Wise and Sage MSN Horoscopes
I read, like, four horoscopes and/or online Tarot card reading thingies a day. I love them. I want them to be true so, even it they're bad, at least I know what's coming. I anxiously wait for the www.astrologyzone.com monthly forecast because that woman knows. Read it. You'll see. So today, MSN's daily Tarot reading--addressed to lksdfj, their personal nickname for me--was a gem. I thought I'd share:
"Today, the Tarot's leading lady combines with the World to increase your charm tenfold, turning you into the friendliest person on the planet!"
Dude! It's like they know me!
"You chatter away, wanting to know everything about those close to you and to understand every aspect of love. In all, lksdfj, you want to win over everyone and everything around you."
Uh, yeah. Duh. They really do know me.
"Professionally speaking, what counts today is intelligence and competence."
As opposed to the general hack-ass, retarded job that counts other days? I'll be sure to tell my clients that I'll be extra full of intelligence and competence today, but all bets are off for next week.
Of course, making fun of this stuff is too easy, but whatever. We all know I'm not funny. Chatty? Yes? Charming? Well, I'd like to think so. But as the Class of 1997, Locust Valley High School declared, I am not funny.
"Today, the Tarot's leading lady combines with the World to increase your charm tenfold, turning you into the friendliest person on the planet!"
Dude! It's like they know me!
"You chatter away, wanting to know everything about those close to you and to understand every aspect of love. In all, lksdfj, you want to win over everyone and everything around you."
Uh, yeah. Duh. They really do know me.
"Professionally speaking, what counts today is intelligence and competence."
As opposed to the general hack-ass, retarded job that counts other days? I'll be sure to tell my clients that I'll be extra full of intelligence and competence today, but all bets are off for next week.
Of course, making fun of this stuff is too easy, but whatever. We all know I'm not funny. Chatty? Yes? Charming? Well, I'd like to think so. But as the Class of 1997, Locust Valley High School declared, I am not funny.