find out - and set the authorities onto them.
Fitz is sent to set up equipment to monitor Swan's phone calls, while
the Doctor has Anji go through Swan's credit card records since she
moved into her current apartment. Anji crunches the endless lines of
data to discover what security equipment Swan has bought, including
security cameras.
Swan traces the phone the Doctor has been using. The Doctor and the
aliens have to make a hasty exit as the phone company and the police
pursue them.
Six
Swan arranges a meeting with her ex-boyfriend, Luis, to warn him about
the Doctor and his friends. They have a shared past of phreaking and
hacking, which became an electronics career for Swan and a hobby for
Luis. They obtained two of the alien components at the same time: Swan
took the one that looked like a machine, Luis took the one that looked
like a an egg.
Luis is a cheerful man, older than Swan, who has always enjoyed
repairing and improving on machines. He has none of Swan's
vindictiveness, but is awed by her command of computers, phones, and
people.
Luis insists she come home with him to see the component. There's an
alien growing in Luis' bathtub. It's surrounded by phones, TV sets, tape
recorders, and modems. Luis says it spends all day learning how to use
new machines. But then it just stops, as if it doesn't know what it
wants to do with them. Luis has felt compelled to spend most of his time
with the creature.
Seven
Swan cons her way into Luis' apartment and steals the alien creature.
Disguised as a technician, Fitz uses a terminal at the electronics
company to get details on Swan. But he doesn't realise that Swan is
tracing him. He's so wrapped up in what he's doing that Swan is able to
walk right up to him. Fitz is arrested.
Swan phones the Doctor to boast. She's got Fitz, and she's also got what
the Doctor wants. Can't they make a deal? But Swan wants advanced
technology in return, which she'll claim to have invented.
Meanwhile, Luis is absolutely panicked. He demands that Swan return the
alien, or he'll provide evidence of his illegal activities to the
authorities. Swan says Luis will never find him.
The Doctor plugs into one of Swan's own security cameras, and discovers
that the missing component is a living being.
Part Three
Eight
Anji escaped arrest, and notifies the Doctor that Fitz is in police
custody. Fitz's lack of an identity in this time period is now a
liability, not an advantage.
The Doctor angrily confronts the Eridani about their use of a living
being as a machine component. They explain that's an Eridani child,
engineered to become an "idiot savant": it has no awareness of its own,
but its brain is capable of incredible feats of calculation.
What's more, the savant will be pregnant with a clutch of eggs. It is
cheap, self-reproducing technology. And now a greedy con artist has it
in his possession.
Nine
The Doctor poses as a police detective to rescue Fitz.
Luis pursues Swan relentlessly, using his phone phreaking skills to
track her. He locates her at a mutual friend's apartment. Cornered, Swan
threatens to kill the savant, but the Doctor and companions have been
tracking both of them and arrive in time to rescue the creature. Swan
escapes with Luis.
Ten
In self-preservation, the savant has created a copy of itself - turning
Luis into another savant. Not only can the savant creature manipulate
machines with ease, but it is a sort of "blue box" for the human brain,
able to make it do whatever it wants. Swan plans to sell its eggs to the
highest bidder.
Swan uses Luis to rob a bank - Luis is able to simply convince the
teller to hand over the money. Tuned in to police communications, the
Doctor realises what is happening. Swan must be stopped - and the Doctor
will have to go after him without his human companions.
Part Four
Eleven
The Doctor breaks out the high technology. Fitz and Alys stay in contact
with him via "miniature radios" as he pursues Swan across the California
countryside. They gather information from the police, from Swan's phone
calls, from any source they can to keep the Doctor close behind her.
The Doctor finally catches up with them. Swan has a gun, and threatens
to kill either the Doctor or Luis if he isn't left alone. But the Doctor
knows Luis is manipulating Swan to protect him; the savant is trying to
preserve itself. The human brains it affects are just peripherals.
The Doctor has an Eridani device which he uses to "shut down" Luis. But
the savant instantly "jumps" to Swan. Dodging bullets, as well as an
attack on his own brain, the Doctor shuts down Swan as well.
Twelve
Neither Swan nor Luis can be restored to normalcy. The Eridani offer to
take them along when they return to their home world. But the Doctor now
knows the savant was never a supercomputer, but a weapon the Eridani
planned to use to control their own colony. He has left the "shut down"
device, plus its technical specifications, with UNIT in case the Eridani
ever decide to revisit Earth..."
ETA:
Advice on Novel Writing by Crawford Kilian
List: MST3K Rush References
From the alt.support.depression FAQ, How can I help myself get through depression on a day-to-day basis?
Just one of many great moments from talk.bizarre, aboard the nuclear weapon bearing submarine.
Sadly, "Mytholder's guide to dEADEARTH" seems to have vanished from the Intarwubs. But I'll keep ETAing here anything I find that's interesting.
ETA: Amongst some old emails, I found the original, painfully sketchy Blue Box proposal:
BLUE BOX
Outline for an Eighth Doctor Adventure by Kate Orman
Setting
Washington DC, the late seventies. Computer experts are just beginning
to design the Internet. But people fascinated by computers and the
national phone system are already experts at finding their way around
illegally. "Phone phreaks" organise free long-distance calls and
conference calls for their friends.
For Fitz, this is the future; for Anji, it's a past full of fashion
disasters! I'd like to try for a realistic rather than a comedy
Seventies (including avoiding stereotypes of hackers).
Style
The Doctor and his companions use actual seventies technology, plus
clever plans, trickery and chutzpah, rather than resorting to advanced
or alien gadgetry. (I'd like to use just enough technical detail to show
that the phones and computer stuff would genuinely have been possible.)
The emphasis is on how they cunningly achieve their goals, and the risks
of being outsmarted and caught by their opponents. It's only at the end,
faced with an alien menace, that the Doctor's own alienness comes into
play.
Part One
One
The Doctor has sent his companions Fitz and Anji on a mission, keeping
in contact with them by phone. They are to find out where a particular
piece of technology is being kept at a large electronics company.
Whatever this machine is, it's dangerous, and no-one should have it -
the Doctor wants to get hold of it.
Fitz and Anji have been using the phone, and a clunky computer, to
gather information about the company. The Doctor insists they only use
contemporary technology, such as the "blue box" used to manipulate phone
lines illegally. Anji is uncomfortable with this work, but Fitz enjoys
pretending to be a friendly phone company technician in need of
assistance, or an angry company supervisor who wants the information now
dammit.
Neither companion is completely sure what's going on. The Doctor won't
even let them know where he is, though he's obviously not alone. Is he
in danger - being made to give them instructions? There's no way to
tell, they just have to continue.
Fitz and Anji narrowly avoid being found out and traced, but they find
out the name of the company electronics expert in charge of the machine:
Sarah Swan. But now Swan knows someone is interested in her work…
Greedy and vindictive, Swan has a long history of meddling in phones and
computers, but has never been caught. Sometimes she uses her hacking and
phreaking skills to get things for free. She likes to take revenge on
people she dislikes by messing around with their phone service or bills.
Two
Anji and Fitz contact the Doctor, who makes it clear that the machine
they're looking for is dangerous, and no human being should be in
possession of it. The next step is to steal it.
Anji insists that this time their plan their course of action. They go
into the building posing as technicians, and nearly manage to scam their
way into Swan's private laboratory - but she has installed too much
security. After they encounter a suspicious Swan, Fitz and Anji have to
leave the building in a hurry.
Three
Time is running out. Using a combination of technological know-how, fast
talking, and derring-do, the Doctor breaks into the firm's lab,
overcomes Swan's security devices, and retrieves a piece of obviously
alien equipment. Swan - and the police - give chase, but the Doctor
eludes them and is reunited with his companions.
Four
The Doctor introduces Fitz and Anji to the people he's working with.
They are a pair of aliens from Eridani. The aliens are ovoviviparous
amphibians, looking a bit like the letter Y with short yellow fur and
three eyes.
The strange device comes from an Eridani spacecraft that was making its
way to an Eridani colony world. This "slow package" contained a machine,
a sort of supercomputer broken into five components. It has been
travelling since before human beings invented radio. As it passed
through our solar system, the slow package was confused by the signals
it received and landed on Earth by mistake.
As soon as the Eridani realised what had happened, a team was dispatched
in a faster than light ship to retrieve the components. But the package
was found, and the pieces sold by an unwitting junk dealer.
The Eridani managed to find three of the components. Then one of their
team was killed by a human agent they had hired to help them. The human
agent was also killed. At that point, the Doctor stepped in to help them
retrieve the last two components before human beings learn the secrets
of the Eridani technology.
The companions play a vital role in this. The Eridani were obviously
handicapped by not being able to interact with human beings. The Doctor
can pass for human, of course; but Fitz's ability to fake different
personas, and Anji's ability to remember and organise large amounts of
information, make them very good at finding out things and reaching
places they're not supposed to.
Part Two
Five
There is one last machine part left. Once the Doctor helps the Eridani
retrieve it, they can leave Earth.
The Doctor is surprised to receive a phone call from Swan, who boasts
about knowing the location of the missing component. But Swan is
surprised at not being able to get any information about the Doctor,
Fitz, or Anji from her sources. Who are they? Swan promises she will
find out - and set the authorities onto them.
Fitz is sent to set up equipment to monitor Swan's phone calls, while
the Doctor has Anji go through Swan's credit card records since she
moved into her current apartment. Anji crunches the endless lines of
data to discover what security equipment Swan has bought, including
security cameras.
Swan traces the phone the Doctor has been using. The Doctor and the
aliens have to make a hasty exit as the phone company and the police
pursue them.
Six
Swan arranges a meeting with her ex-boyfriend, Luis, to warn him about
the Doctor and his friends. They have a shared past of phreaking and
hacking, which became an electronics career for Swan and a hobby for
Luis. They obtained two of the alien components at the same time: Swan
took the one that looked like a machine, Luis took the one that looked
like a an egg.
Luis is a cheerful man, older than Swan, who has always enjoyed
repairing and improving on machines. He has none of Swan's
vindictiveness, but is awed by her command of computers, phones, and
people.
Luis insists she come home with him to see the component. There's an
alien growing in Luis' bathtub. It's surrounded by phones, TV sets, tape
recorders, and modems. Luis says it spends all day learning how to use
new machines. But then it just stops, as if it doesn't know what it
wants to do with them. Luis has felt compelled to spend most of his time
with the creature.
Seven
Swan cons her way into Luis' apartment and steals the alien creature.
Disguised as a technician, Fitz uses a terminal at the electronics
company to get details on Swan. But he doesn't realise that Swan is
tracing him. He's so wrapped up in what he's doing that Swan is able to
walk right up to him. Fitz is arrested.
Swan phones the Doctor to boast. She's got Fitz, and she's also got what
the Doctor wants. Can't they make a deal? But Swan wants advanced
technology in return, which she'll claim to have invented.
Meanwhile, Luis is absolutely panicked. He demands that Swan return the
alien, or he'll provide evidence of his illegal activities to the
authorities. Swan says Luis will never find him.
The Doctor plugs into one of Swan's own security cameras, and discovers
that the missing component is a living being.
Part Three
Eight
Anji escaped arrest, and notifies the Doctor that Fitz is in police
custody. Fitz's lack of an identity in this time period is now a
liability, not an advantage.
The Doctor angrily confronts the Eridani about their use of a living
being as a machine component. They explain that's an Eridani child,
engineered to become an "idiot savant": it has no awareness of its own,
but its brain is capable of incredible feats of calculation.
What's more, the savant will be pregnant with a clutch of eggs. It is
cheap, self-reproducing technology. And now a greedy con artist has it
in his possession.
Nine
The Doctor poses as a police detective to rescue Fitz.
Luis pursues Swan relentlessly, using his phone phreaking skills to
track her. He locates her at a mutual friend's apartment. Cornered, Swan
threatens to kill the savant, but the Doctor and companions have been
tracking both of them and arrive in time to rescue the creature. Swan
escapes with Luis.
Ten
In self-preservation, the savant has created a copy of itself - turning
Luis into another savant. Not only can the savant creature manipulate
machines with ease, but it is a sort of "blue box" for the human brain,
able to make it do whatever it wants. Swan plans to sell its eggs to the
highest bidder.
Swan uses Luis to rob a bank - Luis is able to simply convince the
teller to hand over the money. Tuned in to police communications, the
Doctor realises what is happening. Swan must be stopped - and the Doctor
will have to go after him without his human companions.
Part Four
Eleven
The Doctor breaks out the high technology. Fitz and Alys stay in contact
with him via "miniature radios" as he pursues Swan across the California
countryside. They gather information from the police, from Swan's phone
calls, from any source they can to keep the Doctor close behind her.
The Doctor finally catches up with them. Swan has a gun, and threatens
to kill either the Doctor or Luis if he isn't left alone. But the Doctor
knows Luis is manipulating Swan to protect him; the savant is trying to
preserve itself. The human brains it affects are just peripherals.
The Doctor has an Eridani device which he uses to "shut down" Luis. But
the savant instantly "jumps" to Swan. Dodging bullets, as well as an
attack on his own brain, the Doctor shuts down Swan as well.
Twelve
Neither Swan nor Luis can be restored to normalcy. The Eridani offer to
take them along when they return to their home world. But the Doctor now
knows the savant was never a supercomputer, but a weapon the Eridani
planned to use to control their own colony. He has left the "shut down"
device, plus its technical specifications, with UNIT in case the Eridani
ever decide to revisit Earth..."
ETA: